Hi, I'm new here. I would like some advice or be pointed towards someone who can help me. My boyfreind and I were together for two and a half years. He was my best friend, my confidante, my companion. I gave everything of myself to him. We started fighting a lot in the last while. About a month ago he broke up with me and is not willing to give us another chance. This has been extremely hard for me to deal with and I have not yet accepted that he doesn't want to be with me. When I pray, all I can pray for is that God will bring us back together. We were really good together and we worked hard on making God central in our relationship. Is it wrong for me to ask God to bring us back together? All I keep thinking of is that He said that we will receive whatever we ask for in faith. I need help. I feel lost and lonely and don't know where to turn. My friends are not religious and he was the only one I could talk to when it came to religious issues. Please help. I want him back in my life and I want to do what is right. Thanks for your time.
-
Starting today August 7th, 2024, in order to post in the Married Couples, Courting Couples, or Singles forums, you will not be allowed to post if you have your Marital status designated as private. Announcements will be made in the respective forums as well but please note that if yours is currently listed as Private, you will need to submit a ticket in the Support Area to have yours changed.
-
CF has always been a site that welcomes people from different backgrounds and beliefs to participate in discussion and even debate. That is the nature of its ministry. In view of recent events emotions are running very high. We need to remind people of some basic principles in debating on this site. We need to be civil when we express differences in opinion. No personal attacks. Avoid you, your statements. Don't characterize an entire political party with comparisons to Fascism or Communism or other extreme movements that committed atrocities. CF is not the place for broad brush or blanket statements about groups and political parties. Put the broad brushes and blankets away when you come to CF, better yet, put them in the incinerator. Debate had no place for them. We need to remember that people that commit acts of violence represent themselves or a small extreme faction.
How do I go on?
- Thread starter kerryvdw
- Start date
JulesM
UK Female
Hi Kerry
Welcome to the forum. There are loads of great folks here who will be able to pray for you and give you advise.
First I'm really sorry for your heartbreaking situation. I'm really feeling your pain.
I too have had long term loving relationships break up and its been very very hard to deal with.
All I can advise is that you keep trusting in Gods plan. He has a plan for you, and knows what's best for you (which may or may not include your ex). God hears your prayers and sees your heart state. He knows you. Whatever He has in store for you will be far more amazing than you could ever imagine. I know when things I really wanted (or loved) had been taken from me it seemed like the end of life as I knew it, and then God turned my life around so that the blessings I received were way better than when I was in my previous situation.
Time will heal the initial pain that you feel (I know its cliche but I also know it to be true), try throwing yourself into your church life more and hanging out with friends - maybe try to make friends with some girls your age in church?
There's nothing to say that this guy and you won't get back together, but it is also a possibility that its Gods will you're not. Best thing is to give Him and the relationship up to God - put it on the altar - totally let go and see if God gives it back to you or if He takes you elsewhere... a bit like Abraham and Issac, Abraham put his son on the altar because God told him to (I bet you he def didn't want to do that), but the miracle was that because God saw his obedience and willingness to let go of those most dear just for his love of God, God spared Issacs life and gave him back to Issac.
I did this over a boyf I had - I prayed it, and symbolically drew the altar and wrote my boyf name on it. God never gave him back to me, but my life certainly ramped up a few notches - I found myself on a mission in Africa a few months later and it was the most exciting time of growth my whole life so far!
I hope I've managed to encourage you and not make you feel any worse.
In love
Jules
Welcome to the forum. There are loads of great folks here who will be able to pray for you and give you advise.
First I'm really sorry for your heartbreaking situation. I'm really feeling your pain.
I too have had long term loving relationships break up and its been very very hard to deal with.
All I can advise is that you keep trusting in Gods plan. He has a plan for you, and knows what's best for you (which may or may not include your ex). God hears your prayers and sees your heart state. He knows you. Whatever He has in store for you will be far more amazing than you could ever imagine. I know when things I really wanted (or loved) had been taken from me it seemed like the end of life as I knew it, and then God turned my life around so that the blessings I received were way better than when I was in my previous situation.
Time will heal the initial pain that you feel (I know its cliche but I also know it to be true), try throwing yourself into your church life more and hanging out with friends - maybe try to make friends with some girls your age in church?
There's nothing to say that this guy and you won't get back together, but it is also a possibility that its Gods will you're not. Best thing is to give Him and the relationship up to God - put it on the altar - totally let go and see if God gives it back to you or if He takes you elsewhere... a bit like Abraham and Issac, Abraham put his son on the altar because God told him to (I bet you he def didn't want to do that), but the miracle was that because God saw his obedience and willingness to let go of those most dear just for his love of God, God spared Issacs life and gave him back to Issac.
I did this over a boyf I had - I prayed it, and symbolically drew the altar and wrote my boyf name on it. God never gave him back to me, but my life certainly ramped up a few notches - I found myself on a mission in Africa a few months later and it was the most exciting time of growth my whole life so far!
I hope I've managed to encourage you and not make you feel any worse.
In love
Jules
Upvote
0
lady_of_god
Well-Known Member
Hi Kerry,
I actually went through something similiar to what happened to you about a year ago today.
I can assure you that things will get better. It doesn't appear this way (and might not for a long time) but it does improve.
Is it selfish that you ask the Lord to bring you two back together? Its not, but you should include in your prayer "Lord let your will be done". Why do i say this? Remember:"And he said, Abba, Father, all things [are] possible unto thee; take away this cup from me: nevertheless not what I will, but what thou wilt." Mark14:26. When Jesus prayed he ask for what he wanted but only if it was in God's Will. Sometimes what we want for ourselves is not what the Lord really intends for us... By the way i've prayed the exact same prayer you said to God.
Sometimes the Lord has you break apart so that you can work on some things necessary in your life. For me, the Lord need for me to build a stronger relationship with Him, it wasn't enough that my ex-bf was strong with the Lord but I had to be. The Lord gave me baptism of the Holy Spirit just this passed October, He has shown me how to have faith, and He is making my relationship with my ex how it should be. We are not back together yet, but we are building a new foundation for what could be marriage later on down the road.
If you need to talk to somone personally on the matter you can send me a private message. I'm here if you need someone who understands.
-Lady
I actually went through something similiar to what happened to you about a year ago today.
I can assure you that things will get better. It doesn't appear this way (and might not for a long time) but it does improve.
Is it selfish that you ask the Lord to bring you two back together? Its not, but you should include in your prayer "Lord let your will be done". Why do i say this? Remember:"And he said, Abba, Father, all things [are] possible unto thee; take away this cup from me: nevertheless not what I will, but what thou wilt." Mark14:26. When Jesus prayed he ask for what he wanted but only if it was in God's Will. Sometimes what we want for ourselves is not what the Lord really intends for us... By the way i've prayed the exact same prayer you said to God.
Sometimes the Lord has you break apart so that you can work on some things necessary in your life. For me, the Lord need for me to build a stronger relationship with Him, it wasn't enough that my ex-bf was strong with the Lord but I had to be. The Lord gave me baptism of the Holy Spirit just this passed October, He has shown me how to have faith, and He is making my relationship with my ex how it should be. We are not back together yet, but we are building a new foundation for what could be marriage later on down the road.
If you need to talk to somone personally on the matter you can send me a private message. I'm here if you need someone who understands.
-Lady
Upvote
0
lady_of_god said:
I completely agree with this.
Even though you are hurting, there may be a deeper meaning.
Anything that happens to you in this life that you wish had not, those things are all part of the plan.
For now it may be helpful to take up a new hobby. If you have pets, do something very special for them. Or something for a loved one.
You have to make yourself happy inside before you can truly be happy with someone else. If you had been fighting then maybe something was wrong. Also think of him. Maybe he needs some time. In the end I think that what should happen, will.
Upvote
0
Hi everyone
Thank you for all your responses. It is nice to see that there are people that care and that have been through the same thing. It is going a bit better with me now. Since I put my first post in I have felt a kind of peace in my heart. It really feels like people have been praying for me. Don't get me wrong, I still miss him immensly and think about him all the time but I think I'm going through an important change: I feel that my focus is shifting from my ex to God. Previously my prayers were all about getting back together with him, nothing else and now its different...Once again thanks to everyone. Its good to see how God's children stand together and support one another. Thank you all and God bless.
Thank you for all your responses. It is nice to see that there are people that care and that have been through the same thing. It is going a bit better with me now. Since I put my first post in I have felt a kind of peace in my heart. It really feels like people have been praying for me. Don't get me wrong, I still miss him immensly and think about him all the time but I think I'm going through an important change: I feel that my focus is shifting from my ex to God. Previously my prayers were all about getting back together with him, nothing else and now its different...Once again thanks to everyone. Its good to see how God's children stand together and support one another. Thank you all and God bless.
Upvote
0
MagicStar723
Well-Known Member
{{{HUGS}}} I will be praying for you!
I don't have any advice but I can offer you my prayers.
I don't have any advice but I can offer you my prayers.
Upvote
0
KristianJ
What's in a name? Letters...
Kerry, the others have given sound advice - the most right thing to do here is to say to God "Let your will be done for me", because whatever He has planned for you will be for your benefit and growth as one of His children. Although I can imagine you will be feeling heaps of pain, hurt and disappointment (I went through a similar situation a month or 2 ago and know what it's like), this has happened for a reason. If you read the beginning of Romans 5, I think it'll encourage you that out of situations like this can come an outpouring of renewed hope and faith in the power of the promises of God. And if His will is for you and your ex to be reconciled, then it will happen. But for now, trust Him who holds your life in His hand and knows what path you will go down in the future. It will be the best one for you 
God bless
God bless
Upvote
0
traingosorry
I'm what Willis was talkin' bout.
Lady of God made a huge point in that God may have separated the two of you because He has something bigger planned for you and it cannot happen with your ex in your life because your focus was on him or for other reasons.
I know it is a hard thing to do, but remember this and be excited that God has something coming your way!!
I know it is a hard thing to do, but remember this and be excited that God has something coming your way!!
Upvote
0
Similar threads
