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How to Deal With Horniness as a Christian? What to Do?

FaithfulServant

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Solider of Christ -

I don't think the fact that men have more of a problem with pornography is attributed to the fact that they are more "physical". It is because most men are more "visual".

However, I do agree that the percentage of men with a higher sex drive tends to be higher then the percentage of women. If you just look around on Christian forums, way more men seek advice about a spouse who doesn't show physical love. Couples just have to find a good compromise that will make both people happy.

God Bless,

Steffani
 
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Living4Him03

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Ugh this thread is so over lol I think the op has gotten some good advice. c'mon now ya'll. I'm tired of arrogant men trying acting as though they are the smartest man in the world and know everything. Only God knows everything. Please have a piece of humble pie.
 
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SoldierofChrist

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Ugh this thread is so over lol I think the op has gotten some good advice. c'mon now ya'll. I'm tired of arrogant men trying acting as though they are the smartest man in the world and know everything. Only God knows everything. Please have a piece of humble pie.
It's not even worth responding to this. I never claimed I know everything, I'm sorry for offering my opinion on behalf of men being that I am a MAN. Go figure. This is a politically correct attitude from within the church. I thought Christians avoided such nonsense? Apparently not.
 
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Living4Him03

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It just frustrates me when guys get on these threads and instead of sticking to the oringinal post it seems they must prove their manhood by getting into an argument with another poster. If you want to do that, pm someone. You are the one implying you know everything about not only men, but women as well. Just because you are a man does not make you an expert on the male species. Give ME a break.
 
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SoldierofChrist

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It just frustrates me when guys get on these threads and instead of sticking to the oringinal post it seems they must prove their manhood by getting into an argument with another poster. If you want to do that, pm someone. You are the one implying you know everything about not only men, but women as well. Just because you are a man does not make you an expert on the male species. Give ME a break.
I did not imply such things. If I'm not mistaken, I did address the original post. It's funny how when people go to the Bible they get thrashed. I said people should get married if they are burning with passion (ie: horny, aroused, etc...) instead of complaining about it. If they are progressing towards marriage, then good... there are ways to address that. The argument just went from there and we got into this male-female difference thing and all I was trying to say is that men tend to have higher drives than women and that the man needs to take initiative due to his desire especially which again, tends to be higher, get engaged and get married. That's it. I wasn't claiming that my knowledge on par with God, or that I'm more intelligent than all males, or anything. I'm not an expert and never claimed to be. I live with men and I am one. Imagine that.
 
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SoldierofChrist

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I don't think the fact that men have more of a problem with pornography is attributed to the fact that they are more "physical". It is because most men are more "visual".
I agree. I completely left that out. That is what I meant... the visual aspect is due to a desire for physical contact. Good point.
 
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Peculiarone

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Ringu said:
2 Peculiarone:
The original question of this thread is not a good one. See my post above.

See, things you say you try to do are physical attempts to fight a spiritual issue. You can't do that possibly, it's not gonna work.
Hmm I see what you are saying but it was a straight forward question. What do you do when you are 'aroused"? Horny was used for lack of a better word.

"fight a spiritual issue?" What spiritual issue?
 
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Peculiarone

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SoldierofChrist said:
It doesn't matter. I was just a little confused about your first post as to why you would ask men what they do when they are aroused rather than women.
'man' is something Jamaicans use alot....I was addressing the dear members of CF...not a particular gender.
 
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Peculiarone

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Let it be known to CF and all that have participated in this thread, seperate from all the post mad ein this thread.... I will add.

Thank you for all the advice. I know that this question and their answers will benefit guests, members or whom ever in Christ with the same question/problem.

Know also that there is nothing too hard for God, for he will always make a way of escape.

Shalom....this is the peculiarone :D
 
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justWM

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Peculiarone said:
Sorry for being so abrasive but I am an open minded woman. I have been dating my beau for some time now and I tell you, abstinance is soemthing else. But what do you do when you are horny and he is looking so fine, talking smooth about non-sexual things....just being him....what to do?

I have read books, taken cold showers, beaten the pillows..pray, y'all know..but really what to do when you are horny man?:sigh:
The easiest and most effective is to excuse yourself and come back when you are in control.
 
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SoldierofChrist

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icon12.gif
...



im not married?
Then if you are practicing sex before marriage then you are fornicating. That's another discussion. I would venture to say that if you see no problem with that, you are either biblically ignorant or aren't a believer.

What of the people who are single in the eyes of the State, but have been joined together and are married in the eyes of God?
Again, this is another discussion at another time and has been addressed numerous times in this forum. There is no such thing. The biblical concept is the idea that whatever is normative in the society you live in, whether that is declaration of marriage privately in a one-flesh union and commitment before God, or as in our country, a marriage certificate is what determines who is married and who isn't before God. God set up governments that we would be obedient and "give to Caesar what is Caesar's." It's part of Christian testimony that we humbly obey the government, except in the case of blatant counter-biblical ideas, like, for instance, if it was declared illegal to worship the Christian God. Obviously, God is higher than human government, but it has been set up so that order would be established and maintained.
 
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AngelusSax

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I don't recall Jesus sying "What the State has joined together, let no man put asunder."

Actually, looking through the Bible, a good case can be made that, if you have sex with someone, you're married to them then.

So make sure your first time is with who you're gonna stay with forever.
 
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Sar117

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I think about hilary clinton, forthe women think about george burns.. or Jay Leno. Ha ha, no seriously. Take it from someone that did not wait and regrets it. It comes down to mind over matter. Your mind is not strong enough to resist the temptation. So DONT PUT YOUR SELF IN ANY SITUATION THAT MAKES SEX POSSIBLE. Period, ever. Never. The flesh will win, you will get worn down. Praying is an awsome idea, that works greatbut that take a concious decision to decide to pray. therefore reverting back to the mind over matter thing. Stay away from the possibility and make it impossible to be able to do anyting you should not. As far as not wanting to be turned on by someone...... not to be blunt but grow up, and realize its human nature dont worry about it, do something about it. The more you dwell on the fact your horny the harder it is to resist. just remove yourself completly from the situation. I dont care what age you are if u are having those kinda problems them you need to cool it off. You might think im being a little dramatic and over bearing about this but i was in this boat before. I prayed and i talked to her about it and we worked really hard to fix it but didnt change our habits, the harder we fought it the farther we went everytime. Until we just did it. And now i regret it everyday. not cause i am not a virgin anymore but because i took that from her and her future husband. I stole it, it wasnt mine to have and i took it. I perverted a special thing. Its hard to live with myself sometimes. I know i am forgiven but i see her from time to time and there is a bond of lust between us that will never be broken. It felt like love but it wasnt, it was lust and we gave in. Please dont make the ame mistake i did.
 
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SoldierofChrist

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Actually, looking through the Bible, a good case can be made that, if you have sex with someone, you're married to them then.

So make sure your first time is with who you're gonna stay with forever.
This isn't true as in the case of the Samaritan woman. Jesus encountered her and told her that she has had five "husbands" and the man she has now is not her husband, after she told him she had no husband. (John 4) They weren't married, yet they were clearly living together and having sex. Marriage is a covenant made before witnesses and most importantly, God. It's not something you can simply do in private and simply cross your fingers and hope for the best. Unfortunately you are wrong in saying that having sex makes you married to the person. That's like saying those who are victims of rape are married to the rapist. Sound fair to you? A little sound and biblical exegesis will reveal that sex creates a one-flesh union, but not necessarily marriage. Again, biblically speaking, Jesus attended a traditional wedding in the culture which supports the notion that Jesus saw it as an acceptable marriage.

To simply ignore the "state" as you call it, is setting up some rebellious Christian anarchy, destroying your testimony, and setting yourself up for marital failure.

"Romans 13


Be Subject to Government

1 Every person is to be in subjection to the governing authorities. For there is no authority except from God, and those which exist are established by God.
2 Therefore whoever resists authority has opposed the ordinance of God; and they who have opposed will receive condemnation upon themselves.
3 For rulers are not a cause of fear for good behavior, but for evil. Do you want to have no fear of authority? Do what is good and you will have praise from the same;
4 for it is a minister of God to you for good. But if you do what is evil, be afraid; for it does not bear the sword for nothing; for it is a minister of God, an avenger who brings wrath on the one who practices evil.
5 Therefore it is necessary to be in subjection, not only because of wrath, but also for conscience' sake.
6 For because of this you also pay taxes, for rulers are servants of God, devoting themselves to this very thing.
7 Render to all what is due them: tax to whom tax is due; custom to whom custom; fear to whom fear; honor to whom honor. "

We cannot pick and choose what to obey regarding Scriptural commands, except common sense speaking, if the authority commands that you violate Scripture. It is custom in our country to get married in a ceremony, therefore we have the obligation to do so. This is why common-law isn't a Scriptural idea. Considering the couple isn't considered married until a certain period of time has passed, they are having sex outside of marriage in that instance. I don't see what is so difficult about paying a few bucks to get a license, or having a ceremony with friend's and family. Obedience is the biggest issue here, you can't argue with the above Scripture passage. Testimony is also key.
 
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Ringu

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Peculiarone said:
Hmm I see what you are saying but it was a straight forward question. What do you do when you are 'aroused"? Horny was used for lack of a better word.
"fight a spiritual issue?" What spiritual issue?
I mean, is this all you want to learn? What to do when you are ALREADY horny? If you ask this question on a secular forum, they'd tell you "Are you crazy? Just have an intercourse". As God this question. What do you think he'd tell you? "Go take a cold shower"? "Go for a walk"?... this is silly.
 
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