I am not sure if this is the correct area to post this but I thought some would be able to relate. I first got depression and anxiety when I was 13 mostly because of bullying. The emotional bullying was tolerable, but the physical bullying really opened my eyes to the hate they had towards me and it truly depresses me. If they felt remorse and asked for forgiveness I would be able to forgive them, but I can't just forgive them when they don't care about what they have done. I know God forgave me through irresistible grace when I did not deserve it, but as hard as I try I can't give that kind of forgiveness towards the bullies. I have tried using a therapy that I used to use for ptsd which involves exchanging a negative memory with a positive one (looking on the bright side in others words), and that does help but the effects are still there. What I'm trying to say is I think they have done permanent damage that I cannot undue which means I cannot forgive them. I think this angers God since He wants me to forgive others as He has forgiven me. How can I forgive them? It's too bad we can't just sleep and drink all day to forget the past. I realize that I am seeing the glass half empty, since I have dozens of positive memories, but I can't help but feel affected by the negative ones. I used to have bad coping mechanisms and I would use alcohol and laughter to deal with it but now that I'm a Christian I don't want to do that. I have always had a problem of suppressing my issues and then it resurfaces and causes depression and anxiety. If I could start resolving these issues correctly I would be much more at peace, and I think forgiveness is the only way to do so.
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How do I forgive
- Thread starter J0SHUA
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You are right forgiving the perpetrators is essential because we want to build our new psyche with love and in love.
Jesus was the first one who advised us to love our enemies and showed us how far to go doing that.
What I found really helpful forgiving my attackers, was the realisation that they would have never wanted to cast so much bad life onto me as they had done,(or were responsible for.) It was supposed to be a little fun which ran badly out of hand and now they had wrecked my life.
Battle on dear struggler it is worthwhile to forgive those who have wronged you. At least you prove to be the better man in all this. It is the best way to get even with them.
Jesus was the first one who advised us to love our enemies and showed us how far to go doing that.
What I found really helpful forgiving my attackers, was the realisation that they would have never wanted to cast so much bad life onto me as they had done,(or were responsible for.) It was supposed to be a little fun which ran badly out of hand and now they had wrecked my life.
- Forgiveness heals the wounds for it draws the poison out of the sores!
- Forgiveness is just as much about you as it is about the offenders.
- Forgiveness can be really hard to do!
- Forgiveness deactivates the wrong done to us within our hearts and sets us free.
- Forgiveness is from God and needs to be asked for.
Battle on dear struggler it is worthwhile to forgive those who have wronged you. At least you prove to be the better man in all this. It is the best way to get even with them.
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Thanks Jeshu. Those are good points. I'm hoping God will help me but I think He is angry at me. I'm struggling with sin too much.
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Be of good courage, those who struggle with sin God loves, doing different then you are is no easy feat! He greatly delights in those who gladly do right.
Grace dear brother, cover everything under God's grace. A guilty conscience, from where the accuser rules us, can't beat God's grace! Let Thankful joy ring from your heart instead! A heart where love for God and neighbour is growing. A heart where God can come to dwell
You know the best way to escape your destiny when you have fallen is to go to God and confess your sins to Him. Don't promise you will never do it again, or begin the killing fields, but await and see if you will go to God when you have fallen and let His loving light set you free!
God is awesome at making wrong right
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Thanks, were you bullied Jeshu? I thought it'd be common here. It's very common over at myptsd.
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Hi. I have had problems with forgiving those who have harmed me and there has been a lot of harm done to me in my life. I went through counseling and stages. I found I had to express my hurt and anger before I was able to forgive. There are lots of way to express feelings besides negative ways. Please ask Jesus to guide you and help you to reach the stage of forgiveness and he will. I will be praying for you brother.
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LoyalToGod
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hi joshua, just letting you know that you have my support as well. Here's an interesting link regarding forgiveness (hope it helps)
Forgiving and Forgetting, Freedom from the Past: Jesus said, "Peace be with you! As the Father has sent me, I am sending you." And with that he breathed on them and said, "Receive the Holy Spirit. If you forgive anyone his sins, they are forgiven; if
Forgiving and Forgetting, Freedom from the Past: Jesus said, "Peace be with you! As the Father has sent me, I am sending you." And with that he breathed on them and said, "Receive the Holy Spirit. If you forgive anyone his sins, they are forgiven; if
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Thanks Loyal. That webpage helped a little bit. But wouldn't true forgiveness mean that all my depression from what they did would be gone? How can I just force myself to feel better?
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miss-a
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I can so relate to that feeling. But here's how I see it. Hypothetically, if you accidentally backed over me with your car and broke my legs, I can forgive you quickly, but it will still take time for my legs to heal. And I will need to be under the care of a doctor and need a cast and rest and time in order to fully heal.
You need to bring these wounds again and again to the Great Physician Jesus. Ask Him into every part of that experience, over and over again. Tell Him your feelings and just keep talking to Him. It's all about relationship with Him. That is how we heal. He is faithful.
Not sure if I posted this for you before, but here it is and it will help you. Freedom from Depression - YouTube
Prayers,
a
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