Hi! All !

[HollyHobbie]

I am really struggling I am "boarder line " Bi Polar and have been really having a hard time with this lately !!!. I can't seem to fight off the rapid thoughts of suicide or simply taking it out on myself. I am a born again Christian, and I know that God didn't make me to destroy myself and that he has a special plan for me and a calling on my life.

I was just recently put on another medication and my psychiatrist is trying to wean me off !!! . I am back to thinking about doing something to put myself back in the hospital just to protect myself and my precious family !

I know deep down , I could never hurt them but the thoughts are there , I know that God is with me because he's the one thats keeping me somewhat sane right now, I need to stay focused on Gods word but I am having a hard time focusing on anything !
Even this post is taking me a while to write.........Oy !........ The truth is I am scared extreemly scared. I don't understand whats happening to me.

I feel like I'm slowly going insane .

Please pray for me.

Love In Christ
Holly Hobbie
Laura

 

[DLX]

Hey Laura ,


Sounds like you are having a really rough go of things. I think we have a lot in common - from reading your other post. I have an autistic daughter who is 5. I have two more daughters (3 and 1) who are healthy. My daughter's autism isn't severe But it is bad enough. I struggle with feelings of guilt a lot over it. Who knows why.

I also have bipolar disorder. Not a terrible case of it. But one nonetheless. I struggle with severe depression and psychosis when I am at my worst. But it takes a while for me to get there. I am taking a great combination of meds now that seem to work well for me.

I had a really bad case of postpartum depression after my 3rd daughter was born and found myself thinking that it would be better if all of us died. It was a horrible time. When I finally told my Dr that I had been having homicidal and suicidal thoughts, she admitted me to the hospital and got really agressive with my meds. Within a week, I was feeling a lot better. But the memory of those feelings was quite traumatic, as I am sure you can imagine.

I will be praying for you and your precious family tonight. I would love to talk to you a little more, if you would like. You can email me, or I have MSN messenger. Chadr@mts.net and Hephzibite@msn.com

Take care of yourself and stay safe.

Lexi

 

[Alive again]

Praying for you!!!!! And your family! Try to find a Bilbe or Bible verses on tape or cd, just listen. And remember God's Holy Spirit intervenes in our prayers, even when all we can get out is HELP!!!! Know you are loved and supported here. Meds cahnges suck and can be a roller coaster ride. It will get bettere, just keep trying!!! Yes in deed focus on letting God be your strength when you are to weak, ask Him to "take every thought captive" and "to renew your mind with the mind of Christ" when you are to weak to do it yourself!!!! Prayers!

 

[justafayes]

I am really struggling I am "boarder line " Bi Polar and have been really having a hard time with this lately !!!. I can't seem to fight off the rapid thoughts of suicide or simply taking it out on myself. I am a born again Christian, and I know that God didn't make me to destroy myself and that he has a special plan for me and a calling on my life.

I was just recently put on another medication and my psychiatrist is trying to wean me off !!! . I am back to thinking about doing something to put myself back in the hospital just to protect myself and my precious family !

I know deep down , I could never hurt them but the thoughts are there , I know that God is with me because he's the one thats keeping me somewhat sane right now, I need to stay focused on Gods word but I am having a hard time focusing on anything !
Even this post is taking me a while to write.........Oy !........ The truth is I am scared extreemly scared. I don't understand whats happening to me.

I feel like I'm slowly going insane .

Please pray for me.

Love In Christ
Holly Hobbie
Laura

God Bless you Lil Sis...

I know you may think this strange.. but,,, I too was recently diagnosed with BiPolar AND Adult ADHD,,, BUT the strange thing is.... I'm happy about the diagnosis...
because,, now.. I can experience healing and understanding so some day,,, God can use me to support others going through the terrible stuff that is associated with this. I say all to say this,, be encouraged and of good cheer... someday,, God will use you to have compassion on others too... first things first... Be blessed in the Lord and the Power of His might!! Praise him, thank him, and glorify him.. he has a great work in store for you!! God Bless in Jesus Name! Amen.

 

[HeartsnFlowers]

Hi Laura,

I posted on another thread that I have an 8 yr old stepson who has autism. He lives with us full time now, and I have a 9 yr old and an 11 yr old both with ADHD.
How conincidental (?) three of us here with autistic children!

How are you feeling today?

Doula- dont feel guilty about it. You didnt do anything to cause your child's autism.

 

[HollyHobbie]

wow I was a mess when I posted that . Thanks Lexi I will email you soon ! and justaface ! (your more than justaface ! Too God you know and too me ! ) Alive again thanks for the encouragement sometimes scripture is the only thing that keeps me going !

HeartsnFlowers ! thanks I am looking forward to getting to know you more and learning more about your step son !


Thanks all I'm doing better though I am having an extreemly diffucult time remembering things and have been a bit frazzled ,

Love In Christ
Holly Hobbie
Laura