i could use some advice/support here...

[Aria_Joy87]

ok, so maybe my title was sort of stating the obvious, but whatever... here's what's going on. i don't have time right now to go through every detail of what's going on in my life right now, so i'll have to shorten it some...

for once in my life i feel i am exactly where i am supposed to be. i've finally given all of my worries and fears over to God, and i feel 10000% better than i ever have in my entire life. i finally know what God wants me to do, and even though i'm still a LONG LONG way from perfect, i know that God's telling me that i'm on the right path and i'm doing exactly what He wants me to do. i've never felt better in my entire life.

the problem is my mother. we got in an argument/conversation yesterday and she's all "i just don't know what's going on with you." "You have this attitude with me all the time now" "you're trying to belittle my feelings" etc... i've explained to her how i feel and everything, and i don't understand why she's all against me on it. she's a Christian, yes (i'm sure that was probably on some of your minds...) i feel strange because mom and i have ALWAYS been SOOOO close my entire life, and i feel like this is driving a wedge between us. i don't want that. but i also know that i have to do what God's telling me to do. i keep praying that mom will find this same peace that i have... i know God's telling me i'm on the right track, just keep going... but i don't like this rift that's forming between mom and i....


any thoughts?

 

[bubblegirl23]

Many situations are trying on family relationships. When discussing don't place blame of any sort. I rarely fight with my mother & that's because we can have conversation, but leave emotion out of it. When discussing touchy subjects leave your criticisms at the door!

 

[Aria_Joy87]

i wasn't criticizing her though. she asked me what was going on with me, and i told her how God's changing and working in my life. and she said that i was belittling her feelings when i told her i didn't understand what she meant about my "attitude" or whatever... i was just trying to talk to her, and she started freaking out and getting all mad about it... i don't understand...

 

[Rafael]

I can't talk with my parents either, not really. So if you've been able to, then that is a plus. I just honor my parents as best I can and keep in mind that we all make mistakes and so do they. In time, if you keep reaching out to her and insuring her that you love her, she will probably be alright with anything new in your life. Be patient and loving, but don't let her spoil your focus on God. Forget what is past and move forward in love towards the goal is the best advice I can give.

 

[HumbleBee]

Aria_joy87,

Sounds like your Mom is on the defensive, even way oversensitive...her pride could be at issue. Could be she is challenged by your spiritual progress, cuz maybe she not growing as fast. Be humble and keep loving on her unconditionally. Don't let the enemy steal your joy, nor try to hinder your going on and upwards in God!

Isaiah 54:17 no weapon forged against you will prevail, and you will refute every tongue that accuses you. This is the heritage of the servants of the LORD, and this is their vindication from Me," declares the LORD.

Matthew 5:9-12 Blessed are the peacemakers, for they will be called sons of God. Blessed are those who are persecuted because of righteousness, for theirs is the kingdom of heaven. Blessed are you when people insult you, persecute you and falsely say all kinds of evil against you because of Me. Rejoice and be glad, because great is your reward in heaven, for in the same way they persecuted the prophets who were before you.

Ephesians 6:10-12 Finally, be strong in the Lord and in His mighty power. Put on the full armor of God so that you can take your stand against the devil's schemes. For our struggle is not against flesh and blood, but against the rulers, against the authorities, against the powers of this dark world and against the spiritual forces of evil in the heavenly realms.

 

[Aria_Joy87]

thanks for those verses... they really did help me a lot.

i was praying about this yesterday in ISS (long story as to why i was there...it was stupid) and i opened up my Bible and the first thing i saw was this verse:

"Do not suppose that i have come to bring peace to the Earth. I did not come to bring peace, but a sword. For i have come to turn a man against his father, a daughter against her mother, a daughter-in-law against her mother-in-law, a man's enemieswill be the members of his own household. Anyone who loves his father or mother more than me is not worthy of me..." Matthew 11:34-37

is that amazing or what? i'd love to talk about this more, but unfortunately, this class is almost over. i'll probably be on next period, though. ciao!

 

[HumbleBee]

Aria_Joy, glad to be of encouragement to you! Here's more...

Psalm 119:105 [God's] word is a lamp unto [your] feet, and a light unto [your] path.

Exodus 14:14 The LORD shall fight for you, and ye shall hold your peace.

Romans 8:31 What shall we then say to these things? If God be for us, who can be against us?

1 Peter 2:19-24 For it is commendable if a man bears up under the pain of unjust suffering because he is conscious of God...if you suffer for doing good and you endure it, this is commendable before God. To this you were called, because Christ suffered for you, leaving you an example, that you should follow in His steps. "He committed no sin, and no deceit was found in His mouth." When they hurled their insults at Him, He did not retaliate; when He suffered, He made no threats. Instead, He entrusted Himself to Him who judges justly. He himself bore our sins in His body on the tree, so that we might die to sins and live for righteousness; by His wounds you have been healed.

 

[InTheFlame]

It's fairly common that when we start making big changes in our lives, especially for the better, we run the risk of alienating loved ones. They're used to dealing with our old 'selves' (for want of a better term!) and when we change, that upsets the relationship. eg. If someone's used to bailing a person out when they get into trouble and places some of their self-esteem and self-worth into doing that, and the person stops getting into trouble and straightens their life out ... suddenly the helper has lost some self-esteem, some self-worth, and a hobby.

MAYBE (and I could be wrong!) it would help to sit down with your mum and just listen to her... talk about her and how she's going... and DON'T give any advice or suggestions, just listen, sympathise or whatever, show her you care about how she's going. One thing I've noticed about myself is that sometimes when I'm going through a big spiritual growth spurt, I can get a little condescending to the people around me and think I'm more spiritually mature than them... and maybe in a particular area I am. But I've noticed that often I'm just noticing their faults, and not realising just how many strengths they have, and what life experience and wisdom they DO have. I'm not saying you've done this... I do think that maybe your mum has taken some of your comments about your own life as indirect criticisms of her own. Personally I find it really hard to avoid giving my own opinion on people's lives as they tell me about it... but it IS possible, I HAVE managed it a couple of times!

 

[Aria_Joy87]

thanks for all the advice everyone. its really helped a lot. things have been going a lot better the past couple of days... mom and i have been talking, and i think she's starting to understand finally.

i'm really glad to have a place like this where i can come and talk about htings and have friends who will actually listen and give great, Christian advice. may God bless all of you! and i hope to be taking with you all a lot real soon! *smile*

 

[Yitzchak]

Sometimes people get in too much of hurry and under lots of pressure when they feel their children are not acting the way they want them to. I suggest trying to calm and slow things down a little in your conversations and don't try to force it. If both your hearts are in the right place it will work out eventually and trying to rush or force it to work out immediately can cause hurts which need to be healed later.
I hope it resolves itself soon.