I know this is an older post, but the topic is interesting and I would like to give my position on the subject.
I struggle with this also. I understand that the issue is seeing Christ fully as our Lord. The only way a Christian can see Christ fully as Lord is through the revelation of the Holy Spirit. Christ fullness has to be revealed to us, and as we study the gospel, our belief and love for Him increases. This is done through putting on the New Man by the Spirit. It is the Spirit that helpers our infirmities, Romans 8:26, not us.
Also, when we come to Christ, we are GIVEN the Spirit (Holy Spirit), 1 John 4:12. This Spirit is the same Spirit that raised Christ from the dead the dwells in us, Romans 6:10, and we have this Spirit as the earnest of our inheritance (a down payment to our inheritance) to the Kingdom, that is, until our redemption. Therefore, we are to put off the Old Man (where we struggle to do so according to Romans 7), and put on the New Man, Ephesians 4:22).
No man on earth knows how to put on the New Man because it is the Power of God which has made this possible - we have been crucified with Christ and we now walk in newness of life, the New Man. We are to believe what God has said. Our old man has been crucified - a fact. We walk in newness of life - a fact.
Our only struggle is in believing this to be true because the SELF is so use to controlling our lives (Romans 7). But in Christ, we have been set free from the flesh, we must believe this truth, this is the renewing of the mind. Pray for this truth to be revealed to you.
Although you struggle with believing Christ is Lord, and you judge yourself because of it, it doesn't matter. God crucified us on the cross with Christ. Who do you think God crucified? Good people? No, he crucified sinners. And He made us righteous in Christ, not of our making. He did it. So we are already righteous because God Has made Christ to be our righteousness, 1 Corinthians 1:30; we can bring nothing to the table - because we, our flesh, our carnal nature, have been crucified. We are not told to force ourselves to love Jesus, a carnal man cannot do it - Romans 8:7; when we do this this we place ourself under the law of sin because we rouse up our flesh. However, we are given the Spirit of life and Love by the Holy Spirit which enables you to love Jesus, and even our enemies. It's the Spirit that comes with Power to DO, that we cannot do. For God has not given us the spirit of fear, but of Power - 2 Timothy 1:7.
Now most people say, so what do I do then? The answer to that question is: we pray, confess our issues to God, ask for revelation, ask to be given the ability walk according to the Fruit of the Spirit, ask to be given the ability to hear the guidance of the Holy Spirit, ask that we be given the ability to love our enemies, read the gospel, and meditate on God's word. Ask that our inner man be strengthened like Ephesians 3:16. As we do these things, we will be GIVEN the strength we need BY THE SPIRIT. We will see a miraculous change and growth. God will do for you what you cannot do! Philippians 4:13. We are not told to DO, we are told to BELIEVE what has already been done in Christ Jesus. So we ask that those things be manifested in our life. And we know that God will hear our prayer, so we patiently wait for the manifestation of the Power of God to operate in our life. There is no Power but God's Power. We cannot be condemned by no one and no situation, for there is no condemnation in Christ Jesus, Romans 8:1, and even If our heart condemn ourselves, that won't work either, because He is greater than our heart, 1 John 3:20.
The Gospel is our teaching tool to understand how to walk in the New Man that has never been known before, according to Spirit of God in Christ Jesus. We would not have known how to do this, how to live in Christ Jesus. No one does. That's why we have the gospel to teach us, and it is the Power of the Gospel that brings about the Spiritual changes in our lives according to Christ. As it is said in Romans 16:25,
Now to him that is of power to establish you according to my gospel, and the preaching of Jesus Christ, according to the revelation of the mystery, which was kept secrete since the world began.