Hurting and very confused

[JustOneLife]

I feel like I've been in the valley for the past three years. The first two were with someone whom I found out the hard way was not my friend) deeply (and when I say deeply, I'm talking deeply) hurt me by lying to me several times about things she promised to do for me and she promised me that she would always be there for me when I needed her and she was sometimes but...in 2003, Everything changed.... By that time, We had pretty much grown apart and to this day, I still have no idea what happened between us. I got REALLY sick and tired of her lying to me too. I think (although I could be totally wrong) part of what happened was God saw that I was putting her (and my other friends at church) above Him, I was trying to get their love and acceptance from them all the time instead of going to God, and I mean she was like my second big sister and another was that I got my sense of security from my friends so I found out real fast that God won't tolerate ANY person (or thing for that matter) above Him (and believe me, I begged Him and whined like a two year old (lol!) to let her back into my life. no go) Anyway, to make a long story short, I tried several times to get in touch with her and she never responded back so I eventually gave up trying to get a hold of her and just took her hurting me as her way of not only rejecting me (or at least it feels like she has but what else am I supposed to think?) but also saying "I don't want to be your friend anymore." Someone who promised to take you to lunch in '98 and still hasn't done it isn't much of a friend. She's one of the reasons why I've literally gotten to where I hate going to church, her, and I don't fit in at my church and have no friends (well, I have one but I'm beginning to wonder if we've grown apart too) My church is so snobby and everyone has their own little cliques that it's not even funny, I think it's very sad and pathetic..I mean, The church is the bride of Christ!!

I went to church several weeks ago (the person I've been talking about, Anne, wasn't there) I was never so happy to get out of a church service in my life. I used to LOVE going to church (of course, That was back when I thought I had real, Christian friends who loved and cared about me, Boy, was I wrong!) Sometimes (OK, A lot of times) I look at myself and wonder "What is wrong with me?" "What did I do to make Anne reject and hurt me the way she did?" "Do I have a problem?"

The other thing, of course, is my dad's death. I think it is so sad (and not that I'm sad about my dad every Sunday) but when I want to talk to someone at church, I can't because they're so stuck-up and I have to put on my "everything is fine. I'm great" mask when inside I'm crying and dying for a friend.... What do I do?

God Bless,
JustOneLife

 

[Romanseight2005]

Go to the Lord. Pray and ask Him to lead you to the right church, and to lead the right people into your life. If you need to ask forgiveness, do it. Be open to go wherever He leads. I am sorry for your pain, The good news is that God can heal it!

Phil 4:5-7
Lord is near. 6 Do not be anxious about anything, but in everything, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God. 7 And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus.
NIV

 

[JPPT1974]

Lord help our friend to find
The right church and that
Our friend will be moved by you
And your guidance and love
In thy name and will amen

 

[bfly]

Praying

 

[jlwmomof4]

I'm sorry to hear that you don't feel comfortable at your church.......maybe God is trying to lead you to the church he needs you at. Did you ever look at it that way? He knows better than any where we should be and who are friends should be too! I have a friend or rather did have a friend who put conditions on our friendship, so I had to let it go......if the Lord wants her to be in my life he will lead me back. Maybe your friend, wasn't the kind that the Lord knows you need in your life right now. He knows the plan for our life, and most of the time things don't make sense, at least they don't to me, lol,. Its later on down the road that I say " I see why you did that Lord". I will ask the Lord to bless you and will pray for the friends that God wants in your life to hurry and show up............luck , jlwmomof4

 

[JacobsDream]

Father I pray and ask that you fix whatever this situation is about.
Heal her of past disappointments and grant her the faith to put her trust in you in everything, you never disappoint.
Fill the void in her heart especially with the loss of her father and may she continue a steady and consistent walk with you in Jesus name.

 

[tapero]

Dear Lord, I pray for justonelife that she would have true joy in you. I pray she would have some fellowship and close friendships Lord. Please send her someone special to yourself and help her not to put them above you Lord. Thank you. In your name I pray. Amen

 

[Onlythingavailable]

Your friend seems to really have hurt you, or at the very least had a large impact on your life. I suggest you deal with it by talking to someone about it, possibly your pastor. Don't leave it be, instead face it head on, break its hold over you and get control of your life back.

Praying for you.

 

[ChrisCountryGirl]

 

[SunMessenger]

In The Name Of Jesus Christ Our Savior I Pray That The Holy Spirit Enter And Meet All Needs. This I Pray In The Name Of Jesus Christ Who Suffered Torture At The Hands Of Men So That We May Be Forgiven. Amen

 

[mhoward55]

I think Roman had given you some good advice. I am praying for you too.

 

[JPPT1974]

Lord please help this family out
And that they will lean on you
For guidance and support
To find the right church
In thy name and will amen