Does anybody get better?

[douglas7]

Greetings siblings in Christ!
I am bipolar for 17 years now.
Lately I just feel like I am never going to get better.
I am overweight and I am not sure I am strong enough
to do what it takes to lose the weight. Life is so
blah on all these pills. Does anybody ever get better?
I wish I could get better.

 

[fireaboss]

Hi Doug! So sorry that you are hurting. From experience, I know how horrible this illness is. As to your question -- yes -- I think we can get better. But it takes A LOT of work. My sister also has bi-polar and she is doing GREAT! She is happier than she has ever been -- she is going to college at 44 -- she barely finished high school. She takes many many meds. Me? I do not get better. My sister did the hard work -- counseling and 12-step recovery. I am just now realzing that I need to do the hard work -- but being so depressed --it's very hard to get started. Well -- it's easy to get started -- for me -- it's hard to stick with it when the depression overpowers me.

I started going to Alanon and I have found much support and kindness there. I'm hoping that working the 12 steps will help me. May God grant you peace and wellness. I will pray for you! Welcome to the board!

 

[Ssarl]

I've suffered from mental illness for three years; primarily I have depression and stress, but I can exhibit just about anything when I have an episode (about once every four days)... mania, schizophrenia, obsessive compulsive, refusal to eat, and any kind of totally uncontrollable emotion (sometimes it's even laughter; I'll just find everything funny for no good reason...). I was sure there was no way out but lacked the guts to commit suicide.

But six months ago I started seeking the Lord's help in this; I made a commitment to do absolutely whatever it took to rid myself of it. This meant multiple psychs and medications (which eventually did absolutely nothing, so I ditched them), and a *lot* of prayer, as well as support from friends.

I am now on the verge of recovery, in an amazingly short space of time! I'm still unwell, but one by one I am saying goodbye to my problems and moving on. I still have episodes, but it's like my mind is starting to run out of ideas, because I'm breaking its legs out from under it - I no longer consider suicide unless OC forces it into my head, among other things. It's got less of a strangehold than it used to.

I'm very sorry to hear that this hasn't happened for you... yet. I can't make this happen for you in the same way it has for me... but I can tell you it's possible.

*huge e-hug*

 

[douglas7]

I've suffered from mental illness for three years; primarily I have depression and stress, but I can exhibit just about anything when I have an episode (about once every four days)... mania, schizophrenia, obsessive compulsive, refusal to eat, and any kind of totally uncontrollable emotion (sometimes it's even laughter; I'll just find everything funny for no good reason...). I was sure there was no way out but lacked the guts to commit suicide.

But six months ago I started seeking the Lord's help in this; I made a commitment to do absolutely whatever it took to rid myself of it. This meant multiple psychs and medications (which eventually did absolutely nothing, so I ditched them), and a *lot* of prayer, as well as support from friends.

I am now on the verge of recovery, in an amazingly short space of time! I'm still unwell, but one by one I am saying goodbye to my problems and moving on. I still have episodes, but it's like my mind is starting to run out of ideas, because I'm breaking its legs out from under it - I no longer consider suicide unless OC forces it into my head, among other things. It's got less of a strangehold than it used to.

I'm very sorry to hear that this hasn't happened for you... yet. I can't make this happen for you in the same way it has for me... but I can tell you it's possible.

*huge e-hug*

Wow! Sounds like you have been through a lot. I'm amazed that you have been able to ditch the meds - I wish I could do that. Every time I try to quit I have problems that get worse. You said you also so psyches - do you mean psychologists? What have they said that was so helpful? Or what has been the most helpful for you in your recovery?

 

[douglas7]

Hi Doug! So sorry that you are hurting. From experience, I know how horrible this illness is. As to your question -- yes -- I think we can get better. But it takes A LOT of work. My sister also has bi-polar and she is doing GREAT! She is happier than she has ever been -- she is going to college at 44 -- she barely finished high school. She takes many many meds. Me? I do not get better. My sister did the hard work -- counseling and 12-step recovery. I am just now realzing that I need to do the hard work -- but being so depressed --it's very hard to get started. Well -- it's easy to get started -- for me -- it's hard to stick with it when the depression overpowers me.

I started going to Alanon and I have found much support and kindness there. I'm hoping that working the 12 steps will help me. May God grant you peace and wellness. I will pray for you! Welcome to the board!

They have a great 12 step recovery program here in town - it is not AA but rather a Christian version of it. The problem is that it seems like to be comfortable in that group - to feel like one is "in the club" one has to have taken illegal street drugs or alcohol - which I have not. I also take many meds - in some ways I am doing all right - but I would like to be well enough for a full time job and to consider myself normal enough to date a normal woman - I would like to be someone that is desireable to women. But I know that I am not desireable because usually when women find out I have mental illness I see their face fall or some indication that they just lost all interest in me romaticly.

 

[Ssarl]

Wow! Sounds like you have been through a lot. I'm amazed that you have been able to ditch the meds - I wish I could do that. Every time I try to quit I have problems that get worse. You said you also so psyches - do you mean psychologists? What have they said that was so helpful? Or what has been the most helpful for you in your recovery?

I ditched the meds for the simple reason that they weren't doing a THING, apart from mild side-effects (or severe side-effects at one point - I had muscle spasms for three days...). It wasn't a touch decision! I was only on them about three months....

Psychologists really didn't do very much for me either. The one thing that did help was prayer. INSANE amounts of prayer! Every single day I talk to God about this, ask Him what I can do to deal. And He helps me immensely. That really is *all* I'm doing to cope - but it's more than sufficient.

I'm not saying ditch the meds, ditch the help - I know that this is different for everybody, and it was only through lack of other options that I ended up so completely dependent on Him. I've definately drawn closer to Him through my recovery.

These last three months I've been in a lonely country town away from my social network, which was my biggest help apart from Him (knowing that my friends cared and having them pray for me made a difference) - by all means I should have gone completely insane. But He's got me through it and I really feel that by the time I get back to the city in March I'm going to be well.

 

[LostnFound]

If you are on meds, I would find a new Pdoc that you like. Sometimes the road to the right med, or combination of meds can be a long one.

The "insane amount of prayer" isn't overstating it, either. I talk to God all the time. I have to lift myself up all the time. I am fairly stable on my meds, but I need the support that one can only get from our Father, every minute of every day!!!

 

[douglas7]

I guess my problem is I want to just pray once and be done with it - I want to be like a normal Christian who prays at times each day but doesn't have to pray all day every day just to get out of bed each morning.

 

[douglas7]

Maybe you prayer warriors out there could pray for me - that I would find my place in this world - and know who I am supposed to date - I have a girlfriend currently ask God to help me be content with her even though I don't feel like I am getting enough out of it and we don't have enough passion. Pray I will either be content with her or know who is right for me, find the right one and have it work out. And pray that I would get a life - with more time with people, helping out or working or anything but all this wasted time alone.

 

[LostnFound]

Sweetie, don't "settle"! If you aren't happy in yur relationship, it's not worth just tolerating.

I will certainly pray for you. But what we mean by praying all the timeisn't necessarily getting down on one knee for 10 or 15 minutes at a time. I talk to God when I'm driving downthe road, when I'm watching TV, when I'm refilling the dog food...etc..

I was sitting on the porch the other day. A cardinal landed in a tree right next to me, and started scoping out my feeder. I took that moment to thank the Father for the wonder of his creation. It was just a beautiful day, and he blessed me with a moment with this cardinal. That's all there was to it.

I was leaving my son's new Middle School, after a conference with his new teachers, and it really went well. As I got in the car, I thanked the Lord for leading us to these wonderful people, who really seemed to care about my child, and asked that he watch over and protect my boy. That's all there was to it.

It's as easy to talk to our Father as it is our best friend!

 

[Jesusfan4ever]

I'm sorry about your illness Doug. I have to take a medication that causes me to gain weight myself. I wonder myself if I'll ever feel better as far as my weight goes. I've been rejected my whole life & it's no fun. I'll certainly keep you in my prayers Feel free to PM me anytime.
.............................................................................................................
God Is AWESOME!

 

[Jesusfan4ever]

I'm sorry about your illness Doug. I have to take a medication that causes me to gain weight myself. I wonder myself if I'll ever feel better as far as my weight goes. I've been rejected my whole life & it's no fun. I'll certainly keep you in my prayers Feel free to PM me anytime.
.............................................................................................................
God Is AWESOME!

 

[pastel]

I guess my problem is I want to just pray once and be done with it - I want to be like a normal Christian who prays at times each day but doesn't have to pray all day every day just to get out of bed each morning.

I don't have this type of problem, but even so I pray just about all day too. Everyone has some type of problem, or sets of problems, and prayer works for everything. Prayer is very powerful. Everyone needs it, and not just people with special needs, or who happen to be on medication. It becomes true that once it becomes a part of the daily routine, that a Christian cannot do without the prayer. With me, I enjoy constant conversation with God.

 

[douglas7]

Actually I do pray a lot - but when I pray "God please get rid of the bothersome thoughts" - they don't go away. When I pray "God please get rid of the mean sounding voice that sounds like my Dad" - it doesn't go away. When I pray "God help me not to feel anxious arround people" - I still feel anxious. It doesn't work for me. Some prayers get answered - but not those.

 

[LostnFound]

Prayer isn't a magic wand, and sometimes God's time isn't our time. Try having a conversation with Him in your mind, instead of a shopping list of requests. It takes practice! Remember, in this instance, you are talking to your "friend", Jesus. It only gets easier!

 

[douglas7]

Prayer isn't a magic wand, and sometimes God's time isn't our time. Try having a conversation with Him in your mind, instead of a shopping list of requests. It takes practice! Remember, in this instance, you are talking to your "friend", Jesus. It only gets easier!

I know how to pray. I don't need practice. I'm quite good at it and I do it often. I resent that you are implying with your words that my suffering is my fault - some failing on my part, perhaps in my prayer style. You are wrong. I have a conviction lately that this is just something God wants me to go through. It is just like with Job. It isn't my fault or God's fault - it is just something God wants me to go through, so I can share in the sufferings of Christ. It will lead to something good eventualy and has already led to some good. I want to be crucified with Christ, as God has ordained. This is just something God wants me go through. Not that I am without sin - of course I have sinned - but this is not a punishment from God even though I deserve punishment - we all do as sinners - but God doesn't always punish us - he usualy forgives instead - in any case this is not a punishment. It is just something God wants me to go through.

 

[LostnFound]

I know how to pray. I don't need practice. I'm quite good at it and I do it often. I resent that you are implying with your words that my suffering is my fault - some failing on my part, perhaps in my prayer style. You are wrong. I have a conviction lately that this is just something God wants me to go through. It is just like with Job. It isn't my fault or God's fault - it is just something God wants me to go through, so I can share in the sufferings of Christ. It will lead to something good eventualy and has already led to some good. I want to be crucified with Christ, as God has ordained. This is just something God wants me go through. Not that I am without sin - of course I have sinned - but this is not a punishment from God even though I deserve punishment - we all do as sinners - but God doesn't always punish us - he usualy forgives instead - in any case this is not a punishment. It is just something God wants me to go through.

OUCH!!!!! No implication inteneded, whatsoever, douglas!!! I was just trying to be encouraging. Brother in Christ...I am swiming in the same ugly ocean you are. My intent was nothing but supportive, and I'm so sorry that you misinterpreted my words! I wish you nothing but the best!!!