How to tell if you are in love, not lust?

[wmpratt]

"Love can't wait to give. Lust can't wait to get."

Selah.

[FONT='Verdana','sans-serif']I like that analogy. [/FONT]

 

[Goodbook]

that's a good one.
'nother question, how can you tell the difference between being just good friends with someone and being in love with someone?
Because being good friends does mean you love them as well.

There must be something about attraction, or does that wear off after you get married?

 

[tbogunro]

What is the difference, what are the signs of love?

Is your heart beating faster mean you are in love when you think about this person or is it lust?

What about blushing?

Or dreaming about that person? What if this person doesn't know and how can they know? Do you tell them, or is there a secret sign? Help! What if you love them but it seems like they just lust you instead? Is it different for man and women?

Honesty love isn't based on feelings but CHOICE and REAL love doesn't have varying degrees. But lust is more based on feelings. God Himself is love and He CHOOSED to love us which means no matter what we do He's going to continually love us. Can you imagine if love was based on feelings? God will love us one day and hate us another lol. The way humans love isn't real love at all because we go by how we feel rather than choosing. Also we love others more than some which also isn't REAL love. The love you have for your wife should ideally be the same with EVERYBODY but the ONLY difference is you CHOOSE to be with her. So when it comes down to love or someone only having lust towards you, it doesn't matter as long as you CHOOSE to love them like God loves them, which means it doesn't matter how they feel about you or do to you. When it comes to a potential wife, just know if you leave it to God you won't worry about her loving you because if God joins you two together, no one can split it apart (Mark 10:9 and Matthew 19:6)

 

[DiscipleHeLovesToo]

that's a good one.
'nother question, how can you tell the difference between being just good friends with someone and being in love with someone?
Because being good friends does mean you love them as well.

There must be something about attraction, or does that wear off after you get married?

you must learn to be led by God; He knows the difference.

if you spend enough time with any human, you will find an opportunity to question whether or not you love them; this is why it's so important to make God your first true love, and learn to hear His leading and follow it without question (a goal you can always get closer to but likely will never completely reach in this life )

 

[Goodbook]

hmm ok, well, how many potentials do christians need to get through until they meet their mate?
because all my previous bf had been a waste of time then. I don't understand the point of it. And I did choose to love them, even if they didn't love me back.

 

[Goodbook]

Some scripture would be helpful, all I seem to be reading is song of Solomon. And that doesn't help me any, because there is no one.

 

[Goodbook]

I mean, except Jesus of course.

 

[gene4435]

If that person had nothing to offer would you still "love" them?

 

[Goodbook]

no. they would have pity instead. Or compassion, or charity.

why do you put love in ""?

 

[Eloy]

What is the difference, what are the signs of love?

Is your heart beating faster mean you are in love when you think about this person or is it lust?

What about blushing?

Or dreaming about that person? What if this person doesn't know and how can they know? Do you tell them, or is there a secret sign? Help! What if you love them but it seems like they just lust you instead? Is it different for man and women?

Love is caring about another person, whereas lust is thinking about having carnal sex with them. For example you can love a person who helps you with something you need, but that wholesome and healthy feeling for them is not the same as wanting to jump on top of them in order to make physical passion with them.

 

[Goodbook]

so husband and wife do not have carnal sex then? What do they have...spiritual sex?
I'm not sure I follow because I'm sure some married christians lust after each other.

 

[asiyreh]

Heb 13:4 Marriage is honourable in all, and the bed undefiled: but whoremongers and adulterers God will judge.

 

[Meadows1024]

You want to follow God's peace. Is there a check in your spirit? Is this a Godly relationship? Do you have physical boundaries set? Take your time, and let God lead you.

 

[Evenios]

to be honest i think a lot of people, young people surcome to lust over love. The big question is what attracts you to the person in the first place.

Is it their body? I have a disability and i cannot smile or frown and have a speech impediment and i find often today that makes me sad is that a lot of young people the first "real" reason they fall for each other i think really is lust. Its the body. for a women its usually falling for the "cute guy with a nice body" and for the man its usually for a curvy woman who is very attractive and often wears tight, low cut, form fitting clothes.

Even us christians i see sometimes in church can wear things that can lead to lust and you have to be careful about that. When you meet someone its ok to like someone who is attractive but make sure you are liking them for who they are on the inside the most. the heart matters most.
thats the nice thing about the internet though instead of worrying about outward apparence you can focus on the heart .

just some thoughts.

 

[Goodbook]

what is a whoremonger?
How can you tell if someone is a whoremonger or adulterer? Can you tell before you even meet them so you can avoid them?

I'm not interested in bodies, I find voice to be most important, like I couldn't stand it if my future husband just mumbled or cursed all the time etc.