How do you cope with..

[gracefaith]

...the fear of miscarriage?

I woke up last night, must have thought about it too much and wound up bursting into tears. I thought I could treat the first 12 weeks like that JR high project where you carry around a chicken egg in a strawberry basket - sort of symbolic rather than actual life, y'know? But now I've started thinking about how the baby is an actual person with a soul and his own life and potential and I'm terrified of miscarrying.

I'm not really sure how to comfort myself. My husband assures me that everything will be fine and that God will take care of it, but it's not like Christian women never miscarry, right? What do you ladies tell yourselves about the risk? Do you just try not to think about it?

 

[Jillymac]

I'm not pregnant, so I don't know if i'm allowed to post here, but I noticed that no one had and i couldn't not post. So sorry if I shouldn't be...

ANYWAY

Gracefaith, I would ask that you pray to God and ask Him to take this fear away right now. It's giving you extra worry that you dont need.
Take authority in the Lord and command that those thoughts leave you. Focus on God and what amazing things He's blessed you with and be thankful.

It's not something you want to concentrate on, yes all women have experienced miscarriages whether Christian or not, but don't focus on the negative. Give thanks for what you've been given and pray protection over you and your baby bump and your family.

I pray that God releases peace over your mind and wraps His protective arms around you and your baby.

 

[gracefaith]

Thanks, Jillymac. I think the pregnancy hormones are just getting to me. I cry a lot.

Hope you are enjoying being a newlywed.

 

[Jillymac]

Better out than in! If you need to cry let it out!

It's nearly our 1st anniversary - can't believe it! (and we're trying for a baby already, our relationship moves fast! - in a good way tho)

Remember focus on what God's blessed you with and always pray - ask Him to balance hormones too!!

 

[Linnis]

It's hard even more so after actually having a miscarriage. I took comfort in the knowledge that any baby miscarried in the first 13 weeks had too many problems to ever grow into a healthy baby. Doesn't mean I didn't pray everyday to ask God to keep my baby safe.

 

[Jillymac]

Just read your post Linnis, i hope what i posted didn't come across that way

Doesn't mean I didn't pray everyday to ask God to keep my baby safe.

Cos that really wasn't what i was alluding too at all. I'm sure you all pray for your babies. I was suggesting to not focus on anything that could go wrong, but instead pray for God's protection etc. and concentrate on your blessings. God has His plan and His will for us all. And your thinking about miscarried babies is a perfectly good one, that even tho they didn't grow to full term here on earth, they'll be full term and perfect in heaven with God.

Hope i didn't offend anyone

 

[RoseofLima]

I think it's a matter of surrender- a resignation that your child's wellbeing is something which you often have very little control over. I don't think that surrender can come any other way than through prayer.

There is always something to be frightened of throughout your child's life... miscarriage, stillbirth, health, SIDS, illness, falling, them being away from you for the first time, driving, college, marriage----- it goes on and on....

I think it can be very overwhelming at first- I know it was for me- because I never had loved anyone the way I loved my son. God really worked on me to prayerfully turn over that fear to Him. It is something with which I still struggle in some ways-- the idea that I am responsible for how they turn out- just is so overwhelming sometimes.... but I know with my heart of hearts that the antidote to my fear is surrendering it to the Lord.

 

[PegasusOnFire]

having been through a m/c like Linnis, I worry about every one of my pregnancies. I have to force myself to lean on God, but hubby is so much better at it then I am. Trust that God will do what is best for the baby he has intrusted you with.

 

[faithingrace]

Gracefaith! Hugs to you! If I could just scoop you up like a child and comfort you right now I would. I know exactly how you feel. Its a horrible torturous normal feeling. I was petrified with my first baby that I would miscarry. I worried constantly. But the other ladies are right... God is in control. I don't worry as much now because my other kids keep me busy and I try not to think about it. Don't beat yourself up about being afraid.. just pray and know you're not alone... and you can always come here for support and friendship. And by the way, I'm on pg #4 and I haven't miscarried yet ever. I know reading the stats can be scary but there are also many women who never miscarry. I pray that I remain one of them. We can pray for each other!

 

[InTheFlame]

After 2 miscarriages I spent a lot of time praying, "Father, thank you for today" ... I didn't and still don't understand why exactly things happened that way, I didn't have much I wanted to ask for or pray about... all I had was a small amount of trust that God knew what he was doing, even if I had no clue what was going on or why.

 

[Beth1231]

I guess I deal with those fears two ways right now. The first is to pray that God will protect my baby when they come and then get busy with something else. The second it when I remember what He specifically told me two months ago...I will bless you with children. I just rest in His promise and choose to take it as a sign that I'll carry baby to full-term. I still a bit every so often, but mostly I'm okay. Gracefaith, my mom suggests that I ask God for a verse for my pregnancy. I have a feeling if you did that and He gave you one, that would bring a lot of comfort as well. *hugs* We're in this thing together.

 

[purpleunicorn_Andi]

I understand the fears as well. my first pregnancy was premature at 31 weeks...you would never know it looking at him now though
second pregnancy the baby died in utero at 9 weeks...
so far things are going well this time arround. I just take things one day at a time....and try to lean on God and trust things will work out.
The misscarriage, acctually had some possitive come out of it... it brought my husband and I back together, and made us both stronger

 

[jessesgirl]

I deal with that fear and cry about that fear ALL the time. All I have found I am able to do is pray about it. People just telling me it will be okay does nothing for me because like you, I know Christian women aren't exempt from miscarriages. Now that I am further along though, my fears have shifted to abnormalities, still-borness, complications and such. It is never ending! I guess it is just true what they say, parents worry no matter what!