How to Answer When a Child Asks an Awkward Question

[HeyHomie]

I had a second-grader ask me yesterday, "What's a virgin?" I guess she had read it in her Bible a few verses down from her Sunday School passage or something.

Anyway, I was torn between several options:

1) Answer honestly ("A woman who hasn't had sex.")

2) Give a partially-true answer that leaves out details ("A woman who hasn't been married.")

3) Fob the job off on someone else ("I'm not really the person who should be answering that question for you. That's something that you should ask your parents about.")

What would you do?

 

[pastordavidd]

I would ask where they heard that from (being in second grade, probably wouldn't be a common topic for that age group) and then maybe speak to the parents to see if they want to answer it.
I personally would get the parents to give that answer just so no one can say that I have spoken out of line

 

[Emmaleuk]

I also think that asking the parents what they would prefer you to do is the best option.
I think only being 16 myself, and me having a very young sunday school class, I would avoid the question and definately talk to the parents...though the parents that come to our church are pretty honest with their kids, and the kids who have parents that don't come to the church probably know all about it anyway!

 

[ChrisCountryGirl]

I'd would talk to the parents what she mentioned in class. The best thing to do if another child asks you a question relating to sex is giving a partial answer such as what you explained in your 1st post

 

[Beauty4Ashes]

haha, i don't know what I'd do. The partial answer seems dishonest to me. but thats just IMO. I would either tell them the truth or leave the question for their parents. Most likely refer it to the parents as I wouldn't want to upset a parent.

 

[NicInNC]

Personally, I would tell them that that is something they need to ask their parent(s). I just don't feel that it's my place to discuss that without a parents permission.

 

[shadowderkopnedeyes]

I would do the same as NicInNC , but I would also speak with the parents - so that they are ready for the question.. or they can just make sure that it is answered at thier own time.

 

[Pure_Joy]

tell them that they should remember the question for later, and after class tell them that we can go ask their parents

 

[Robinsegg]

I'd tell the child that I'll try to answer the question next week. Then, speak to the parents, and ask them what they think. Then, having had a week to figure it out, I'd give an answer acceptable to the parents.

Outside that procedure, I'd ask where they saw the reference. Then I'd try to speak to the main point the text was trying to get at.

Rachel

 

[SilverWings]

wow, that's a tough one. I think children that age are often interested in things, without knowing exactly what they are interested in. :-\

So, depending on the personality of the child, I would aim to answer honestly. Or, being that the question is of a sensitive nature, I might actually direct the child to ask his or her parent/s. "Your Mom or Dad might be better at answering that one."

Of course, the child may ask, "Why don't you want to answer it?"

But you can always say, "I just have this feeling your parents will be much better at answering that question. Trust me." lol

 

[Robinsegg]

Another answer to the question of "why don't you want to answer it" is "It's not our topic today."

Rachel

 

[Kitten87]

hhmm yeah tht is a tricky one. At tht age i think thats abit too young to know stuff like that but coz its in the bible its gonna be asked about...i think it should be up to the parents what their child is told.

 

[scraparcs]

Well, make sure you get to the parents as soon as possible. I remember not getting an answer about what adultery meant at about that age, so I just accused people of being adulterers. That did get me an answer...

 

[Brooke4Jesus]

if they were older like 12 i would say tell them the truth but when they are little like second grade they should probably ask there parents... their parents may not appreciate it very much if you tell them somthing they dont want their children to know.

 

[bithiah2]

no one asked me that question but one who was in middle school asked me "what's a ho'?"
i said "a girl who does not carry herself correctly"--there were others in the room and they got it.
to me, that would answer the question and no one could say that i said anything.
if they asked me what a virgin was, i would tell her to ask her mom to explain.
bithiah2

 

[Superchiick]

Hey,,

I think it depends on the age of the child, a kid don't have to know everything. A child of 6 years old or something doesn't have to know what sex is i think. If the kid is like 10 or something you can tell it easier. I would have said something like a women who isn't married on the virgin question because thats how it is supposed to be anyway

Sometimes children ask things you don't know either. I think you should be honoust and tell them you'll think about it because you don't know it either.