Hey! Don't be angry at God! He is NOT responsible for all the pain!!!! If God loves us so much, how can He do bad things to us? All the bad stuff are from the devil. Period. BUT, God can turn the devil's plans into good.
Now, time to exercise your faith. I don't care how weak you feel. I don't care how discouraged you are. You have to CLING on to God. Tell Him, "Lord, help me have faith. I can't do this on my own. Help me Jesus!!!!" Depend totally on Him. Listen, Faith is not saying, "Please heal me God." or "Will you heal me Jesus?". Faith is, "Jesus, I believe that by Your stripes, I AM ALREADY healed. I am well already. Because Christ has redeemed me from the curse of the law, which includes sickness." Confess "By Jesus stripes, I AM healed." every hour. Go for the surgery by all means, but expect coming out well and whole.
Let me tell you an amazing testimony. There's this deacon in my church who discovered kidney stones in his kidney. So his doctor told him to go for an operation. But this deacon told his doctor, "I believe what the Word of God says. In Isaiah 53, it is said that by Jesus stripes, I am healed. I am going to stand on the Word. So I'll not be going for an operation."
The doctor looked at him strangely but nevertheless, allowed him to go home and set up another appointment. The deacon went home, stood on and confessed the Word and claimed his healing. Then he went for another check up. He was very excited. Did the scan and everything, but the stones were still there.
The doctor was skeptical. He said, "See, the stones are still there. You better quickly go for an operation or complications will arise."
The deacon said, "No, I'm going to stand on God's Word. God said I am healed so I am healed." The doctor gave in and set up another appointment.
The third appointment. He went for the scan, but.......the stones were still there! This time, the doctor said, "Look, I respect your beliefs and everything, but apparently, this isn't going to work. Now, go for an operation before it gets too late." (His condition was a condition such that the stones could not be removed by laser. Had to do manual operation.)
By this time, normally, people would feel discouraged and give in. After all, 3 times and God has not removed the kidney stones!
But the deacon stood strong and clinged to God. He told the doctor, "Give me one more chance. I believe God's Word."
The doctor looked at him and said, "Fine. One more chance. The next time, if the stones are not gone, I'm going to INSIST on an operation."
So again they set up another appointment and the deacon went home and kept on confessing Isaiah 53.
And he went back for the next appointment. Guess what? The stones were ALL GONE!!! PRAISE THE LORD!!!!!!!
I'm not telling you to cancel the surgery or anything. But see, God takes time to work. You mustn't waver in your faith. You have to stand strong and not care about what happens. God did not say bad things will not come, but He said that He'll make you more than a conqueror through Christ Jesus!!!!! You WILL overcome whatever trials you face, because God says you would. You gotta have that simply child-like faith!
Don't get angry at God okay? His not the culprit. Get angry with satan instead. =P Tell him, "Go to hell," and you aren't rude coz that's where he belongs *wink*