Him changing his name

[~Lynz~]

hello married ppl.

I would just like to as what do you think of the guy change his name to he womens name instead of her changing to his.


me and my man are thinking about doing this. i have 2 kids from perivous relationship and they both have my maiden name and i would not want to change their names and i would not want to have a diferent surname from them and i would want the same as my husband.



do u think it may come accross as disrespectful?


he has said he has no attachment to his surname as it was forced on him when his mum got re married

am i just worrying what will people think to much?

 

[Conservativation]

Yea, Im old fashioned so thats why I dislike it. I knew some guy who he and her hyphenated both names, reversed to each other, so they had the same actual names, in different order. And I was not inclined to see that as a good thing....because Im just old fashioned.
Id prefer to go ahead and have the different name from the kids, or the different name from the husband, but leave husbands name alone. Its kind of the traditional anchor in the family tree in OUR culture, yea I know there are matriarchal cultures, but rarely

 

[Steffenfield]

If I ever marry again, I'm definitely taking my spouses name.

No question.

And yeah, there's nothing wrong with this.

 

[Conservativation]

why?

Sitting aside wrong right indifferent...you seem to have a strong pre planned preference


why?

 

[Steffenfield]

My current gf has a strong family name and they all are super millionaires.

We've already talked about it, and yeah, I have no problem with this.

 

[Hipsterz]

Like one of my friends says, "Its a woman's world."

 

[Mayzoo]

If you and your fiance have no issue with I would not worry about what others think too much. All your new friends will not know the difference anyway.

I think it is fine, and it is the norm in some cultures.

 

[waxlion10]

What Mayzoo said.

 

[Lilymay]

If your husband is fine with changing his surname, I would say that is not disrespectful. And as long as husband does not mind, you should not let what other people think bother you.

My personal preference is the woman takes the man's surname, but I don't judge people who don't.

Changing mine was easy. My maiden name had four letters, the first, second, third, (inserted 3 more letters to create husbands surname), than the fourth. Basically just added a syllable...lol.

 

[FaithPrevails]

Agree with mayzoo and Lily.

 

[Luther073082]

If your husband is fine with changing his surname, I would say that is not disrespectful. And as long as husband does not mind, you should not let what other people think bother you.

My personal preference is the woman takes the man's surname, but I don't judge people who don't.

Changing mine was easy. My maiden name had four letters, the first, second, third, (inserted 3 more letters to create husbands surname), than the fourth. Basically just added a syllable...lol.

I agree, I think if he's ok with it then its fine.

But as a default in most circumstances, I belive the woman should change her last name. Or at least let the kids take the last name of the husband.

 

[MacNeil, D.]

My current gf has a strong family name and they all are super millionaires.

We've already talked about it, and yeah, I have no problem with this.

Does her family mind? Just wondering.

 

[poohgirl]

If your husband is fine with changing his surname, I would say that is not disrespectful. And as long as husband does not mind, you should not let what other people think bother you.

I am a traditionalist, so I took my husbands name.

However, like Lilymay said if your husband is fine with it then I don't see it as a problem. I guess you could call it mutual submission.

 

[Captivated]

I was at school with someone who took his wife's surname on marriage because she was the last of her family with a very rare name and his was pretty common.

I took my husband's surname on marriage 23 years ago but didn't give it much thought at the time. If I was doing it now I might not but it doesn't worry me enough to change it. It's the personal choice of the couple and nobody else's business; it's a custom not a requirement.

I know in the UK that registrars recommend to unmarried parents that they have births of children registered in the mother's name to avoid any complications with potential future relationships, but I imagine that advice is not often followed.

 

[Bro_Sam]

hello married ppl.

I would just like to as what do you think of the guy change his name to he womens name instead of her changing to his.


me and my man are thinking about doing this. i have 2 kids from perivous relationship and they both have my maiden name and i would not want to change their names and i would not want to have a diferent surname from them and i would want the same as my husband.



do u think it may come accross as disrespectful?


he has said he has no attachment to his surname as it was forced on him when his mum got re married

am i just worrying what will people think to much?

The Church submits to Christ. Christ does not submit to the Church.

 

[Conservativation]

The Church submits to Christ. Christ does not submit to the Church.

good luck

 

[Bro_Sam]

I am a traditionalist, so I took my husbands name.

However, like Lilymay said if your husband is fine with it then I don't see it as a problem. I guess you could call it mutual submission.

I think it's great that you did that, but for us Christians, it's about much, much more than just tradition. Marriage symbolizes the relationship between Christ and the Church, Christ represented by the husband, and the Church represented by the wife.

In Christianity, wives take the husbands name as a symbol of the Church's submission to the authority of Christ.

 

[Amanafterherheart]

I would take my wifes name immediately if she thought it was in her heart to give it to me.

 

[Captivated]

Just to add that because it is common practice in some nations doesn't mean it's that way everywhere. There are several countries (Spain, Italy, Belgium ...) where it is not, and has not been, the practice for women to change their name after marriage and her birth name remains her legal name.

Historical evidence indicates that with some notable exceptions (China or the Romans, for instance) surnames didn't appear until the early Middle Ages and even then were not hereditary or family-linked; this process took several hundred years. Interesting stuff.

 

[~Lynz~]

i am a traditionalist sort of person. i want to take my husbands name and then have our children and live happily ever after however thats not the set up we have. the kids are already there.
this is the exact reason i ask... i wouldnt want to appear disrespectful towards my husband, but is not taking his name disrespectful. i will submit to my husband i do all the wife duties that is expected of me. does taking his name matter all that much? it is only a name after all. (and he is not attached to his second name its not his family name it is his ex step fathers)

i would take my to be husbands name in a heartbeat. its a name i like and i personaly like it more than my maiden name.

i dont want to force a new surname on my children they are 5 and 2 yrs old and will be 7 and 4 yrs old when we get married so they will be well old enough to know there surname and as my husband had his surname changed by his step dads arrival he doesnt want to do that to my kids as he hated it when he was a kid and he would have been the same age as my eldest will be.

i dont want to have a different surname from my kids either. my elsest son has already been though a name change as i gave him his fathers name when he was born and changed it when his father left which was before my youngest was born so was able to give him my maiden name when i regestered him.

in scotland under 16 you can only change your name once (you can chnage it again through depol) but really my eldest son cant change his name again untill he is 16.

and finally my other reason is i want the same name as my husband "Mr and Mrs"


so to sum up..
i want the same name as my kids
i dont want to force a new surname on them
i want the same surname as my husband.

it only seams logical.


the only other option i have is to double my surname and have both. but im not sure how legal that is.