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Forcing beliefs on Non-Christians

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Mr.Cheese

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We forget sometimes that we can't "convert" anyone. We make the introduction and then God does the rest as he works in your heart.

Trying to do more than that is exceeding our purpose and that creates problems...obviously.

Tell your friend to have patience with you. You need him to answer your questions, not to argue with you.

Never believe something in order to make someone happy.
Only believe it if/when you know it's true.
 
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Lil' A

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To be honest with you, it's your choice with whatever you want to believe...as long as what you believe is the truth! What your christian friend is telling is the truth but you, on your own time, have to make a desicion on what you want out of this.

Trust me, God will show you the way, the truth, and the life! He will direct your paths when it is the right time...on His time that is! Be patient with yourself. From the sound of it, you're kidding yourself. What I mean by that is you basically want to please your friend, saying to Him that you believe but deep inside, you only know that you're lying to yourself!

Like I said earlier, God will let you know when you're REALLY ready. It takes time Elenmar, to get where you want to go. It may take weeks, months, or even years until you TRULY believe in the Lord Jesus Christ, our Savior. But just be patient and leave all your circumstances to God because HE WILL take care of it!

I hope that I've helped some.

Lil' A

P.S. If you have any questions or just want to talk to me on a personal note, just IM me.
 
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kiwichristian

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Forcing beliefs on people is just not the way to go.
I myself would not do that...now.
I used to think that I could, but, it puts people off, and its not the way that Jesus did when He spoke with people.
Being gentle with them and listening to them will get their attention and they will respect you.
We need to be salt and light to people, as Jesus said.
To love them, as He does. Lets do that, as we grow more into mature Christians.
God bless you all. :hug:
 
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Bartimaeus

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Elenmar said:
Thank you all for your care and time and help. I'm grateful that I've found this forum. I've read what you've said, and it's got me thinking...

Surprised by joy: Thank you... you've said it so simply, but it's comforting.

Paolo: What you said has helped me: "You don´t bring fruit to be accepted of God, You will eventually bring fruit because you are accepted by God." Yes, I realise I've been concentrating too much on all the changes I would have to make...

Devoted Daughter: Thank you for your advice; I will try my best to follow it. I've always wondered a lot about Christianity, and I've decided finally that even if I don't decide that I can believe now, I still have to walk away from this experience a little less ignorant. I find the Bible and this forum very inspiring. I'm currently reading the NIV version of the Bible. You said: "Be open. We only grow and learn from change, but we must show our willingness, and be open to God's plan for us, not our own plan. You don't want to be "stuck", but you "don't want to change"?" I think I was a little unclear... I don't want to be stuck like this halfway, and while I know sooner or later I have to make a decision, I don't want to make it now. I don't want to change... anytime soon. When I say that, I'm aware it could take years and years. I want to read the entire Bible and be clear of all the things that cause me doubt before I make my decision. I do want to believe, but only if I can believe without doubt that I am not doing it for other people...

DudeForChrist: Previously you said, "What kinds of doubts are you having about Jesus? By the way, pretending to believe can be just as hurtful as not believing at all." I'm wondering a lot of things, what I thought only I was confused about, until I read so many other threads and replies here , and I found the answers I was looking for. It's a lot of the common things: the justice of non believers going to heaven and hell, the concept of heaven and hell, and etc. etc... And of course, still, just simply about believing in Jesus, believing that he saved us all. I understand how it is, but it is so hard to believe. I think that people who struggled to convert can understand this. It's defying everything I've ever believed in, and it takes time. And sometimes even time is not enough... Actually, about both being equally harmful, I think pretending to believe is worse. And so for now, I will have to be a formally declared non believer on the outside looking in until one day I might be able to say what I need to say with faith.

Shetland Rose: I know... I know it's out of care and so it is so difficult to push away. "I hope your friend never does give up praying for you." Maybe... I know I would feel terrible if he ever gave up on me, yet I hope if I fail to believe, he will not pressure me. The problem is... I'm certain he has no idea how much pressure this all is. But when he talks of it to me, he looks so sad, that inside of me I am pressuring myself.

No replies are necessary; I know how much time it takes to think up a good response. There are more needy people out there than me. I feel silly already having posted up such a petty problem.
Elenmar,
Your problem is not petty. You are wrestling...and this is the ultiimate match, you know? It's the match where you wrestle for your soul. :)

I'll be praying for you.
:prayer:
 
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MQTA

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Lil' A said:
To be honest with you, it's your choice with whatever you want to believe...as long as what you believe is the truth! What your christian friend is telling is the truth but you, on your own time, have to make a desicion on what you want out of this.
.
Ever watch Welcome Back Kotter? The principal was asked what Freedom means, he said "Freedom... Freedom... Freedom... You're free to do as you're told."
 
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Pandiani

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Elenmar said:
While I would like to believe, if only to make my friend happy... I just can't, not before I have found the truth which I can accept and believe. I know the correct answers, but it's so difficult to believe! I'm not even sure I want to anymore... I don't like this. I respect my Christian friends, and if only they would respect me the same way!

I honestly don't want to change the way I live, the way I think, the way in which has worked so well for me all my life (which admittedly, hasn't been so long) but still they're mine. I refuse to give them up so easily. I want to believe for myself, there's too much pressure now... But worst of all, I cannot argue. My friend is pained and trying to convert me because he thinks I will go to hell and he is trying to save me... it changes the situation. I can see he truly believes this and so I want to believe so he feels better, but at the same time I'm a little resentful.
Hello Elenmar. I just wanted to say something quickly. As an Atheist, I have no problem with people chosing what they believe. As long as they made the choice themselves. I cannot accept people believing just to make someone else happy. I have a friend in a similar situation. My advice to him (and to you) is to be honest. Tell your friend you want to take it at your own pace and that he is pressuring you too much. In these situations, honesty is the best thing. Honesty towards your friend and honesty towards yourself. If you don't want to believe, well then don't. I'm not telling you not to become a christian though. You must do what you want to do and what you feel is right. Not what others want. Your friend will understand. Just make sure you let him know that you want to remain friends and that you would never ask him to change his ways. This is very important as many Christians believe that if you are not with them, you are against them.

Take it at your own pace. Read the bible if you want to. Your friend said he'll keep trying, let him. You will see that time eventually fixes everything.

Good luck, just make sure you choose what makes you happy.
 
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Elenmar said:
Thank you all for your care and time and help. I'm grateful that I've found this forum. I've read what you've said, and it's got me thinking...

Surprised by joy: Thank you... you've said it so simply, but it's comforting.

Paolo: What you said has helped me: "You don´t bring fruit to be accepted of God, You will eventually bring fruit because you are accepted by God." Yes, I realise I've been concentrating too much on all the changes I would have to make...

Devoted Daughter: Thank you for your advice; I will try my best to follow it. I've always wondered a lot about Christianity, and I've decided finally that even if I don't decide that I can believe now, I still have to walk away from this experience a little less ignorant. I find the Bible and this forum very inspiring. I'm currently reading the NIV version of the Bible. You said: "Be open. We only grow and learn from change, but we must show our willingness, and be open to God's plan for us, not our own plan. You don't want to be "stuck", but you "don't want to change"?" I think I was a little unclear... I don't want to be stuck like this halfway, and while I know sooner or later I have to make a decision, I don't want to make it now. I don't want to change... anytime soon. When I say that, I'm aware it could take years and years. I want to read the entire Bible and be clear of all the things that cause me doubt before I make my decision. I do want to believe, but only if I can believe without doubt that I am not doing it for other people...

DudeForChrist: Previously you said, "What kinds of doubts are you having about Jesus? By the way, pretending to believe can be just as hurtful as not believing at all." I'm wondering a lot of things, what I thought only I was confused about, until I read so many other threads and replies here , and I found the answers I was looking for. It's a lot of the common things: the justice of non believers going to heaven and hell, the concept of heaven and hell, and etc. etc... And of course, still, just simply about believing in Jesus, believing that he saved us all. I understand how it is, but it is so hard to believe. I think that people who struggled to convert can understand this. It's defying everything I've ever believed in, and it takes time. And sometimes even time is not enough... Actually, about both being equally harmful, I think pretending to believe is worse. And so for now, I will have to be a formally declared non believer on the outside looking in until one day I might be able to say what I need to say with faith.

Shetland Rose: I know... I know it's out of care and so it is so difficult to push away. "I hope your friend never does give up praying for you." Maybe... I know I would feel terrible if he ever gave up on me, yet I hope if I fail to believe, he will not pressure me. The problem is... I'm certain he has no idea how much pressure this all is. But when he talks of it to me, he looks so sad, that inside of me I am pressuring myself.

No replies are necessary; I know how much time it takes to think up a good response. There are more needy people out there than me. I feel silly already having posted up such a petty problem.
Hmph... If you don't believe than don't try. No matter how you kid yourself, you will never be true to your cause. Give up, and join me. One Truth Prevails, you have to see that. I have seen the truth, pm me for details...
 
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