How did you adjust once the honeymoon phase ended?

[ImAllLikeOkWaitWat]

I know this could be like the real test of a relationship. I'm wondering what type of difficulties that occurred once those lovey dovey feelings lowered and your happiness levels returned to the level they were before marriage. And any advice you could give on how you dealt with it.

 

[JIMINZ]

Coming to 13 yrs in Dec. and the Honeymoon isn't over yet!
We have an 11 yr. old Daughter and a 7 mo. old Daughter

Don't let those levels return to what they were before Marriage.

Eph 5:25,31
25) Husbands, love your wives, even as Christ also loved the church, and gave himself for it;
26) That he might sanctify and cleanse it with the washing of water by the word,
27) That he might present it to himself a glorious church, not having spot, or wrinkle, or any such thing; but that it should be holy and without blemish.
28) So ought men to love their wives as their own bodies. He that loveth his wife loveth himself.
29) For no man ever yet hated his own flesh; but nourisheth and cherisheth it, even as the Lord the church:
30) For we are members of his body, of his flesh, and of his bones.
31) For this cause shall a man leave his father and mother, and shall be joined unto his wife, and they two shall be one flesh.

 

[Tolworth John]

Love is constantly changing. The excitement, butterflies in tummies, while going on a date, changes to a different excitement as the pair grow in knowledge about each other. So marriage is a changing love.

On a practical note, an extra pair of feet in the bed was a shock, always in the way!

None of us are perfect, as we talk and listen to each other so we refine our relationship.

You might spend a life time fighting the battle of toilet seats and squesing tooth paste only to find once they are settled there is another issue to be resolved.

Communication is key.

 

[SloopidyBoop]

19 years married now.
In some ways it is about focusing on the goal. Stop looking so far ahead that you forget to feel NOW. Just take it one day at a time and keep kissing and holding hands even when you don't want to. Because it's not about you anymore, so stop drowning in your own mind and live by God's word. You will be okay, God loves you both so much, be good kids.

 

[Diamond72]

When does the honey moon end?

 

[Paidiske]

Looking back, I think we could have made the adjustment easier on ourselves if we'd done better with marriage preparation. We realised that we were actually quite different personalities in some ways, and that (for example) what I wanted to do to lower my stress, made him more stressed (and the other way around). If we'd known that going in we could have been intentional about it from the start, rather than having to learn through an awful lot of frustration and angst.

 

[Michie]

When does the honey moon end?

It really doesn’t. It ebbs and flows. The longer you are with someone, love evolves and gets stronger over time. Living in a constant honeymoon phase sounds really exhausting to me. Love is meant to evolve over time. It can’t stay stagnant. Does the honeymoon phase ever end? No but it is not a constant state of the tingles. I think that honeymoon phase is what we initially need to bond and grow together.

 

[Diamond72]

Living in a constant honeymoon phase sounds really exhausting to me.

We spent our honey moon on chung chow island Hong Kong. It is a nice place to visit with lots of shops and stores but I do not think I would want to live there. For one things you have to walk or take a bicycle. They do not allow any vehicles on the island.

 

[Michie]

We spent our honey moon on chung chow island Hong Kong. It is a nice place to visit with lots of shops and stores but I do not think I would want to live there. For one things you have to walk or take a bicycle. They do not allow any vehicles on the island.

Well I was not talking about a destination but day to day life. The honeymoon tends to reappear in the marriage periodically which is a good thing. But the day to day living and contentment is a very nice thing too with the one you love.