How to walk into a church for the first time?

Sketcher said:

There is nothing in there that can accommodate a coffee cup (yes, I have seen this).

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Shudders, I've been in one church where they had coffee cup holders in the chairs with a full coffee shop in their fellowship hall. And if you didnt want to be in church, you could sit and watch the service from the coffee shop TV.

Welcome to CF! We are glad that you've joined us!

I've visited a new church for the first time, often alone, literally hundreds of times.

Of course I had the background of having been in a worship service before, even if it was a bit different.

For a non-denominational church (there are different kinds) they will fall within a certain range. If you can, you might like to find out how you are expected to dress at the particular one, so you aren't uncomfortable if you guess that part wrong. If you can't find out in advance, business casual is usual middle-of-the-road enough to fit in most places (as long as they are at neither extreme of casual or formal).

Beyond that the level of attention you will get depends partly on how large the congregation is. The smaller the congregation, the more notice you will get. In a medium sized congregation (at least several hundred) you can begin to go more unnoticed if you want.

As stated, the easiest thing to do is whatever everyone else does.

The greatest majority of services will have a session of music followed by the teaching/preaching.

What kind of music will vary. The older hymns that people stand or sit in place and sing are becoming rarer. More common are the "contemporary praise and worship" where some stay in their place (usually standing), some may gather at the front. People may or may not raise their hands or dance. I have seen a smaller percentage of others though that had performance dancers, or hard rock bands, or laser light shows, or a full performing orchestra. It varies a LOT. People may follow a prescribed stand-sit-sing-silent or may move all over the sanctuary and dance. But most often I have seen where people are free to remain in place and a few come up, and you can sing or not. It's usually easy to do whatever you're comfortable with and still fit in.

And the teaching/preaching part is easy from the congregant's part.

There are often invitations, prayers, times of praying for people, etc. Again you can usually do whatever makes you comfortable.

Sorry ... I've been to SO many churches, and so many of different kinds, but probably about a hundred non-denoms included. For the most part, they likely won't do anything that will shock you (though realize that if anything DOES bother you, it almost certainly doesn't represent every church out there) ... and it's unlikely that you would unwittingly offend them or stand out in any bad way.

You'll probably find afterward that any general anxiety was nothing to be concerned with, and if anything particular should bother you, it is often unique to that particular fellowship.

I can understand it's worrisome, but you'll probably find it much easier than you might be fearing.

God be with you!

GreekOrthodox said:

Shudders, I've been in one church where they had coffee cup holders in the chairs with a full coffee shop in their fellowship hall. And if you didnt want to be in church, you could sit and watch the service from the coffee shop TV.

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Ugh I've been in one like that. Unfortunately it was with my brother and sister - they finally started going to church and they love it.

It was probably the one I'd place below every other fellowship I've ever been to. It's hard to call it a church at all. They met in the convention center, played secular music, made NO mention of anything of the Gospel during the service (the closest was that the church and pastor were there to help you feel good in your life - and that's a FAR cry). I missed visiting the local Greek congregation for the first time in order to go with them. I'm glad they go somewhere on Sunday and are oriented toward God but ... I was so disappointed in the meeting.

Messianic_Friend said:

Title says it all!

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If you are talking about attending a church you have never gone to before. I always just walk in and if someone greats me I great them back. Then I go sit down and wait for the service to start. If no one greats me I still just go sit down and wait for things to start. If they have a visitor information thing to fill out in the seat then I may do so and put in the offering when it comes by. Anyway that is what I have always done.

Sketcher said:

Please don't bring coffee into the sanctuary. There is nothing in there that can accommodate a coffee cup (yes, I have seen this).

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LOL I take tea into to church. But my church is okay with that. But yeah if it is your first time at a new church I would agree with not taking coffee or tea with you.

Sketcher said:

- Please don't bring coffee into the sanctuary. There is nothing in there that can accommodate a coffee cup (yes, I have seen this).

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Where I currently attend church there are only a couple of rows of seats, and the rest of the chairs are arranged around (round) small tables, each with a small bowl of fruit slices. You are free to bring coffee into the "sanctuary" (I never tho't of calling it that). In the vestibule you can pick up a cup of coffee or tea. If you feel uncomfortable with the informal seating, you can always sit in the rows provided.

It is very much a come-as-you-are place - all ages, and lots of children (who love the fruit slices). Children leave of Sunday Club before some one speaks. Every other week there is communion after the speaker. There is also two slots for prayer - before and after the sermon. There is a period for "response" afterward, meaning you can go to a small "corner" and kneel to pray, go to a table and write a prayer note, fold it and put it into a bowl for prayer (these notes are not opened or read), you can speak and/or pray with someone. After the service there are sandwiches and coffee and a lot of chatting around the small coffee tables. It's not big and overwhelming - maybe 75-100 with children. Not a place to be frightened of. But if you expect to have formal ritualised services, and standard "look at the back of the head" in front of you, you may feel disgruntled ... because of your own preferences and expectations.

There are things I'd rather have different, but the friendliness and the age-spread make it a happy place. The preaching is good too, though not "hot and zealous." Music varies with the music group in charge, but it tends to be soundboard, guitars, and sometimes drums.

Just occurs to me since some are sharing what their meetings are like - everything I posted was based on non-denom since that's what the OP mentioned (and I realize the "what ours is like" can answer that question as well). I just don't want to misinform. What I described is not an Orthodox Divine Liturgy of course. In most Churches there is a lot of freedom to move around, but our service focuses on prayer, worship through hymns, hearing Scripture, and the preparation and reception of Holy Communion. The sermon is much shorter, and usually about 80-90% of the service is sung or chanted - sometimes even the readings from Scripture. Musical instruments are most often not used, but it depends on the culture (our Greek Church in America uses an organ, African Churches often use drums - but it is NOT a musical performance, nor a lot of listening to talking). So ours are quite different from most non-denoms and many various denominations. Just didn't want to cause any confusion or mislead.

How do you walk int a church? Put one foot in front of the other and go in.

Church attendance is dropping so it is for the church to make people feel welcome and comformtable. just be yourself, ask any questions you want to ask and if you dont feel it is the right place dont go back. I dont often visit churches I havent been to before but have on at least one occassion got up and walkd out half way through the service as I didnt agree with the teaching.

I prefer the Catholic service (Mass) because I feel the Father and the Son are worshipped in a wonderful way, the Bible is read and explained, I like the Nicene Creed and of course communion.

That's my preference but I don't think everyone should have to be Catholic.

Messianic_Friend said:

Title says it all!

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Don't be nervous about walking in by yourself. If it's a bible believing God honouring church then you'll receive a sincere welcome! God Bless

Messianic_Friend said:

Thanks for the replies everyone! Sorry if this is a dumb question, but how do you make friends at a church if you mostly sit and listen? I don't have any friends in the states since I moved from Israel and hope to connect with people at my local church.

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Either before or after the service you should get the opportunity to talk to some of the members. Most churches have Bible classes before the service and this is a good time to relate to people who you are and what you are looking for.

You sound serious about this so I would call the pastor and make an appointment to see him and ask him all the questions you want. Tell him what you feel you need.

It also sounds like the Holy Spirit is very possibly moving in you to seek out a local church. If so you should definitely pray about it and do it.

When I visit a new church, I simply call and ask permission, usually they see this as sincere and will set someone up as a "guide". Someone to help with questions and differences in worship.

Walk in and do a little moonwalk, and be like, "What's up people of the most High, I've come to join in the celebration!" Hire a choir singing "This little light of mine" accompanied with lit candles swaying back and forth, walk behind you as you dance your way to a seat and be like, "I am ready to serve the Lord!!! I'm hungry for the Word! Oooooh Yeaaaah, Praise the Lord!!!" as the choir slowly leaves the sanctuary, turn to your seat mates and be like, "Brother, I'm so happy to shake your blessed hand!" Shake that hand as if it is the last handshake you will ever have!!!!

Messianic_Friend said:

Thanks for the replies everyone! Sorry if this is a dumb question, but how do you make friends at a church if you mostly sit and listen? I don't have any friends in the states since I moved from Israel and hope to connect with people at my local church.

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Many have some kind of fellowship gathering before or most often after the main service. As someone mentioned there may be Bible studies. Many have small group meetings of some kind. It's good to seek out opportunities to help or minister to others.

These are all ways we connect in our Church.

Messianic_Friend said:

Thanks for the replies everyone! Sorry if this is a dumb question, but how do you make friends at a church if you mostly sit and listen? I don't have any friends in the states since I moved from Israel and hope to connect with people at my local church.

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getting into the smaller groups might be a good way to meet people- home fellowship for example. Or by getting involved in a ministry. God Bless

Messianic_Friend said:

Thanks for the replies everyone! Sorry if this is a dumb question, but how do you make friends at a church if you mostly sit and listen? I don't have any friends in the states since I moved from Israel and hope to connect with people at my local church.

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In most services, they have short Bible study sessions before service, in those sessions there usually are fewer people which can give you opportunity to slowly get to know someone. And various ministries you can join to. Another way, is to sit in different locations across the sanctuary so you can slowly introduce yourself to whoever you end up sitting next to. But yeah, there are many ways, it could be difficult sometimes, cause some people seem busy right after service, but as you keep going, people will usually warm up to you.

How to walk into a new church? Arrive late so you don't take someone's pew and get chased out. It happens.

GreekOrthodox said:

Shudders, I've been in one church where they had coffee cup holders in the chairs with a full coffee shop in their fellowship hall. And if you didnt want to be in church, you could sit and watch the service from the coffee shop TV.

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Yeah, there's another church in town where coffee in the sanctuary is a thing; my guess is that the few folks who bring coffee into our sanctuary were used to the way they did it. Not that I will call a church good or bad on the merits of where you can drink your coffee, but it's pretty easy to spill when sitting in regular pews.