I'm having a bit of a problem with the idea of miracles. Not that I don't think they exist but with the concept of them. I was listening to the Soul Detox sermons and he was talking about how part of relieving the burdens of the soul that weigh you down is to remember the miracles in your life that God has done. A simple enough matter, I thought. But as I wrestled with the idea I honestly had a hard time pinning down what exactly a miracle was. I suppose that shows how far down the rabbit hole I've gone if I'm beginning to question that sort of thing.
There are the easy miracles that you can pick out easily like a sudden influx of money from nowhere or an uncurable disease being suddenly cured. These happened and I have no doubt about that, particularly ones that have been prayed for. But part of faith goes away when I know that there are plenty of other cases of people that do die from those uncurable diseases. And then there is a relative of mine who suffers through dementia and I just know that there's no way God would cure that. As a matter of fact, I hear my grandmother every night crying saying "Dear God, help me, help me!" I think this more than anything has probably made me jaded/cynical to the idea of miracles.
And then there are the "minor miracles". I just have become so blind in my faith that quite frankly I can't pick out what's supposed to be a miracle because I prayed for it or that it just happened because of the normal mechanics of the world and people. Like for instance, I just got a new job. Sure it was difficult getting the job, I had to jump through several hoops to get there but I did. Was that a miracle on God's behalf or was it due to my persistence and interview skills alone? Could it have been both? And I don't get why we would thank God for food if it was purchased with money I earned from a job I work. God didn't work the job for me after all.
I'm probably looking at this all wrong, I'm just I guess trying to believe in miracles again. Even if it's just the small ones.
There are the easy miracles that you can pick out easily like a sudden influx of money from nowhere or an uncurable disease being suddenly cured. These happened and I have no doubt about that, particularly ones that have been prayed for. But part of faith goes away when I know that there are plenty of other cases of people that do die from those uncurable diseases. And then there is a relative of mine who suffers through dementia and I just know that there's no way God would cure that. As a matter of fact, I hear my grandmother every night crying saying "Dear God, help me, help me!" I think this more than anything has probably made me jaded/cynical to the idea of miracles.
And then there are the "minor miracles". I just have become so blind in my faith that quite frankly I can't pick out what's supposed to be a miracle because I prayed for it or that it just happened because of the normal mechanics of the world and people. Like for instance, I just got a new job. Sure it was difficult getting the job, I had to jump through several hoops to get there but I did. Was that a miracle on God's behalf or was it due to my persistence and interview skills alone? Could it have been both? And I don't get why we would thank God for food if it was purchased with money I earned from a job I work. God didn't work the job for me after all.
I'm probably looking at this all wrong, I'm just I guess trying to believe in miracles again. Even if it's just the small ones.