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I am single because...
- Thread starter Love&Pain
- Start date
sculpturegirl
Well-Known Member
When I was about 13/14 I had such terrible self esteem, which seemed strange because as a child I was very confident and outgoing. I started starving myself, which turned into an eating disorder that lasted 5 years! Boys didn't seem that interested in my and I figured that it was because I was ugly and fat. At 110 pounds, I am not sure how I came to the conclusion that I was fat. I remember going to summer camp after the 10th grade and one of the older camp counsellors told me that I was very attractive. He certainly could not have been talking about me!! Over the next few years GOD was telling me that He saw me as beautiful! By my second year in college I came to accept and love my figure. "God saw what he had made and it was good." I didn't look much different, but I became beautiful. As soon as I realized it guys started noticing me.
At 27, I am now engaged after being very lonesome much of my life. Just as a word of encouragement- God heals every part of us!!
On a more superficial note... I agree that while our hearts matter more and our self-confidence, found in Christ, makes us beautiful, it isn't to say that physical beauty matters nothing at all. There are things we can do to convey to others that we value ourselves and therefore others ought to value us as well. For example, find $50 and go to a swanky hairstylist. Get a nice hair-do and advice from the stylist. Keep yourself clean and refrain from wearing illfitting, dirty and wrinkly clothes. Excerise and eat well- this will do wonders for your skin (YES it works believe it or not!), your figure and your self-confidence! God made you and when He saw what He had made He called it Good!! Now, me must be good stewards to what God has given us!
At 27, I am now engaged after being very lonesome much of my life. Just as a word of encouragement- God heals every part of us!!
On a more superficial note... I agree that while our hearts matter more and our self-confidence, found in Christ, makes us beautiful, it isn't to say that physical beauty matters nothing at all. There are things we can do to convey to others that we value ourselves and therefore others ought to value us as well. For example, find $50 and go to a swanky hairstylist. Get a nice hair-do and advice from the stylist. Keep yourself clean and refrain from wearing illfitting, dirty and wrinkly clothes. Excerise and eat well- this will do wonders for your skin (YES it works believe it or not!), your figure and your self-confidence! God made you and when He saw what He had made He called it Good!! Now, me must be good stewards to what God has given us!
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there are no single guys here at my school that are good enough--i'm not trying to be elitist or stuck-up, but really, none of the guys that I have met here at my school match my standards in what I am looking for. Or it could just be that I have a lot of dorky friends that don't have much of a life--like my music friends-heh
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Fatolia
War, love, and prayer...my life
I'm single because of choice. There's too much to do for God's kingdom. There's time for love (which is God's will), yes, but not time for the long type of committment necessary to share intimacy with a woman. I'd really love to lift up and cherish a woman, but I just haven't been able to figure out how to do that without sacrificing some of my obsession with Jesus.
Plus, I just find that most women can't handle me. I tend to scare em all away with my extreme bluntness and directness. HA!
;-D
Plus, I just find that most women can't handle me. I tend to scare em all away with my extreme bluntness and directness. HA!
;-D
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ShanelMarie
Member
- Jan 7, 2005
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I am single because right now God's plan for me does not include a boyfriend. I am waiting though.....but it has got to be perfect when the time is right!!!
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ShanelMarie said:I am single because right now God's plan for me does not include a boyfriend. I am waiting though.....but it has got to be perfect when the time is right!!!
how do you know that this is God's plan for you?
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Fatolia said:
Amen! It is awesome to hear that you are focusing on God and God alone.
I pray that the Lord continue to bless you in every way in your life. May you continue to grow more like Christ. May you grow in patience, love, wisdom and peace. 
Continue seeking his will for your life. Be blessed!
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sculpturegirl said:
Thank you for sharing your story with us.
I am happy to hear that God is using you. God sees us as beautiful creatures because he created us. We who are many, form one body and in that body we are like Christ. May God continue to bless you in your relationship. May you continue to help those who struggle in areas in which you were once weak. I love you sister!
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Fatolia
War, love, and prayer...my life
Thank you so much Miss Wonderfully Thoughtful! I wish I could rep you
love4jesus said:Amen! It is awesome to hear that you are focusing on God and God alone.
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Fatolia said:
I repped you for your awesome post.
You may rep me, if that is what you desire. thank you for calling me 'Miss Wonderfully thoughtful.' You have a kind heart, full of compassion and God will use you to reach others.
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jonnylove
Regular Member
I'm single because, I'm scared of rejection and I never know for sure if a woman likes me, so because i'm not sure if they like me or not and because I'm scared of being rejected, I never ask them out. When I was younger I had a couple of offers from girls, but because I was so shy I used to back off and run in the opposite direction. I've been single all my life and asked 2 women out who both rejected me, which was not a very nice feeling. I'm a lot more confident now and am no longer shy, I could probaly talk to anybody now (although the shyness comes back now and then but not much), but I'm still scared to ask women out because of that nagging fear of rejection. well thanks for listening. C ya.
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Fatolia
War, love, and prayer...my life
jonnylove said:I'm single because, I'm scared of rejection and I never know for sure if a woman likes me, so because i'm not sure if they like me or not and because I'm scared of being rejected, I never ask them out. When I was younger I had a couple of offers from girls, but because I was so shy I used to back off and run in the opposite direction. I've been single all my life and asked 2 women out who both rejected me, which was not a very nice feeling. I'm a lot more confident now and am no longer shy, I could probaly talk to anybody now (although the shyness comes back now and then but not much), but I'm still scared to ask women out because of that nagging fear of rejection. well thanks for listening. C ya.
Yeah that hurts man. But just think of women as guys with long hair (or even some with not long hair) and all your problems will seem to disappear.
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boilerblues
Well-Known Member
Fatolia said:
Not sure I agree with you there, women work in a very different way than men. It's important to understand the necessary boundaries between men and women.
Fear of rejection is hard. The best way to deal with fear is to grow in faith. In this instance it's a matter of growing in faith that you are a child of God, made in His image, and that He wants to bless you. Not every woman is going to say yes, but that as you grow in the Lord then you become more discerning as to who you pursue and God will lead you to the one that says yes (throwing in the disclaimer that not everyone will find a wife or husband, we have to trust that God is good in that situation also).
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Fatolia
War, love, and prayer...my life
Again, are we focusing on spiritual issues here or more physical ones like personality and looks, etc? Women struggle with the same sin issues that men do. Maybe different magnitudes in different areas, but as I see women in a more spiritual context, I think of them as guys who look and act a bit differently than us.
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