How to forgive...

[JGG]

xx

 

[Tigger45]

I agree to some extent to what the video presents but there is a tougher level of forgiveness to attend to and that's when you can't ever see yourself doing what the other person did to you but forgiving them anyway.

 

[GracetotheHumble]

Video seems like a lot of fluff.

Christ addressed forgiveness in the scriptures. He said, "Father forgive them" concerning those who were crucifying him. He taught that we should forgive our brother seventy times seven.

 

[paul1149]

I didn't watch the whole video, but the premise that we would do what others do had we walked in their shoes does not always hold true. We have a choice in the matter, and at some point are accountable.

A more powerful dynamic of forgiveness comes from realizing how great the Father's mercy is toward us, and how much He had to overlook in order to send Jesus to die for our sake.

God was in Christ, reconciling the world to Himself, not imputing their sins against them.
And Jesus said, “Father, forgive them, for they know not what they do.” And they cast lots to divide his garments. -Luke 23:34
And whenever you stand praying, forgive, if you have anything against anyone, so that your Father also who is in heaven may forgive you your trespasses.” -Mark 11:25
Be kind to one another, tenderhearted, forgiving one another, as God in Christ forgave you. -Eph 4:32
We love because he first loved us. -1John 4:19
​

When we see how much God has forgiven us, then it becomes very clear that we must release others in the same way. That doesn't mean we're reconciled to evildoers. As with us and the Lord, in that the door of reconciliation is open to us but we must walk through it, so too those who have offended us must repent if they want restored relationship. Hopefully they will, but at the very least, forgiveness, which literally means sending away (the offense), frees us.

 

[FlyingTurtle]

Video not working for me, probably because of the device I'm using.

How to forgive? That can be hard. Even many Christians need to learn how to forgive. I would like to say something like "rely on the grace of God to strengthen you to forgive" but I dunno if you're Christian or not or if that advice would mean anything to you...

So how about this. If it was someone you loved who you need to forgive, reassure and convince yourself that no matter what s/he does would not cause you to love him/her any less. Everyone makes mistakes but if that mistake was done by someone close to you, convince yourself that love is greater than mistakes.

Another thing is behavioral modification. Nothing helps us get over unforgiveness like doing things for the benefit of those who betray us. I dunno how you feel about prayer, but perhaps try this: from now on, whenever you think about the person you cannot forgive, pray for their wellbeing and happiness. And only that, nothing bad. It works for me... it's very, very hard to hold grudges on someone when you keep praying for good things for them. Behavioral modification. Let your actions change your heart.

 

[orangeness365]

I'm not really one to talk about forgiveness, because it has been so hard for me, but here it goes. I was bullied a lot by a lot of people growing up through school, but I didn't really forgive them until middle school and high school were over. I couldn't do it until I didn't have to see them anymore, and then I wonder if it was more like repressing harmful urges while going to school and then forgetting about it once it was all over. I've struggled with forgiving my mom the most. I thought I had a dream where God told me to forgive her and ask for her forgiveness back when I was in high school, and at first after the dream I did, but then the resentment came back and she kept doing things that I took offense at. It's been 7 years after high school, and I've finally forgiven her (I think?), and we've been reconciled because she apologized once. Sometimes I feel the resentment welling up, but then I remember that I have many of my own sins, too many to count, and if I want to be forgiven by God I'm going to have to forgive other people, including my mother. Plus, I feel bad, because I sinned against her by gossiped about her anonymously about her on the internet, especially on this site, so I feel like I didn't fully forgive her, but sought out a certain amount of revenge, which I shouldn't have done.

 

[ToBeLoved]

The best way I've found is praying for them, which is what is Biblical.

At first I don't say much, it's like "Lord grant them peace and health in their lives" or something very simple. As time goes by, I add a little more.

Luke 6:27-28
"But I say to you who hear, love your enemies, do good to those who hate you, 28 bless those who curse you, pray for those who mistreat you."

If at first you feel insincere, just ask God to help you become more sincere and then pray for them anyways. It does work

 

[Troy Rambo]

Ive been reading this book called "The Bait of Satan" by John Bevere. This book is all about the trap of offense and unforgiveness. About half-way through this book I forgave every single person whom I perceived to have hurt me throughout my life. And boy did I start feeling much better.

 

[Trichakra]

Video is not working for me.

 

[ToBeLoved]

I didn't watch the whole video, but the premise that we would do what others do had we walked in their shoes does not always hold true. We have a choice in the matter, and at some point are accountable.

A more powerful dynamic of forgiveness comes from realizing how great the Father's mercy is toward us, and how much He had to overlook in order to send Jesus to die for our sake.

God was in Christ, reconciling the world to Himself, not imputing their sins against them.
And Jesus said, “Father, forgive them, for they know not what they do.” And they cast lots to divide his garments. -Luke 23:34
And whenever you stand praying, forgive, if you have anything against anyone, so that your Father also who is in heaven may forgive you your trespasses.” -Mark 11:25
Be kind to one another, tenderhearted, forgiving one another, as God in Christ forgave you. -Eph 4:32
We love because he first loved us. -1John 4:19
​

When we see how much God has forgiven us, then it becomes very clear that we must release others in the same way. That doesn't mean we're reconciled to evildoers. As with us and the Lord, in that the door of reconciliation is open to us but we must walk through it, so too those who have offended us must repent if they want restored relationship. Hopefully they will, but at the very least, forgiveness, which literally means sending away (the offense), frees us.

Correct. Vengence is mine saith the Lord.

The lord is the only one that should be avenging any sin, not us. We must forgive and give it to God who is righteous and just and knows the heart of each and every man.

 

[ToBeLoved]

Ive been reading this book called "The Bait of Satan" by John Bevere. This book is all about the trap of offense and unforgiveness. About half-way through this book I forgave every single person whom I perceived to have hurt me throughout my life. And boy did I start feeling much better.

Sounds like a good book, I might pick it up. I'm having an issue forgiving someone totally, a little resistance still remains.

Ended up picking up another one of his books; The Holy Spirit too!