Dealing with Regret

[Gentle Lamb]

What do you do when you find yourself regretful about a situation that you can't change? How do you move forward? Like you had the opportunity to address it years ago, but you maybe never took your thought or feelings about a situation seriously enough to make changes about the situation. Years later you find yourself regretful about the way things have turned out. What do you do?

 

[Norbert L]

What do you do when you find yourself regretful about a situation that you can't change? How do you move forward? Like you had the opportunity to address it years ago, but you maybe never took your thought or feelings about a situation seriously enough to make changes about the situation. Years later you find yourself regretful about the way things have turned out. What do you do?

Philippians 3
"Brothers and sisters, I do not consider myself yet to have taken hold of it. But one thing I do: Forgetting what is behind and straining toward what is ahead, I press on toward the goal to win the prize for which God has called me heavenward in Christ Jesus."

 

[Rene Loup]

Learn from it, but NEVER dwell on it.

 

[Rescued One]

Join the human race after you've talked to God and asked His forgiveness. We can't change others or even expect humans to forgive us. You aren't alone! The regret we feel will help us to not judge those who hurt us deeply. We want sympathy --- I do. Even then, those we think will provide it may only point out that you and I are human and have hurt others. OUCH!

Find ways to help others who are hurting or rejected.

Philippians 4
Finally, brethren, whatsoever things are true, whatsoever things are honest, whatsoever things are just, whatsoever things are pure, whatsoever things are lovely, whatsoever things are of good report; if there be any virtue, and if there be any praise, think on these things.

 

[St_Worm2]

Hello @Gentle Lamb, if there is really no going back and fixing things at this point, then all you can do is ask God for His forgiveness (for not doing what you know that you should have done), forget about it* and move on (which I see that everyone else has basically said too).

*(the one caveat being this, keep what happened in the back of your mind to remind yourself to never do it again)

There are two peccadillos in my life that I failed to repent of and fix when I became a Christian 34 years ago that I do not believe can be still be fixed today (they could have been 34 years ago). I'm glad that I don't think about them all the time, but I'm also glad that they are still there in the back of my mind to remind me so that I do not fail to settle matters that need to be settled in a timely manner again.

God bless you!

--David

 

[Gentle Lamb]

It's not a matter of sin to be repented of, but I will try to do what I can to move forward. I am in the middle of the situation and it's not easy to get out of it. But I will do what I can. Thanks.

 

[bèlla]

Several years ago I met someone. We hit it off and I really liked him. But I never said it. I kept it to myself. We didn’t get together and I regretted my silence. It gnawed at me for a long time.

I made a promise that day that I’ve maintained. I don’t hold back. I share my heart, concerns, and address challenges as needed. I won’t live with regret again.

If I’ve done what I can to assist or provide a remedy that’s enough. The absence of change doesn’t minimize my contribution and my conscience is clear. I can’t help everyone or resolve every problem. My effort isn’t unnoticed by the One who matters most. He sees my heart.

Yours in His Service,

~bella

 

[Tolworth John]

It's not a matter of sin to be repented of, but I will try to do what I can to move forward. I am in the middle of the situation and it's not easy to get out of it. But I will do what I can. Thanks.

Your opening post said the situation was years ago, now it is current!

Depending on what the situation is one still has to be open and honest. Admitting to your boss you've screwed up in such and such a situation.
Apologising to anyone you have embarrassed or you've made a fool of yourself in front of.

Accept that you will be very venerable doing this, but you have to act to sort out what ever it is you regret, even if that means burrying your unrequited love for someone else.
You have to let the situation go.

 

[disciple Clint]

What do you do when you find yourself regretful about a situation that you can't change? How do you move forward? Like you had the opportunity to address it years ago, but you maybe never took your thought or feelings about a situation seriously enough to make changes about the situation. Years later you find yourself regretful about the way things have turned out. What do you do?

Often times, unfortunately too often, I do not have to wait years to know that I have done or said something that I regret. If the person is still available to me I apologize. Later and if the person is not available to me, I ask God to cause something good to happen as a result of my inappropriate actions and to bless the person that I have harmed. I then ask myself why I did what I did so that I can learn not to do it in the future, then fully understanding what I did, I ask God to forgive me. Then I look for an opportunity in the future to quietly do something to bless the person I have harmed or to bless someone else.

 

[Gentle Lamb]

Your opening post said the situation was years ago, now it is current!

Depending on what the situation is one still has to be open and honest. Admitting to your boss you've screwed up in such and such a situation.
Apologising to anyone you have embarrassed or you've made a fool of yourself in front of.

Accept that you will be very venerable doing this, but you have to act to sort out what ever it is you regret, even if that means burrying your unrequited love for someone else.
You have to let the situation go.

The opening post said I had the opportunity to do something about this years ago... Now we are in the present and I am facing the situation and seeing all that has happened, wondering how do I extricate myself and how to move forward from here. Extricating myself is the hardest part.... You are right, I will have to take some actions to sort this out.

 

[Gentle Lamb]

If I’ve done what I can to assist or provide a remedy that’s enough. The absence of change doesn’t minimize my contribution and my conscience is clear. I can’t help everyone or resolve every problem. My effort isn’t unnoticed by the One who matters most. He sees my heart.

Yours in His Service,

~bella

Thank you for your words of wisdom Bella. I have done what I can to remedy the situation. Overall it is not my responsibility to make changes. Thank you for reminding me that God sees my efforts and heart. I have tried.

 

[longwait]

What do you do when you find yourself regretful about a situation that you can't change? How do you move forward? Like you had the opportunity to address it years ago, but you maybe never took your thought or feelings about a situation seriously enough to make changes about the situation. Years later you find yourself regretful about the way things have turned out. What do you do?

Accept your fate and bear it. There is not much you can do about it. What's done cannot be undone. Sounds like my life. You are right, its not easy to get out of even if you want to. Almost impossible.

 

[Gentle Lamb]

Often times, unfortunately too often, I do not have to wait years to know that I have done or said something that I regret. If the person is still available to me I apologize. Later and if the person is not available to me, I ask God to cause something good to happen as a result of my inappropriate actions and to bless the person that I have harmed. I then ask myself why I did what I did so that I can learn not to do it in the future, then fully understanding what I did, I ask God to forgive me. Then I look for an opportunity in the future to quietly do something to bless the person I have harmed or to bless someone else.

This is good in terms of ways we offend other people. This isn't about personally offending anyone else. But I have been praying for the people that I've sinned against, praying that God will heal them and minister to heal from the ways that I've hurt them. This helpful, thank you.

 

[Gentle Lamb]

Accept your fate and bear it. There is not much you can do about it. What's done cannot be undone. Sounds like my life. You are right, its not easy to get out of even if you want to.

You're right, what's done cannot be undone. I accept the past and I am trying to move on from here.

 

[Gentle Lamb]

Philippians 3
"Brothers and sisters, I do not consider myself yet to have taken hold of it. But one thing I do: Forgetting what is behind and straining toward what is ahead, I press on toward the goal to win the prize for which God has called me heavenward in Christ Jesus."

Thank you for reminding me of the word of God. I watched a video yesterday where I was reminded "don't look back" and I was reminded of Lot's wife. I can't change the past, but given that I am still in the middle of things now it's a matter of extricating myself and how do I move forward.