Fantasy Novelist's Exam

[Lessien]

Yeah, I think it's a little extreme, giving you a failing grade for answering "yes" to one question. I think they should make it more like a Mary Sue test--give each question a certain point value, and create a scale of how bad it is based on how many points you earned. (Then again, even the Mary Sue tests aren't perfect. On one of them, they had a disclaimer that "Morpheus from the Sandman comics scored high on this test, yet we don't consider him to be a Mary Sue." I guess it all depends on how you handle it.)

 

[Paladin Dave]

I think the reason those stories failed was because the idea behind the test is to cull the people who think they're awesome fantasy writers, and are really just copying existing fantasy.

 

[NeoScribe]

True, and alot of those tropes don't apply just to Fantasy. So if you're doing a sci-fi/fantasy story or any other genre with fantasy you might use one of those ideas and not know it's a fantasy trope, but a regular idea from another genre.

And the test is rather unfair to writers of more classical fantasy, where elves and such are sort of a given (giving them bows or assualt rifles is entirelly up to the writer though, so guess which one I chose). And since we all answered to at least three of those listed bad ideas, either all our stories really suck, or we just use ideas that have been used before; which sorta defines a genre.

Really, its like criticizing a romance novel for having people in love in it or a western for being set in the west. The exam is nore like a list of over-used cliches than anything else. And I still don't see why a warrior woman would not be more comfortable with a sword than a skillet!

 

[Lessien]

First of all: Elves with assault rifles sound really really cool!

Back to the conversation at hand....

Some of those things are pretty bad. I'd say if you answered yes to any of these:

1. Did you draw a map for your novel which includes places named things like "The Blasted Lands" or "The Forest of Fear" or "The Desert of Desolation" or absolutely anything "of Doom"?
2. Does your novel contain a prologue that is impossible to understand until you've read the entire book, if even then?
3. Do you see nothing wrong with having two characters from the same small isolated village being named "Tim Umber" and "Belthusalanthalus al'Grinsok"?
4. Do you write your battle scenes by playing them out in your favorite RPG?
5. Do your characters spend an inordinate amount of time journeying from place to place?
6. Could one of your main characters tell the other characters something that would really help them in their quest but refuses to do so just so it won't break the plot?
7. Heaven help you, do you ever use the term "hit points" in your novel?

then I'd say you either need to make some major changes or scrap the book completely. Those are hallmarks of "bad fantasy"--fantasy written by naive young authors who think they can skate by knowing nothing but cliches, or who think they're fantasy experts because they're avid RPGers.

 

[Paladin Dave]

Actually, the very popular Dragonlance series is an old fantasy series done by writing down the events played out in a game of Dungeons and Dragons, more or less. Again, a lot of these things are indeed cliches, based off of already successful fantasy material.

And your mention of Elves with assault rifles makes me think of the Eldar in Warhammer 40k. I generally don't like the race, but it still reminds me of Warhammer 40k's ability to mix old-hat fantasy with new storyline, spectrum, and technology to make something shiny, new, and awesome. I mean, you've got frikin elves and orcs in space, fighting against humans, and its AWESOME! Eldar are still best at running and hiding, Orks are still savage, dull-witted, and powerful in spite of low tech, and humans are average with a whole lot of will to kick the crap out of anything in their path and xenophobically cleanse anything that doesn't match their preferences., and the guns, tanks and cybernetics to do it!

I did notice, though, that World of Warcraft made the map mistake. There are Blasted Lands, Desolace(a very grim and dreary desert), Felwood(Fel usually being related to hell or evil in some way), but no doom stuff.

 

[Lessien]

lol.

They should add another question:

Did you create a map of your fantasy world that shows a desert ringed by mountains on three sides and a lush forest on the other?

Yes, that's another Paolini. His map of Alagasia shows a vast Sahara-like desert surrounded by Rockies-type mountains on three sides and the elves' forest on the other. All of these geographic regions conform to their stereotypes: the desert is hot, sandy and desolate, the forest is lush and green, and the mountains are cold and rugged.

Here's a link to the map: http://www.alagaesia.com/alagaesia.htm

 

[NeoScribe]

Also, "Do you have a villian who's evil just because you say so?"

Or: "Is your villian evil because he taxes the people?"

 

[Lessien]

"Do you consider taxes to be the root of all evil?"

"Does your main villain spend most of his time sitting in his palace, taxing the people and being corrupt?"

 

[NeoScribe]

I guess that means sitting in a palace counts as being corrupt.

 

[Lessien]

Because everyone KNOWS people who just sit around all day aren't only corrupt--they're pure evil.

Oh, and if you're one of the king's soldiers, you're automatically evil. Never mind that you're happily married, your family is your greatest joy in life, you're kind to everyone you meet and treat women with the utmost respect--you work for any kind of royalty, you're pure evil.

Hmmm.....I'm writing that one day and it's MINE!!!!

 

[NeoScribe]

And the mooks in the bad guys army and the farmers in the good guys army all know how to use whatever weapon is handy. Forget training. And bow and arrows = headshot!! Even though, and I quote from a fictional character who got it right: "You think it's that simple? You think that after being 'trained' to aim for the center mass your whole military career you can suddenly make an expert headshot everytime?(WWZ)"

 

[Lessien]

Eragon: What? You...you mean....it's possible to....MISS?!

He falls to the ground convulsing as his world implodes.

 

[sunstruckdream]

...And as he lays there, he ponders what has occured.

And still can't make sense of it.

For someone who ponders so much, he's not especially good at it.

 

[Lessien]

No, no, he has to wait until he's recovered from his world imploding. After that, he wakes up in the elvish infirmary, healed from all his wounds (even the psychological scars from that time when he was four and saw his uncle Garrow scratching his butt) and THEN he goes outside, sits on a rock and ponders what has occurred.

 

[sunstruckdream]

Right, of course! Silly of me...=p