Exercise Bulimia

[Aedmis]

I've only recently come to the conclusion that I have an unhealthy relationship with food and exercise. It completely controls my mind, thoughts, and actions. I went to a freedom weekend with my church and it was the one thing that I wanted to get free of. But I couldn't.

5 years ago, I lost 80 pounds and I'm terrified of going back to that place.

Characteristics of my habits:

- Guilt after eating pretty much anything. Even healthy foods like carrots or salad.
- Difficulty eating "bad" foods and even higher guilt if I eat these things.
- Need to work off pretty much any calories that I've eaten in order to not get fat.
- Need to burn at least 900 calories at the gym each day. (6 days a week)
- Difficulty being happy with my appearance and tending to care too much about what others think.
- If planning to go out to eat, planning by viewing the menu in order to eat the lowest calorie thing on there.
- If planning to go out to eat, working out extra hard that day in order to burn off what I might eat. And working out pretty hard the next day too.
- Consumption of my mind with what I'm going to eat, guilt over what I've eaten, and reflecting on what I've eaten that's wrong.

Does anyone else have this problem? Or am I just crazy? My goal lately has been to surrender this completely to the Lord. He has given me peace with a lot of it, but I still find the devil coming back to attack me and try to bring me back to where I was.

I want to establish a workout routine for staying healthy and NOT to purge what I've eaten. I want to learn to eat without worrying about the calories involved.

Prayers appreciated!

 

[princesspeach5280]

I was going through everything you listed not too long ago. Even after I gained the desire to eat again, I found myself in a place where I felt like I couldn't, no matter how hard I tried. I finally did my best to give it up to God. I still struggled with thoughts about getting fat and about making sure I took in the least amount of calories possible for the day for a little while longer, but slowly God began working in me. He restored my positive view of myself and I began to eat normally again.

There are still some days when I feel like I'm fat or like I need to completely limit my calories again, but these are only thoughts from the devil. I just have to trust in God to show me that I really am beautiful to Him. I'm currently eating a normally again and God is still working in me in so many ways and is always showing me that He loves me.

I know it's a hard struggle to go through, but I will be praying for you everyday. I know God is with you, even when it feels like He's not.

And here is a quote from the book Get Lost by Dannah Gresh that I think may help you:
"But then I started spending time alone with the Lord, soaking in His words. I never specifically asked Him to heal my wounded self-image, but one day I found myself looking back at me in the bathroom mirror__ and it wasn't painful."

I'm also here to talk anytime you feel the need to talk.

 

[RuthD]

When I had Bulimia I asked myself why I was doing this to myself. The answer that came to me was to please others. After I realized that I got mad and stopped doing it all the time. I do it rarely now after twenty five years of suffering with it. Just sayin that's what worked for me. I'm praying for you. God bless you and heal you.

 

[Dextor]

Don't be worry , stay motivated and adopt a useful fitness plan. A fitness plan that contains healthy diet and proper physical workout. They are both important for fitness and prevention from diseases.

 

[Galilee63]

Hi Aedmis,

I have a close Family Member who exhibits the same traits you have mentioned.

She has both anorexia and bulimia x 7 years.

In and out of hospital on 3 occasions only, as a result of Jesus answering both her prayers and mine every time.

Since getting out of the home and working longer hours she has greatly improved through God's Loving Enlightenment and Wisdom; I asked her to pray for herself 3 years ago and hand it all over to Jesus and Our Lady Mary.

Since then, Jesus Blessed her with a job that is wonderful and never gave her time to eat inappropriately.

If you hand over your Heart Mind Soul and Body while 'Consecrating your Heart and Soul to Jesus' Divine Sacred Heart and Our Lady Mary's Immaculate Heart followed by ten Our Father's and ten Hail Mary's or the Holy Rosary asking Jesus to open up your Heart to Him; He will heal you from this dreadful disorder.

Kindest wishes