hey everybody im dgoodman im 18 years old and i found christian forums doing research on something ive been struggling with for a long time which is anxiety and ocd i started having awful intrusive thoughts about God about five months ago i felt extremely guilty and terrible about my thoughts and i suffered in silence like most of us do for a long time until i finally decided to do some research and that is where i found this website and from just reading some of the devotionals and responses made me feel so much better knowing that i was not alone in this and that im not the only one who suffers with this!And i hope that maybe someone can read my post and feel the same way,so i want to share some of the things ive learned while dealing with my disorder:firstly your not alone!dont feel like you cant ask God for help to get through this because you can but dont ask him to help you and expect him to do it all.this example might not make sense to most of you but asking God to help you and then expecting him to do it all is like you asking someone to help you build a house and then expecting them to complete the job without any help from you so instead of praying for him to do it all pray for this(and its helped me in more ways than i can explain!) pray for strength,incouragment,for him to guide you and also i know exactly how guilty and ashamed you might feel so pray for comfort.and also dont ever feel like God loves you any less no matter how bad your thoughts may be,he understands you have a disorder and that you cant help it so dont feel bad thats like somebody with cancer feeling bad because they are sick!God knows you he made you and as it says in the bible you are wonderfully and beautifully made so you are not a mistake because God loves you for who you are and for all you are he knew that one day you would need help with this before you did so he was more than prepared to help you=] And another main thing to remember is this:these thoughts are involuntary,unwanted and totally and completely out of your character and also you are not crazy. and its a long road to recovery but well worth the trip so just hang in there and because it just takes alot of time and prayer. have a blessed day and i hope this helps
