Guilt?

[Kazamataz]

So I was watching Oprah and they had a debate about should mums stay at home or should they work?

The biggest theme i got out of it was that working mums and stay at home mums both felt some level of guilt.

So i wanted to know does anyone on here feel guilty for the choice they've made.

Whether it be the choice to stay at home or return to work?

 

[RoseofLima]

I don't feel any guilt...I work my butt off. I help provide for our family by being frugal and a good manager of our household.

However- I am very blessed, because my husband does not want cable, or a big TV, or a new SUV, or to read the newspaper everyday. I think that takes a lot of pressure off me.

 

[ChildByGrace]

My best friend was talking to me about this a little while ago.

She would agree. No matter who she speaks to about it she gets the impression that they all feel guilt.

She herself feels guilty because her H hard;y makes any money - for the last 3 years he has been in college and they haven't had any income and they have 3 children. She felt guilty because she felt that she should be working in order to provide her children with the nice things of life.
Those of her friends who have children and work feel guilty that they aren't spending as much time with their children as they should be and those that don't work feel guilty that they can't provide the nice things, or in some cases the basics, of life.

i have no idea how i will feel at all. i know that i do not want to work and i know i will be happy with that decision but no doubt when we are struggling to make ends meet i may well feel guilty for not working - who knows

 

[jgonz]

I have never felt guilty by staying home, because my job is 24/7 and I rarely get a break.

I do, however, know Lots of moms who work and feel guilty because they "should" be home (I don't believe that, but that's what they've told me). I have met a handful of moms who stay home who feel guilty for not bringing in some income... but when we talk about it, it's really more that they feel stressed & overwhelmed being home and would rather work and feel productive.

IMO, it's symptomatic of our society~ women are brought up to believe they can do Anything and Everything, but we can't. There will always be compromise in Some area...

 

[Kazamataz]

IMO, it's symptomatic of our society~ women are brought up to believe they can do Anything and Everything, but we can't. There will always be compromise in Some area...

This is such a good point! why do women think they need to do it all and have it all?

It's just not possible when you look at it logically but yet still so many women strive for it.

 

[ConservativeChristian97]

I've been a SAHW for about eight months now, no regrets. Yeah, we've struggled a bit, but at least I'm home when my hubby is and I'm going to get to watch our son grow up, learn new things, and get to play with him every day. Why should I feel guilty?

 

[Green Orchid]

I had guilt before I got pregnant and at the beginning. I kind of bought into the "if you have no career you're nothing" mindset. Then I asked God to deliver me from this kind of thinking because it certainly doesn't come from Him. Now I'm totally at peace with becoming a SAHM and I find it's a glorious calling to be able to raise children and devote myself full time to them. And it doesn't mean it's the only thing I'll be doing either, there's plenty of opportunities for me to get involved at church too.

 

[PegasusOnFire]

I don't feel guilt at all for working. My husband just lost his job so I need to work to provide for our small yet growing family. In a perfect world I could stay home, but we don't live in a perfect world.

I am home for several hours between bus routes so that helps alot. Currently my husband is looking for a night job so that he can be home during the day while I work to help pay for the necessities of life.

No we do not have cable/satalite or a brand new car. We don't miss those things either. We have a very small two bedroom house, but we live comfortably in it.