How do you know?

[erinm]

you should read His Needs Her Needs: Building an Affair Proof Marriage by Willard F. Harley, Jr. It's a good book and it puts the guy and the girl into perspective. I'm not married, but it was a good read for my boyfriend and I, it's helped us put things into perspective and communicating definately got better.

 

[Warrior Poet]

I am a huge advocate of marring your best friend and treating the person you marry as such. And a big thing that comes to mind is Loyalty:
Faithful to a person, ideal, custom, cause, or duty.
And a great word the Thesaurus brings up: incorruptible.
Incapable of being morally corrupted.
Not subject to corruption or decay.
WAM!!!.
My bestfriend (male) holds my loyalty, I can say that i would die for this man, out of love for him, and everything that we have been through. We have fought and disagreed, even had times where we didnt talk for days, but never once did he let me down, even in the times where we werent close he was the first one there and the last one to leave (though he never truly was gone). If I called him tomorrow cause i needed him he would come i dont doubt that, because we have based our friendship on loaylty. Just like God did for us. He remains loyal no matter what, and I am loyal to him untill the day I die and we meet upstairs.
Marriage is a loyalty to one another. Its a vow, its a promise its a conveint, but those are all based on the loyalty the two people share for one another. There are no conditions to being loyal, no fine print, no reading between the lines, its something you just are. Marriage is a friendship based on trust and love, all centered around loyalty. Sounds just like God and us.

Warrior Poet

 

[LadyBird]

Well I had this huge post typed up but went to delete something and lost it all....boy do I hate computers!!!! SO, I will just say that I believe that until you are officially married you don't know 100% that the perosn you are engaged to (or believe is the one) is the one for you. If this were true that being engaged or being "promised" to one another, then why do some engaged couples break up before their wedding? I mean something could happen and you could break up...that is a slim chance but it still could happen.

 

[JillLars]

Marriage is a loyalty to one another. Its a vow, its a promise its a conveint, but those are all based on the loyalty the two people share for one another. There are no conditions to being loyal, no fine print, no reading between the lines, its something you just are. Marriage is a friendship based on trust and love, all centered around loyalty. Sounds just like God and us.

Great point WP!

If this were true that being engaged or being "promised" to one another, then why do some engaged couples break up before their wedding?

As someone mentioned earlier, people no longer keep their promises, I would argue that this is why couples who are engaged break up. If they were loyal to their significant other, and made a promise to one another then it would not be broken. I think that it is a sad world we live in where we need to have a piece of paper or a ceremony to verify one's promise, I think it is that very attitude that helps contribute to the high divorce rate. I understand the perspectvie because it is hard to believe that there are still people out there who keep their promises, who are loyal to friends and family, but there are people like that out there. Shouldn't we be willing to give people the benefit of the doubt, especially our fellow Chrisitans? Just a thought.

 

[JillLars]

Thanks everyone for your perspectives, this has been a very enlightening thread so far!