Habitual liars and manipulators are very insecure and frightened individuals.
They want to be in control of every part of there lives. To do this they need to control others that interact with them.
The first thing you should do is find out what type of person you are. And I don't mean to find out your faults, but to find out how you interact with people.
Studies have shown that manipulators hang around people of certain persuasion. And that even though the person is annoyed at the manipulator, they tolerate it because of voids and fears and dysfunctions within themselves.
And LOL, I can't believe I am saying this AGAIN, but I know what you are inquiring about.
I had a friend who was a control freak ( He confessed he was later in our friendship, but it wasn't a life changing revelation )
Anyway, I put up with it and wasn't even aware that I was puting up with it.
Until God led me to a wonderful book called "Boundaries" by Cloud & Townsend.
After I read it, no, while I was reading it the lights came on and I was shown what my personality traits were like and realised that by me not doing anything, I actually encouraged the controling behaviour.
It had to be confronted and brought out into the open. I did, He didn't like it, we are not friends any more. He wasn't willing to seek help to be free from it or even try to understand why he was behaving in such a way, so I chose to end the friendship.
And this is not an issue of judging someone because of their faults. We all have character flaws and faults. What God had done was show me who I really am, and He continues to do this daily with me. But at the same time He taught me that if someone's behaviour is hurtful or destructive toward me, I don't have to put up with it.
The word does say to get along with people as best as you can, BUT, if the person is abusive , I am allowed to walk away .
And manipulative people are abusive, not only to others but to themselves.
Now we could then take this concept further and say, "Well if we all did this, we would all avoid and walk away from everyone "
There would be no interaction as we ALL have faults and none of us are perfect and nice to each other.
The answer to this dilemma is what God does with someone when He reveals who they are really.
When I told my friend that the friendship was over, it was because I did not have the Christlike ability to endure such abusive behaviour and God was basically saying , "Get out of that environment "
That was 5 years ago, God has since then been making me more Christlike day by day, I am now able to be in the company of manipulators and not be offended or affected by them, but love them and help them.
The simple answer is someone can only take advantage of you if you allow them. If they have a hissy fit because you refuse to be manipulated, don't feel guilty, because it's their choice if they want to get emotional about it. LOL having a hissy fit is simply emotional manipulation or blackmail anyway.
It's not a sin to say NO to someone, and sometimes it's exactly what they need to hear.
Watch the reactions of people when you say no compared to when you say yes. Most people get so cut when you use that word. Doesn't mean you are being ungodly or rude. It just means you can't or wont comply to their wishes. Manipulators just react more than others because of their insecurities.
But in all things you do in interactions with people, make sure what you do and say is what God is asking you to do, otherwise you will find you are living through YOUR own insecurities and character dysfunctions.
This is why God says," Let Christ be formed in you, let His loving and gracious character flow out of you. "
