Define "Hell" [fun thread]

[Pogue]

Imagine getting invited to somebody's house, being offered coffee....



....




AND IT'S DECAFF!! ARRRRGHHH!

 

[D.W.Washburn]

Remember the Farside cartoon of hell with the caption:

"They thought of everything. The coffee's cold."

 

[UberLutheran]

This happened back 30 years ago when my sister and I were in college.

I had started going out with this guy, who turned out to be bisexual; but since we were becoming involved, he decided to commit to me.

My sister told me she had started going out with a really nice guy and they were becoming involved. I was quite happy for her.

To make a long story short: it turned out we had both become involved with the same guy -- and neither one of us knew about his involvement with the other!

Next on "Springer"...

 

[Pogue]

I found a poem

You'll be greeted
by a nice cup of coffee
when you get to heaven
and strains of angelic harmony.

But wouldn't you be devastated
if they only serve decaffeinated
while from the percolators of hell

your soul was assaulted
by Satan's fresh espresso smell?

-- John Agard

 

[BAFRIEND]

This happened back 30 years ago when my sister and I were in college.

I had started going out with this guy, who turned out to be bisexual; but since we were becoming involved, he decided to commit to me.

My sister told me she had started going out with a really nice guy and they were becoming involved. I was quite happy for her.

To make a long story short: it turned out we had both become involved with the same guy -- and neither one of us knew about his involvement with the other!

Next on "Springer"...

You could have been an uncle and a step father at the same time.

An old boss of mine once became a father and grand father on the same day after he seperated from his wife and then had an affair and moved in with his step-daughter.

 

[Wednesday]

Hell is when I'm out of coffee.

 

[Aquamarine81]

Being forced to attend Westboro Baptist Church and join their protests.

Those people are living in their own little hell, I tell you.

 

[spinningtutu]

yeah I second that one...

howabout this one:
Hell is having to endure PMS without chocolate to binge on...

 

[Sitswithamouse]

Being forced to attend Westboro Baptist Church and join their protests.

Those people are living in their own little hell, I tell you.

Just being in the same room with them.

AAARRGGHHH!!!!

 

[DeanM]

Being forced to attend Westboro Baptist Church and join their protests.

Those people are living in their own little hell, I tell you.

Didn't the courts strip them of all their assets and bus their naked butts Philly?

 

[.Sabre.]

This happened back 30 years ago when my sister and I were in college.

I had started going out with this guy, who turned out to be bisexual; but since we were becoming involved, he decided to commit to me.

My sister told me she had started going out with a really nice guy and they were becoming involved. I was quite happy for her.

To make a long story short: it turned out we had both become involved with the same guy -- and neither one of us knew about his involvement with the other!

Next on "Springer"...

You live in the South.


(not meaning to offend any Southerners here)

 

[.Sabre.]

Being forced to attend Westboro Baptist Church and join their protests.

Those people are living in their own little hell, I tell you.

If I were in proximity to one of them, I think I might go berserk.

 

[Maranatha27]

Being an unbeliever, tortured by insurgent in Iraq, the going to the literal hell that the Bible speaks of.

 

[Domenico]

Being forced to attend Westboro Baptist Church and join their protests.

Those people are living in their own little hell, I tell you.

Im not sure if its worse being around them, or being them. Hating that much cant be good for you.

 

[Athene]

It isn't?????

I'm confused, Athene. What are some "other" countries in the world -- and if they actually are independent countries, what must the U.S. do to acquire them?


[just kidding!!!]

The 'they've got WMDs and they're going to use them against us' strategy seems to be working well so far.

Seriously, Athene: what towns might be considered "dinky" (in the Sheffield, TX sense of the word -- sans prickly pear cactus and mesquite trees, of course!) in Great Britain?

Well, we'd call towns that small villages and there are loads of them dotted all around the UK. The funny thing is though even in the smallest village, too small to have a post office or even a small corner shop you'll find at least one pub, more often then not there will be two.

 

[.Sabre.]

In my village, there are 3 pubs that I know of, 2 churches and lots of crazy people who would not take kindly to me actually wearing a biker outfit and fruit hat.


Though they don't mind guys in feather boas.

 

[Wednesday]

Hell, is trying to sort out a bucket load of things. I've got to fill out forms, sort out first semester, sort out the year after I come back from exchange, sort out my year on exchange. There are too many forms, too many things to think about and consider, I'm so confused. I am in hell at the moment.

 

[Pogue]

Hell, is trying to sort out a bucket load of things. I've got to fill out forms, sort out first semester, sort out the year after I come back from exchange, sort out my year on exchange. There are too many forms, too many things to think about and consider, I'm so confused. I am in hell at the moment.

It sounds like we are in the same boat, or at least a very similar boat. I'm trying to sort out getting a job abroad next year, and then going back to uni for my final year. It's very confusing and sometimes difficult to cope with everything.

 

[BBgrey]

Hmmm...I think my ultimate hell would be perpetual tasks involving the use of saran wrap.

 

[Abbadon]

Hmmm...I think my ultimate hell would be perpetual tasks involving the use of saran wrap.

Especially if they managed to create a form of saran wrap that can affect your fingers in a manner similar to trying to hammer a nail without a head (my poor thumb! I just got through putting at nail in some particularly thick and heavy wall).