Dates - not the fruit

[Paradoxum]

How many people think men should pay for the first date? Or dates in general?

I genuinely didn't know this was an issue till recently. Apparently I've been living under a rock and so was very much astonished.

I assumed if you eat something you pay for it... because real life?

But apparently some men think they are superior to women. I meant some woman think their dates SHOULD be paid for by men, that's different.

Is this a general rule I should remember? I feel weird that I grew up thinking boys where people like me.

(Points of consideration: lesbians, gay men, and women asking men out).

 

[CRAZY_CAT_WOMAN]

How many people think men should pay for the first date? Or dates in general?

I genuinely didn't know this was an issue till recently. Apparently I've been living under a rock and was very much astonished.

I assumed if you eat something you pay for it... because real life?

But apparently some men think they are superior to women. I meant some woman think think their dates SHOULD be paid for by men, that's different.

Is this a general rule I should remember? I feel weird that I grew up thinking boys where people like me.

I'm sorry. But if a man cant afford to take me out. They will eat nothing . They are screwed. I'm very flexible. I will except corn dogs and wine at his place. But I expect for him to pay. But if you're into both paying. Maybe he could pay the first meal , you can pay the next meal. Or bring a calculator and split the meal and tip.

 

[Paradoxum]

I'm sorry. But if a man cant afford to take me out. They will eat nothing . They are screwed. I'm very flexible. I will except corn dogs and wine at his place.

I'm not sure what you really mean, or if you're joking.

 

[Jack of Spades]

How many people think men should pay for the first date? Or dates in general?

I genuinely didn't know this was an issue till recently. Apparently I've been living under a rock and so was very much astonished.

I assumed if you eat something you pay for it... because real life?

But apparently some men think they are superior to women. I meant some woman think their dates SHOULD be paid for by men, that's different.

Is this a general rule I should remember? I feel weird that I grew up thinking boys where people like me.

(Points of consideration: lesbians, gay men, and women asking men out).

You girls ain't gettin my money!

I guess the idea of a man paying as a rule, is a symbolical gesture to suggest that he's a good provider, in a society where a man is expected to provide. If man is not expected to be the provider, as a matter of gender role, there is little point to such gestures.

 

[CRAZY_CAT_WOMAN]

I'm not sure what you really mean, or if you're joking.

I'm poor and serious. Maybe I could take him to taco bell. But I expect him to buy me wine.

 

[CRAZY_CAT_WOMAN]

But if you're into both paying. Maybe he could pay the first meal , you can pay the next meal. Or bring a calculator and split the meal and tip.

 

[Paradoxum]

You girls ain't gettin my money!

But I need it to want a closer relationship... that doesn't make me a prostitute.

I guess the idea of a man paying as a rule, is a symbolical gesture to suggest that he's a good provider, in a society where a man is expected to provide. If man is not expected to be the provider, as a matter of gender role, there is little point to such gestures.

Don't you think this would be better shown by killing an deer with a spear? How will I know you can provide for helpless me otherwise?

 

[Paradoxum]

I'm poor and serious. Maybe I could take him to taco bell. But I expect him to buy me wine.

I totally get having little money. I'm just not assuming he has more. And we don't have to go to Italy to have dinner.

 

[ewq1938]

If both have jobs, each pay their own way. If one is not employed and the other is then the employed should pay. If neither is employed they could go to a food bank then make a small cooking fire in an abandoned wooded area and see what they can make out of what they got.

 

[Paradoxum]

But if you're into both paying. Maybe he could pay the first meal , you can pay the next meal. Or bring a calculator and split the meal and tip.

Splitting seems equal on every initial date.

But if you're in a relationship, taking turns seems like a good idea, in my opinion.

 

[Paradoxum]

If both have jobs, each pay their own way. If one is not employed and the other is then the employed should pay. If neither is employed they could go to a food bank then make a small cooking fire in an abandoned wooded area and see what they can make out of what they got.

Baked beans for everyone!

 

[CRAZY_CAT_WOMAN]

I totally get having little money. I'm just not assuming he has more. And we don't have to go to Italy to have dinner.

Yes, I don't care about the rich guy. I want a good guy. So an expensive dinner doesn't mean much.

 

[Jack of Spades]

But I need it to want a closer relationship... that doesn't make me a prostitute.

You're not supposed to say that out loud, you know. I am comfortable with being robbed and economically abused, but I expect to be given the right to imagine that it's not a trade deal.

Don't you think this would be better shown by killing an deer with a spear? How will I know you can provide for helpless me otherwise?

Uhhh, how about a reindeer? We have more of those over here in north.

 

[CRAZY_CAT_WOMAN]

Baked beans for everyone!

I love baked beans on my hot dogs. My cousin excepts these expensive meals. She ends up with A holes. I rather skip that.

 

[ewq1938]

I love baked beans on my hot dogs.

I'm kind of the opposite. I prefer hot dogs on my baked beans.

 

[Ana the Ist]

How many people think men should pay for the first date? Or dates in general?

I genuinely didn't know this was an issue till recently. Apparently I've been living under a rock and so was very much astonished.

I assumed if you eat something you pay for it... because real life?

But apparently some men think they are superior to women. I meant some woman think their dates SHOULD be paid for by men, that's different.

Is this a general rule I should remember? I feel weird that I grew up thinking boys where people like me.

(Points of consideration: lesbians, gay men, and women asking men out).

I always considered paying for the date as a matter of "her getting something out of it". After all, I'm going to try and have sex with her...and if she has to put up with that, she should at least get a free meal out of it.

 

[Dave-W]

The guy should pay - for all of it. With no expectation of anything in return.

And no Ana - sex while dating should NEVER be expected. That is reserved for after you get married.

 

[Skavau]

The guy should pay - for all of it. With no expectation of anything in return.

And no Ana - sex while dating should NEVER be expected. That is reserved for after you get married.

Do /you/ live under a rock?

 

[Jack of Spades]

The guy should pay - for all of it.

Why? Reasons? Logic? Goal? Pros, cons?

 

[Dave-W]

Do /you/ live under a rock?

Yes. That rock is Christ. 1 Cor 10.4b.