He refuses to read ..

[savedgirl10]

My husband says he was baptized at the age of 15, and was raised Catholic prior to that. He says he has been forced to read his bible all through out Catholic school as a child, but he is 46 now. He goes to church with me, however even though he brings his bible, he never once has opened it. I have asked him if he would like to maybe do some devotions or scripture reading with me..he says yes..but then finds excuses to not to. So i just drop it. I don't want him to feel forced into anything, but am I wrong for wanting to have some type of bond through sharing God's word ?
God has healed our marriage, and I am so thankful for that, but I want us to share more than church service on Sunday mornings. I fully believe that we could benefit so much from quiet time in God's word.
I attend a couple of bible studies during the week, and I actually enjoy my devotions and study/reading of my bible. He says my priorities are wrong.
I am not sure what he is expecting....I refuse to give up what I enjoy.

 

[WolfGate]

You start off saying you want him to do bible reading and studies with you.

But later it sounds like he want you to give up the bible studies you are doing yourself and with friends. Is that the real problem?

 

[savedgirl10]

Well...I guess that is part of it.....we have signed up for numerous small groups through church..he goes once then finds excuses not to go anymore...bu I feel that I should finish the studies..so I go by myself. He says it is all well and good that I enjoy them, but that I need to put my priorities in the right order. I never put any of my studies outside the home ahead of my family, but I do not feel I should be asked to quit going just because he does not want to go.

 

[savedgirl10]

Also ... is it true that a person who claims to be a Christian can refuse to read scripture?
Is it necessary to read scripture?

 

[ValleyGal]

I'm curious what he thinks your priorities should be. Home? Imo, learning scripture is about learning how to live - both at home and outside home. So it always starts with scripture. Your growth in faith should be your top priority. After all, your spirit is eternal where your marriage ends when one of you dies. Focus on eternal implications...that does not mean your marriage has no eternal implications because how you apply scripture to your marriage certainly will. We all will be accountable for what we did with Jesus.

 

[Shane R]

These are all challenging questions. It is clear that your spirituality and your husband's spirituality are very different. What you must learn, both of you, is not to impose your own limits and expectations on the other. This is a very personal matter.

That being said, it can be the death of a marriage if you are too far apart. That is one of the reasons my first marriage failed.

The Lord bless you and keep you, make His face shine on you, look on you with favor, and give you His peace.

 

[HannahT]

Sounds like he isn't comfortable with those studies, and using the 'priority' deal as a diversion NOT to speak about it.

You might want to leave that subject alone for a while, and find studies for yourself.

Allowing God to move him is the best thing you could do at this point.

 

[sdmsanjose]

Your husband probably knows that he should be reading scriptures but for some reason(s) he is refusing. That is something that only he and the spirit can change. You will have to be patient and do what you know to be right for you.

Keep doing those things that God wants you to do like bible studies/reading scriptures. God is your number one priority but other prioities are to be attended to as well.

Never let anyone talk you into moving God down from being number one priority.

By Savedgirl
Also ... is it true that a person who claims to be a Christian can refuse to read scripture?

YES

Is it necessary to read scripture?

It is not necessary to read scriptures to be a Christian but in order to mature and be strong in the faith you need to hear God’s words.


Romans 10:17

17 So then faith cometh by hearing, and hearing by the word of God</SPAN>

 

[spr]

Maybe God has called you to be closer to him. If you husband isn't hearing that calling don't force it. There may be some grief to endure before he sees what you see. Only your forbearance and love will draw him to God.

 

[savedgirl10]

I guess part of me wonders too, am not being submissive if I continue my studies? Iff he wants me to give them up and I don't am I sinning?

 

[All Souls]

What are his excuses?

 

[savedgirl10]

that he was forced to read/study as a child and that he knows all he needs to about the bible..and that he just cant find time to attend any studies with me...

 

[All Souls]

are there any guys at church who could mentor him?

 

[savedgirl10]

There are plenty of them...but he won't even talk about it....says he does not nor will he ever need friends..I have mentioned how nice and beneficial it could be to have nice Godly couples to do things with...but he says there is no such thing as friends for adults.

 

[All Souls]

does he enjoy reading?

 

[savedgirl10]

I don't know..he only wants to watch tv..sports..The Sopranos(which I do not like him watching)..or he orders movies...

 

[All Souls]

sounds hard for you, but there doesn't seem like there is much you can do other than pray. Does he like the church you attend?

 

[savedgirl10]

Yes..he says he does...I pray all the time that God will touch his heart...

 

[All Souls]

where would he fit on the myers-briggs indicator?

 

[WolfGate]

Yes, he could be a Christian but not enjoy reading the bible. It's not a salvation issue - despite that fact that he should spend time in the word. We all fall short and all have some things we do or do not do.

You are not sinning if you continue to study the bible - as long as you aren't using the bible study as a tool to drive a wedge between you two or to make some kind of passive aggressive point or to intentionally irritate him.

I do wonder if he feels like you are judging him for not wanting to attend these bible studies. Unless something like that is happening then his reactions make little sense to me.

Based only on what I've read here, my suggestion would be for you to continue to do the studies, read your bible, but do so without stating or implying that he should be also - either in words or actions. I don't think you can change his heart on this issue. Pray for him, because God can.