Fed up

[Loopi]

Im fed up. of cutting, of not coping with anything.

My life is amess at the moment, emotionally i have no idea how im surviving. currently i have a bandaged arm, its like im holding myself together. im fed up of having to glue back the pieces of me just to take another battering from life, another torrent of put downs from my mum

im tired, of fighting self harm, of telling myslef that i can make it that extra day, that extra week without cuttong, only to explode again. i cant stop cutting, because its keeping me alive at the moment. but i cant keep cutting.

I feel so trapped and so far from God. And so alone, even though i know others feel like this.

Im just fed up.

 

[goldenviolet]

Loopi, sweetheart... it is an exhausting cycle. but you really aren't trapped away from God. He loves and cherishes you no matter where you are in your walk.
learning self control and disapline is difficult for everyone. it's extra hard on us while we are young and not as exsperianced as we are when we get older in our walk & have growth under our belt.
it's ok to set problems aside to rest your weariness and to seek something joyful. practice giving yourself a break from struggles by letting other things in your life. SI shouldn't consume who you are. sweetheart, there are lovely things about life and about you. there is a time to work on your problems, and a time to set them aside to work on loving yourself with the many blessings around you.
again... it takes practice to put struggles aside. see how important it is though? God made you precious. you are valuable and lovely.

 

[jesuschickseven]

All I can say is that I know where you're coming from. At some point we all reach this stage...where we're fed up and tired kind of like a mid-life crisis but honestly it can surface at any age for any reason.
When you get to this point many people do something stupid to run away from their life, but some turn to God for the answers (thank-God I was one of the few)
Pray..I know we've heard that so much it doesn't seem to mean anything, but it works. When you turn your heart over to God and truly let go of all the things your'r e clinging to you will be set free.
And boy does that feel good!!! Pray that God will fill you with a deep deep love for him and respect and compassion for yourself as him to fill you with a strong desire to know him and serve him and don't be surprised when he does...I'm praying for you, your sister in Christ

 

[Mayflower1]

Im fed up. of cutting, of not coping with anything.

My life is amess at the moment, emotionally i have no idea how im surviving. currently i have a bandaged arm, its like im holding myself together. im fed up of having to glue back the pieces of me just to take another battering from life, another torrent of put downs from my mum

im tired, of fighting self harm, of telling myslef that i can make it that extra day, that extra week without cuttong, only to explode again. i cant stop cutting, because its keeping me alive at the moment. but i cant keep cutting.

I feel so trapped and so far from God. And so alone, even though i know others feel like this.

Im just fed up.

Loopi, I know how frustrating it is to try and try and still fail at what you are trying to do. I just get so sick of it! You can't give up though!!!! Christ didn't give up on you nor will He ever. I will pray for you and I hope it becomes easier for you over time. Just remember, "I can do all things through Christ which strengtheneth me." Phillippians 4:13

 

[goldenviolet]

where is our loopi?

 

[NinadeDios777]

hey, i know you don't really know me and i have no idea who you are, but, eh, i sent a prayer up in your direction.

 

[Loopi]

Thanks everyone, i really need prayer atm. [I'm struggling more these days]. It was a good idea at the time. I dunno, im feelin gso lost atm, everything feels surreal


[bracketed comment edited by Deamiter]

 

[goldenviolet]

Loopi !!!

the bible tells a love story... written just for you... to help you daily know what to do. can you get a teen bible to help you with issues and study that are in your age range?

do you have peer support groups or bible studies?

i just know there is helpful building blocks waiting for you.

anyone else have any ideas?

 

[trinitygrace]

Those are some very helpful ideas Goldenviolet. I too struggled with self-injury and it was a horrible experience, just like depression. You think you are better but then something happens and you are back where you started. Very discouraging. But we do have hope Loopi that God is with us and loves us. He sent His only son to die for us on the cross. He loves us so much, the last thing he wants us to do is hurt ourselves. The world is hurting us enough. Goldenviolets suggestions about getting a teen bible, and joining your church's youth group or bible group are great. I would also add that having a trusted friend or better yet, a mentor to call on when you are feeling down and have the urge to cut would also be invaluable. Please hang in there girl. When your mum or others get to you, steal away to your room and give your troubles to Jesus. He is bigger than all of us, bigger than the world and He will hold you in His arms, take away your pain and give you hope. I will be praying for you.

Love,
Trinity

Loopi !!!

the bible tells a love story... written just for you... to help you daily know what to do. can you get a teen bible to help you with issues and study that are in your age range?

do you have peer support groups or bible studies?

i just know there is helpful building blocks waiting for you.

anyone else have any ideas?

 

[daughteroftheking1983]

I agree with golden violet, the thing that gets me through the tough times is having support from a close friend. One thing that I have been recently doing which has helped a lot is writing down my feelings if I get the urge to self harm. Even if I can write for about 10 minutes and still end up cutting, at least when the feelings pass I can look back on how I was feeling in that moment and learn from it. The counsellor I am seeing really helps me with this.

 

[Loopi]

Thanks for the ideas everyone, i shall read them when i am more able to take them in. My sister was in a car accident along with several other of my youth group in the early hours of the morning. i had a row with my boyf which has finished us off. then my nan died. all in the same day. im totally numb and struggling a lot with self harm today. i know all these bad things have happened but i dont feel them.