Divorce, simply put

[mikesayen]

Simply put:​

We know originally, neither the man, nor the woman (“in the beginning divorce was not so” Matt. 19:8) was allowed to divorce their spouse. Then because of man's heart growing continually hard towards his wife in marriage, Moses gave the man “permission” for a Writ of Divorcement Deuteronomy 24:1. The woman was not allowed to divorce her husband. For Moses understood the woman was made for the man 1 Cor. 11:8-9. ​

A marriage covenant is not abolished until it is done according to God's guidelines in Scripture, otherwise if you marry again you will be committing adultery against your former spouse Matt. 5:32, 19:9, Mark 10:11-12 and Luke 16:18.​

The New Testament now, in no way, contradicts the moral guidelines and doctrines given from the Law of Moses concerning divorce or remarriage (still considered “adultery” if improperly divorced and marries another). That is, of course, other than commanding the Christian not to divorce the unbeliever if they are still willing to remain in the marriage (being now sanctified). And telling the Christian to divorce the unbeliever, if the unbeliever instead wished to separate (for mercies sake to remain in “peace” with the unbeliever 1 Cor. 7:15c). ​

Currently most Christian Churches believe a Christian should not divorce their spouse for 'adultery.' But they allow the believer to divorce if adultery was committed, because of the exception clause that was written concerning the Law in Matt. 19:9. ​

There are many laws in the Law of Moses that permits the men certain rights (like taking on a slave girl and a additional wife Ex. 21:11; or taking captive a woman and making her his wife, or setting her “free” if she does not please you Deut 21:14). Just because the Law of Moses permits a man to do something, this does not mean a Christian shares these same types of permissions. Paul made it clear, a Christian is charged (commanded) by Jesus not to separate, or leave the marriage 1 Cor. 7:10-11. Paul said for man not even to “seek” it 1 Cor. 7:27.​

One may ask, “But what if they broke the marriage covenant, don’t the Scriptures say I have a right to divorce them?”​

Only the man had “permission” to divorce according to the Law. That still holds true for today. If the woman had the right to divorce her husband, under the Law, it would have hinted so: Judges 19:2, Hosea 2:7, Ex. 21:11 (allowed to set her free), Duet. 21:14 (man given the choice to set her free), and like Duet. 22:19, 29 (only the man is ever told by punishments he cannot divorce “all the days of his life&#8221. The woman is presumed to know, by Scripture, she cannot refuse the marriage set by her father (Ex. 22:16-17 and Duet 22:29), nor divorce her husband once married to him (bridal price was paid for her).​

Christians are clearly told by Paul to remain in the marriage, as long as their (unbelieving) spouse is willing to stay (1 Cor. 7:12-13). God also gave, by example, the opportunity for the unfaithful wife to return to His marriage as long as she was willing (“Judah” Jer. 3:9-11). If we are told to endure such things from unbelievers, should we not, the more so, do if believing Christians want to return or remain in their marriage? For, God only divorced unfaithful Israel when she was not willing to return from her “many” lovers Jer. 3:8 (Hosea chap. 2) and still will woo her back, in the last days (Jer 3:14 return back My children, for I am married to you).

​

[FONT=Rockwell, serif]Remember the Law of “divorce” was not given till Moses Deut. 24:1-4. So, there were no divorced women, permitted by God, before this Law. Man had “rule” (“dominion” Rom. 7:1) over his wife due to the fall in Gen. 3:16. Deut. 24:4 indicated though a man was permitted to divorce his wife and marry another, the woman was not allowed to marry another man “as long as he lived.” For if she did marry another man, while he was still living, she would have been called “defiled” (shown also in Matt. 5:32b and 19:9b). And that is why Paul calls this restriction the “law of the husband” Rom. 7:2. [/FONT]

 

[Bible2]

A husband is never to divorce his wife for any reason (1 Corinthians 7:11b), just as a wife is never to divorce her husband for any reason (1 Corinthians 7:10). But if a wife does divorce her husband (such as to escape domestic violence), she must remain unmarried or be reconciled to her husband (1 Corinthians 7:11). A Christian must always completely forgive everyone who has wronged him or her in any way (Mark 11:25), no matter how great the wrong and no matter how many times a wrong has been committed (Matthew 18:21-35). For if a Christian refuses to forgive anyone for anything, God will refuse to forgive that Christian for his or her own sins (Mark 11:26).

God never said that marriage would be easy, and he has set such strict New Covenant/New Testament rules regarding divorce and remarriage (Matthew 19:9, Mark 10:12) that the apostles said that it's better not to get married at all (Matthew 19:10). Jesus answered them by saying that whoever can accept not getting married and remaining celibate should accept it (Matthew 19:11-12). Paul the apostle said the same thing, that unmarried celibacy is the best thing for a Christian if he or she can handle it (1 Corinthians 7:1,7,8,32-35). But if someone who hasn't been married can't contain himself or herself sexually, he or she should get married in order to avoid pre-marital fornication (1 Corinthians 7:2,9).

The only unforgivable sin is blaspheming the Holy Spirit, such as by ascribing a work of the Holy Spirit to the devil (Mark 3:22-30). Any other sin can be forgiven if it isn't continued in and is confessed to God (1 John 1:9). Just as if Christians find themselves living in the sin of an adulterous affair, they can't continue in that sin, so if they find themselves living in the sin of second-marriage adultery (Mark 10:12, Matthew 19:9), they can't continue in that sin (or any other sin) and expect God's grace to forgive them (Hebrews 10:26-29, Galatians 5:19-21, 1 Corinthians 6:9-11). They must break off with the second spouse, even if they've had children with the second spouse, just as married people must break off an adulterous affair, even if they've had children as a result of that affair.

After breaking off an adulterous second marriage, a wife doesn't have to go back to her first husband: she can remain unmarried if she can't be reconciled to her first husband (1 Corinthians 7:11). But she can't marry someone else, even if, for example, marrying someone else would help her and her children to escape poverty. For just as escaping poverty wouldn't justify the wife continuing in the sin of an adulterous affair with a man who financially supports her and her children (or wouldn't justify the sin of her becoming and remaining a well-paid prostitute), so escaping poverty wouldn't justify the sin of her entering into another case of second-marriage adultery with a man who financially supports her and her children.

Romans 3:31 means that Christians establish the Mosaic law not in its letter, but in its spirit (Romans 7:6), by loving others (Romans 13:8-10, Galatians 5:14). Part of loving others is warning them if they are living in sin (Revelation 3:19, 1 Corinthians 5:1-13 & 2 Corinthians 2:6-8, 2 Thessalonians 3:15, Hebrews 3:13, James 5:19-20). The worst thing a Christian can do is to coddle people who are living in sin, instead of sharing with them the hard truths of God's word (2 Timothy 4:2-4, cf. Jeremiah 23:14,22,29). Telling the truth to people can sometimes hurt them, but that's better than deceiving them with something that makes them feel good (Proverbs 27:6, Proverbs 28:23). The reason that second-marriage adultery (or any other sin) is so common in the church today is because so much of the church has stopped preaching and believing the hard truths of God's word (2 Timothy 4:2-4, cf. Jeremiah 23:14,22,29).

 

[Uphill Battle]

I knew something was missing from CF lately... the "if you've remarried, break it off, repent sinner!" threads.

 

[solarwave]

I seem to put 'never divorce' under the unrealistic category along with "gouging your eyes out".

 

[sunlover1]

I seem to put 'never divorce' under the unrealistic category along with "gouging your eyes out".

Even as "unrealistic" as , "Go and SIN NO MORE"
lol
But He (God) did mean what he said, no?
We take sin lightly and we take marriage lightly.

Marriage is a blood covenant and God is serious about "covenant"
(Good thing for us!) as we can see here:

13"This is another thing you do: you cover the altar of the LORD with tears,

with weeping and with groaning, because He no longer regards the offering

or accepts it with favor from your hand.


14"Yet you say, 'For what reason?'

Because the LORD has been a witness between you and the wife of your youth,

against whom you have dealt treacherously,

though she is your companion and your wife By COVENANT.

 

[Yab Yum]

I seem to put 'never divorce' under the unrealistic category along with "gouging your eyes out".

Or the with God anything is possible category?

 

[solarwave]

Even as "unrealistic" as , "Go and SIN NO MORE"
lol
But He (God) did mean what he said, no?
We take sin lightly and we take marriage lightly.

Marriage is a blood covenant and God is serious about "covenant"
(Good thing for us!) as we can see here:

13"This is another thing you do: you cover the altar of the LORD with tears,

with weeping and with groaning, because He no longer regards the offering

or accepts it with favor from your hand.


14"Yet you say, 'For what reason?'

Because the LORD has been a witness between you and the wife of your youth,

against whom you have dealt treacherously,

though she is your companion and your wife By COVENANT.

I know marriage is important, I don't deny that, but it is possible marry the wrong person and for it to be very wrong.

I also accept I am ignorant on this subject too though.

Or the with God anything is possible category?

When I become God I'll start doing the impossible then

 

[myways]

Does Christ divorce us? No. Therefore, we must not divorce each other. That's as far as it goes.
However, if your hard heart makes your marriage to your spouse more evil than living seperately, then divorce is permitted, (that is, to save the spouse from yourself.)

 

[sunlover1]

I know marriage is important, I don't deny that, but it is possible marry the wrong person and for it to be very wrong.

I agree with you solarwave.

I also accept I am ignorant on this subject too though

.
Same here ... me too.

Does Christ divorce us? No. Therefore, we must not divorce each other. That's as far as it goes.
However, if your hard heart makes your marriage to your spouse more evil than living seperately, then divorce is permitted, (that is, to save the spouse from yourself.)

So that's how that works!
How sad

 

[solarwave]

Does Christ divorce us? No. Therefore, we must not divorce each other. That's as far as it goes.
However, if your hard heart makes your marriage to your spouse more evil than living seperately, then divorce is permitted, (that is, to save the spouse from yourself.)

I'm not sure that logic works out with others things though, for example if we can do to others only what Christ does to us it would mean we can't have sex.

 

[98cwitr]

We are not under the Old but under the New. Therefore, let us realize that other than adultery, there is no reason for a man or a woman to seek a divorce for any reason. What God has joined let man not separate.

Divorce is not permissible in the Christian culture unless there is infidelity...period, it is sin. Double that in the act of re-marriage to another, because you have now committed adultery.

A man is only as good as his word. If you cannot keep your vows, to love, honor, and cherish FOREVER, then what are you worth? Remember what has happened to those who have broken vows to God. When you are marrying, you are not just making a vow to your spouse, you make a vow to God. Breaking those vows and then being unrepentant of them, because you refuse to acknowledge sin for what it is, will have dire consequences.

 

[myways]

The only reason to divorce your spouse is because of your own spiritual wickedness. In that case, by all means rush to get divorced. However, it is never permissible on the grounds that he/she has done something to you that is legitimately divorcible; even (or rather, especially, infidelity.)

Also, we may be under the New Law, but in a sense it is far more restrictive than the Old. In the case of marriage it is: follow the example you have been given.

If you can't follow Christ's example, then you're sinning.

If you could go back in time and marry that carpenter's boy from Nazereth, what would it take to get him to divorce you?

 

[Uphill Battle]

The only reason to divorce your spouse is because of your own spiritual wickedness. In that case, by all means rush to get divorced. However, it is never permissible on the grounds that he/she has done something to you that is legitimately divorcible; even (or rather, especially, infidelity.)

Also, we may be under the New Law, but in a sense it is far more restrictive than the Old. In the case of marriage it is: follow the example you have been given.

If you can't follow Christ's example, then you're sinning.

If you could go back in time and marry that carpenter's boy from Nazereth, what would it take to get him to divorce you?

hmmm.... I was married, she left. We got divorced. I am now married to a good and godly woman in my second marriage. God has blessed us richly since that point. In fact, my life was a shambles from my first marriage.

this does not mean I believe that divorce isn't a bad thing. I had no intentions of ending my first marriage.

but there you have it.

 

[MamaZ]

Same here.. My first marriage was an abusive situation. My second marriage has been so blessed and my children from my first marriage are more secure and know they are loved dearly

 

[myways]

Hmmm.... Those are good thoughts. There is no reason why God wouldn't bless a second, third, forth...marriage.

 

[sunlover1]

The only reason to divorce your spouse is because of your own spiritual wickedness. In that case, by all means rush to get divorced. However, it is never permissible on the grounds that he/she has done something to you that is legitimately divorcible; even (or rather, especially, infidelity.)

I appreciate your zealousness for covenant!
But what if?????

For instance, what about anullment?
What about abuse? (we risk our lives to keep a covenant? is there nothing
higher than covenant?)

Also, we may be under the New Law, but in a sense it is far more restrictive than the Old. In the case of marriage it is: follow the example you have been given.

Restriction and liberty are opposites no?
Higher standard yes.. walking by the Spirit rather than the law.
Restrictive.. wouldn't that be dependent on one's perspective?

 

[myways]

I certainly think that a separation is in order for alot of situations, like abuse.

Second, sunlover, you are right about my word choice. "Restrictive" was a poor choice. I simply meant that as Christians, we have a clearer definition of right and wrong in the teaching of Christ, and can't get away in ignorance the way we might have before.

 

[from scratch]

Don't ya feel sorry for Adam? Or maybe Eve?

 

[sunlover1]

I certainly think that a separation is in order for alot of situations, like abuse.

True. I had forgotten about separation.

Second, sunlover, you are right about my word choice. "Restrictive" was a poor choice. I simply meant that as Christians, we have a clearer definition of right and wrong in the teaching of Christ, and can't get away in ignorance the way we might have before.

Amen.
And God in us, giving us grace and strength to walk in love and peace in the midst of babylon....
But He also gave us a mind and choices.
For instance, one may not be overtly "abused" yet may be dying inside from years
of veiled contempt and lack of care .. that's so unhealthy. kwim?

Don't ya feel sorry for Adam? Or maybe Eve?

Eve fo sho.

Just kidding.
Why? they sort of had it made lol.

 

[HAPMinistries]

Lol

Well, my first wife was having an affair, and refused to stop, so I filed for divorce.

I always prayed she would come back to God and me.

Sadly, she came back to God, then married the person whom she was having the affair with without ever trying to reconcile her marriage to me. This makes me wonder what did she repent of?

Being hurt by this, I was not thinking clearly when I met a woman who told me everything I wanted to hear, and pretended to be everything I wanted. After we were married I found out she was a very hard drug abuser, abusive in nature, and would leave and disappear for days.

I found emails and got voice messages of men confessing their undying love for my wife...

Again, I faced a woman having affairs and refusing to stop, so when she made a rendezvous with one of her lovers, i packed my bags and left.


You can not have an idea about what divorce is until you understand what marriage is.

Both of these women promised to be true to me in good times and in bad, in sickness and in health. To love me and honor me all the days of their life. To have and to hold, from this day forward, for better, for worse, for richer, for poorer, in sickness and in health, until death do us part, they promised to me.

Neither kept their promise.
That is divorce 'simply put'.