- Sep 30, 2018
- 1,381
- 1,060
- Country
- United States
- Faith
- Non-Denom
- Marital Status
- Private
So, I'm probably just very slow to learn things... But today I was feeling lonely about being single again. My best friend spent the day with his wife and baby and the neighbor and his wife were gone all day too. The thought occurred to me that they might have all been spending the day together, since my friend and the husband next door work together. And it makes sense, because they're all on the same page for the most part.
Then I thought about myself and how I'm still single and began to wonder why my married friend even asks me to hang out still, now that this other couple has moved into the area. And I began to think, that's probably why I was just sitting around home all day whereas they were all gone all day...
Sometimes I'm tempted to just tell my friend "You know what? Don't feel obligated to do things with me anymore. I know we're not on the same page any longer and you have this nice couple who is. So just forget about me and move on with life." But I don't dare say that because he very well might just agree to it, which isn't really what I want.
I sometimes hear about marriage and having children as being the "great equalizer". Well, for those of us who are left behind, it's the exact opposite. Suddenly someone you could share everything with and relate with has changed forever and has all kinds of experiences you know nothing about. There's still common ground, but until you get married or have children you will always be the odd third person and very possibly not the first choice for doing fun things together.
There is no such thing as a "great equalizer" on earth. The Church included. The great equalization will only happen when we are all in Heaven and there is no longer relational separations caused by marriages or new children.
As a kid I used to think it was very harsh of God to remove the marital status of believers in Heaven. I didn't like to think of my mom and dad just being friends... But now I actually see it as one more reason to look forward to Heaven - when friendships can go on uninterrupted and there will no longer be a such a thing as a "third wheel".
I should have probably realized this a long time ago, but then being single didn't ever bother me until I started noticing more gray hairs...
Then I thought about myself and how I'm still single and began to wonder why my married friend even asks me to hang out still, now that this other couple has moved into the area. And I began to think, that's probably why I was just sitting around home all day whereas they were all gone all day...
Sometimes I'm tempted to just tell my friend "You know what? Don't feel obligated to do things with me anymore. I know we're not on the same page any longer and you have this nice couple who is. So just forget about me and move on with life." But I don't dare say that because he very well might just agree to it, which isn't really what I want.
I sometimes hear about marriage and having children as being the "great equalizer". Well, for those of us who are left behind, it's the exact opposite. Suddenly someone you could share everything with and relate with has changed forever and has all kinds of experiences you know nothing about. There's still common ground, but until you get married or have children you will always be the odd third person and very possibly not the first choice for doing fun things together.
There is no such thing as a "great equalizer" on earth. The Church included. The great equalization will only happen when we are all in Heaven and there is no longer relational separations caused by marriages or new children.
As a kid I used to think it was very harsh of God to remove the marital status of believers in Heaven. I didn't like to think of my mom and dad just being friends... But now I actually see it as one more reason to look forward to Heaven - when friendships can go on uninterrupted and there will no longer be a such a thing as a "third wheel".
I should have probably realized this a long time ago, but then being single didn't ever bother me until I started noticing more gray hairs...