I have been in and out of church for a long time, for 8 years I went to Sunday school with my brothers and dad to gt out of mum's hair for awhile then age 10 I went to a kids church for a year, at 13 I join youth group, 14 started going to church, 15 dedicated my life at a camp, 16 got baptised, 17 as far away from believing in God that I have ever been.
I have believed in God before but never felt that he was there, through rough times i felt more alone than I have ever felt before my christian friends went there for me when things were hard they abandoned me saying with there action that they didn't care. What i had heard wasn't matching up with what I was seeing and when we studied evolution in science it just grew more doubt in me because I'm a logical person who like facts and figure and that what science was unlike Christianity. For a year I played the role of good christian girl but behind it all I was a different person completely. I live in a home with two non-christian parents, one of which give me the impression that she doesn't like me being christian so I'm always afraid to do bible things or pray in my own house, also afraid to pray because God could reject me.
The thing is part of me still reckons there could be a God out there I just don't know where to look anymore because when I look around i see people saying one thing but doing another.
Where can I find the God I hear people talking about the one who loves us and that comforts the hurt in there lowest times. That's the God I want to experience instead of one that you never feel in your heart and appears to disappear completely as soon as the hard time come.
I have believed in God before but never felt that he was there, through rough times i felt more alone than I have ever felt before my christian friends went there for me when things were hard they abandoned me saying with there action that they didn't care. What i had heard wasn't matching up with what I was seeing and when we studied evolution in science it just grew more doubt in me because I'm a logical person who like facts and figure and that what science was unlike Christianity. For a year I played the role of good christian girl but behind it all I was a different person completely. I live in a home with two non-christian parents, one of which give me the impression that she doesn't like me being christian so I'm always afraid to do bible things or pray in my own house, also afraid to pray because God could reject me.
The thing is part of me still reckons there could be a God out there I just don't know where to look anymore because when I look around i see people saying one thing but doing another.
Where can I find the God I hear people talking about the one who loves us and that comforts the hurt in there lowest times. That's the God I want to experience instead of one that you never feel in your heart and appears to disappear completely as soon as the hard time come.