I suggest you study Romans, John, I, II, and III John, etc. and hear what the Spirit says on the matter, not your own reasoning. Our will is either submitted to the will of Christ or to our own sinful passions. Those are our choices. Again, where and what is free will? Show me in Scripture.
"This day I call heaven and earth as witnesses against you that I have set before you life and death, blessings and curses. Now
choose life, so that you and your children may live and that you may love the LORD your God, listen to his voice, and hold fast to him..." Deut. 30:19, 20a
"...if serving the LORD seems undesirable to you, then
choose for yourselves this day
whom you will serve, whether the gods your forefathers served beyond the River, or the gods of the Amorites, in whose land you are living. But as for me and my household, we will serve the LORD." Josh. 24:15
"Don't you know that when you offer yourselves to someone to obey him as slaves, you are slaves to the one whom you obey--whether you are slaves to sin, which leads to death, or to obedience, which leads to righteousness...?
Just as you used to offer the parts of your body in slavery to impurity and to ever-increasing wickedness, so
now offer them in slavery to righteousness leading to holiness." Rom. 6:16, 19
"Therefore, I urge you, brothers, in view of God's mercy, to
offer your bodies as living sacrifices, holy and pleasing to God--this is your spiritual act of worship. Do not conform any longer to the pattern of this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind. Then you will be able to test and approve what God's will is--his good, pleasing and perfect will." Rom. 12:1, 2
The Bible is pretty clear that we get to
choose which master we will surrender to. Jesus, in John 15; Paul, in Romans 6 (and elsewhere); and Ezekiel (33:12-16), among others, make it clear that it's an ongoing/daily
choice. But, in your defense (when we choose God), He blesses/graces/empowers that choice.