Giving Up...

[antiarte]

Anybody here ever feels just like giving up on meeting someone, on finally having a partner and companionship? I'm at state in which I really don't care anymore. It's not really surrender...it's more like, screw it, y'know.

Anybody else thinks it's just never happening, falling and love and all that *stuff*?

 

[StaySalty]

I think you're a little young to feel that way. Don't sweat it, the average age of marriage now is about 28, last I heard...
But regardless of that, I'm sure God has the right person for you in His time.

 

[Ant21]

I think you're a little young to feel that way. Don't sweat it, the average age of marriage now is about 28, last I heard...
But regardless of that, I'm sure God has the right person for you in His time.

Is 28 the average for christian couples or does it include every who thinks it's ok to sleep with as many people as they can before settling down and getting married at an average of 28?

 

[antiarte]

I think you're a little young to feel that way. Don't sweat it, the average age of marriage now is about 28, last I heard...
But regardless of that, I'm sure God has the right person for you in His time.

Yeah, I might be young, 23, but I'm alone. Do you have any idea how it feels to be alone all the time without no one to talk to? Maybe you do. I don't know. The thing is most of my friends are y'know, starting their own families and all that. I'm the one still, y'know...alone and stuff. I don't mind really, and I don't care. Sometimes it just gets hard. But I said screw it and y'know, move on.

 

[london boy]

Yeah, i know how you feel antiarte because I sometimes feel the same way. The key to overcoming this problem is perserverance. Even if it isn't happening now or hasn't happened, doesn't mean that it won't happen. The important thing is not to focus on what you haven't got, but what you have and how you can apply your gifts for God's Kingdom (Matt 6:33). Give it time, it will happen After all, He knows your deepest wishes and He will deliver His promises in His time

 

[nhzname]

Yeah, i know how you feel antiarte because I sometimes feel the same way. The key to overcoming this problem is perserverance. Even if it isn't happening now or hasn't happened, doesn't mean that it won't happen. The important thing is not to focus on what you haven't got, but what you have and how you can apply your gifts for God's Kingdom (Matt 6:33). Give it time, it will happen After all, He knows your deepest wishes and He will deliver His promises in His time

Perfect timing for this thread. I've been pretty much feeling the same as antiarte, and trying to convince myself that maybe I'm supposed to be alone from now on, so be content. Honestly though, I'm not content, and some days its just not real easy to set my eyes on Jesus and trust Him. I'm not sure whether my deepest desires are His desires for me... Right now, though, I accept that I'm alone and try to fill up my time so I don't think about it as much.

 

[thrach]

i'm 22 and alone, never really had anyone. All I have is my looks because I dont think anyone really cares about me for me. It might be better to be alone waiting for the right one. You could end up in a relationship you dont like while someone better comes along and you miss that oportunity because your already with someone. I'm also very picky and thats why i'm alone. Alot of girls I tend to like tend to not be christian too so that makes it hard. Things like drugs and premiscuity turn me off and then I dont want them but i'll still be their friend.

Something I learned from my aunt about men is that our ability to reason isn't fully matured till we are 30 years old hence the waiting till your 30 lol. She told me alot of jewish men wernt allowed to marry till then because of it. I dont know anything really about if that is true or not thats just what i'm told. I'm lonely too but there is alot of girls that I like but then again dont want. It will probably be easier as we age since women get lonely and their hormones of having children start pounding them. I feel it may be in our best interest?

 

[Breetai]

Yeah, I might be young, 23, but I'm alone. Do you have any idea how it feels to be alone all the time without no one to talk to?

Try moving to a new country where you don't know a soul and you can't even read a restaurant menu.

If you have no one to talk to, it's your own fault for not getting out enough. I really believe that, so don't expect an apology for such a direct comment.

Maybe you could try relocating to a new city. You'll be forced to meet new people. If whatever you're doing with your life isn't working out, try something new.

 

[none the wiser]

Try moving to a new country where you don't know a soul and you can't even read a restaurant menu.

If you have no one to talk to, it's your own fault for not getting out enough. I really believe that, so don't expect an apology for such a direct comment.

Maybe you could try relocating to a new city. You'll be forced to meet new people. If whatever you're doing with your life isn't working out, try something new.

Or she could be forced into a depression for having noone to talk to. The problem is that some of us can't just...go out and meet people. I agree that some effort has to be put forth, but as for me, rejection is something I'm terrified of, with friendships and dating relationships both. When I went off to college, I was in a depression for the first semester...I had literally noone. Alot of it was due to my passive personality, and my roommate. (longggg story) It wasn't for not trying, I just don't warm up to everyone. I'm friendly, but they never see the real me, you know? In my friendships and my relationships, it's hard to pursue both if there is no...I don't know what else to call it but chemistry. I have two close friends now, and many friends (step past aquaintance) but it took me almost 8 months to get to this point.

Antiarte, I know how you feel, and I've gotten the "you're young yet" thing too. I guess it would mean more, the young thing, if I had been involved seriously with someone before. I've had one dating relationship ever, and I pushed him away, and I've come to the conclusion that it was because I was scared or something.

Anyway, know that you're not alone in your struggles...and don't give up completely. I think it's a country song that says your future could be someone you see everyday, but never really look at them.

 

[london boy]

Try moving to a new country where you don't know a soul and you can't even read a restaurant menu.

If you have no one to talk to, it's your own fault for not getting out enough. I really believe that, so don't expect an apology for such a direct comment.

Maybe you could try relocating to a new city. You'll be forced to meet new people. If whatever you're doing with your life isn't working out, try something new.

That's good advice. Upping and leaving can be an amazing experience. I came to faith 'cos I moved away from London. I knew I had to discover something else. It may seem daunting, but believe me, obstacles and challneges are just there to be overcome

 

[Diane_Windsor]

I'm a little bit older then you, but I nearly started this same thread topic a few days ago. I'm pretty much convinced that I will be single for the rest of my life. Every time I went on to a new plateau (high school, community college, university, grad school, etc.) in my life I had a hope of finding at least a boyfriend, but no such luck. At Baylor I joined some clubs, joined a church, and still no such luck. When I eventually (God-willing that will be soon) get a job, I have no expectation that I will meet the first boyfriend there either. It seems like I will never have a man geninuely like me for me-warts and all, but I am nearly at the point where I do not care.

Diane

 

[waterbear]

I don't really try. I still question my motives and I'm not entirely sure I want to spend a lot of time with anyone right now - especially engaging in normal social activities (bleh!) It's quite possible for anyone to find someone, though the odds are more favorable if you're willing to change yourself a bit (not pretend your someone else, change). In the end it's simply a matter of what you value more.

 

[Harpuia]

Kinda reminds me of me. I begged to God, pleaded for finding someone and I always get shunned down. That's when I realized that my life is my life and there's nothing anyone is going to do to help me. I had to learn the hard way that I probably missed my boat...

 

[lady_of_god]

There are times when i feel like throwing in the towel and saying "...k I GIVE UP!!!!". All that is, is just pure frustration.

Something deep down inside won't give up... i have said the words before but I can't bring myself to act on it. I trust that God will bless me with the desires of my heart.. if it is in His will, and on His time that is.

I'm younger than you antiarte and ready to be married now (not the whole kids thing however lol). I'm faithful God will change things and soon for me.

So I guess i'm saying, I know it hurts to see your friends (or even people you don't know) around you getting together and having relationships but stay faithful, and prayerful that the Lord will bless you with a wonderful woman in your life. You won't ever receive that blessing if you throw in the towel

-Lady

 

[Harpuia]

There are times when i feel like throwing in the towel and saying "...k I GIVE UP!!!!". All that is, is just pure frustration.

Something deep down inside won't give up... i have said the words before but I can't bring myself to act on it. I trust that God will bless me with the desires of my heart.. if it is in His will, and on His time that is.

I'm younger than you antiarte and ready to be married now (not the whole kids thing however lol). I'm faithful God will change things and soon for me.

So I guess i'm saying, I know it hurts to see your friends (or even people you don't know) around you getting together and having relationships but stay faithful, and prayerful that the Lord will bless you with a wonderful woman in your life. You won't ever receive that blessing if you throw in the towel

-Lady

Or you can be like me and wait to see if Jesus will reward you, if ever.

 

[MrDude]

Yeah I gave up, but not because I couldn't find someone. My perspective has changed in the past month or two, big time.

I realized that there are more important/better things for me. I get bored really easily, and I highly doubt I'll ever find anyone I'm willing to stay with long enough and marry. Plus I'm really looking forward to my job much more than I am any kind of a romance.

 

[MrDude]

Or you can be like me and wait to see if Jesus will reward you, if ever.

News flash buddy, that kind of attitude isn't gonna get you anything.

 

[Harpuia]

News flash buddy, that kind of attitude isn't gonna get you anything.

The more positive attitude left me with several broken hearts, a tattered arm, a broken leg, and multiple attempts at suicide.

I'll stick with the attitude I have now on life thank you very much.

 

[lady_of_god]

The more positive attitude left me with several broken hearts, a tattered arm, a broken leg, and multiple attempts at suicide.

I'll stick with the attitude I have now on life thank you very much.

God didn't say "think negatively, doubt, and I will give you everything you could possibly dream of."

He said : Luke 11:9 "And I say unto you, Ask, and it shall be given you; seek, and ye shall find; knock, and it shall be opened unto you."


Mat 17:20 "And Jesus said unto them, Because of your unbelief: for verily I say unto you, If ye have faith as a grain of mustard seed, ye shall say unto this mountain, Remove hence to yonder place; and it shall remove; and nothing shall be impossible unto you."


I've had the broken heart before... been hurt more than once actually. I use to be suicidal a long time ago but not anymore. God has given me every reason to trust Him with my life so why wouldn't i trust Him with my love life? I'm not saying it's easy but I am saying that God knows what is better for you and He also knows the desires of your heart.

Pray to Him and trust Him with this. Get that perspective turned around and think positively. God is Good... you never know what He has for you but you gotta have that faith

-Lady