Hello it has been a while since I posted on this site. But here we go' I am having problems staying straight and sober. I was straight for 5 years and then 2 years ago I took a drink and when I drink it always tells me to smoke crack, alcohol and crack go hand and hand with me. I also cheat on my significant when I am smoking crack it makes me crave women. I have been saved for about 20 years and I know the Word. While I was clean I was on my churches drug and alcohol outreach ministry, and then I turn around and go back out there. Last night I was back out there getting high and with a strange women. the guilt that I feel today is killing me. I didn't even pay my car note. I am so tired of this' but I keep going back to it, I will stay clean for 3 months here 6 months there 4 months there only to go back to it. satan is fighting me real hard because he and his demons know that I can be a power house for God. I feel so alone right now and my depression is through the roof and I am bipolar which just makes things worse. I need somebody to talk to me, I was so depressed about what I did last night until I wanted to kill myself. I kept telling my fiancee that death is better than this. I don't know how much more that I can take of this. Turning my back on God has some very bad consequences, like the Bible says the latter is worse than the beginning. It is time for this garbage to stop. Somebody please talk to me.
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Crack & Alcohol
- Thread starter SpankyW2
- Start date
Yes I have not fasted in years' but when I use to I became very strong' fasting for one or 2 days when I did it one time 3 days. When you don't do things God's way you will fail' and I know that. And ladyjazz I thank you so much it is a good feeling to have somebody reach out to you. I should be able to talk later or tomorrow right now angry, sad, guilty, and confused. My brain is going in a a thousand directions and I get like this it is hard for me to talk to other humans, I guess being bipolar has something to do with that to. But I must believe that through Jesus I can overcome this again.
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One of the more common themes in university students' bipolar stories is the role that substance use has had in the course of their disorder. Sometimes it's simply part of the stormy adolescence that precedes their diagnosis. For others, it's more a part of the storm that follows. But either way it's almost never a helpful or curative part of their narrative.
The explanation of why alcohol and drugs don't mix well with bipolar disorder isn't simple. It really needs to be considered from multiple perspectives.
First, it's fairly obvious that the introduction of mind altering chemicals into the brain doesn't exactly help to sustain mental stability. With almost all recreational drugs there is some kind of "high" associated with experience. That's why people do it. But following any substance induced high, there's almost always the experience of coming down. And usually that translates into a "low" mood feeling.
Think of how you feel the morning after being intoxicated, or four to five hours after smoking pot or snorting cocaine. It's usually not a pleasurable experience. The problem is that the anticipation of feeling low is not apparent for the individual at the time that he or she desires the high. Whoever thinks ... "I want to feel hung over and depressed so I'm going to drink some alcohol." Obviously if most individuals applied an objective analysis of the outcomes of substance use, then most wouldn't drink or get high.
But when we're pleasure seeking or perhaps just trying to get rid of uncomfortable feelings, the thought processes leading to our choices aren't necessarily rational or balanced. In fact, for those with bipolar disorder who struggle with mood instability, the use of drugs and alcohol only adds to the ups and downs. It absolutely doesn't smooth them out.
And then there's the seductive and dangerous element of disinhibition, particularly in relation to alcohol. Alcohol lowers inhibitions. That's partly why it feels so good. The shy or insecure person gets to be more outgoing and confident. The person who's too tightly wrapped gets to let loose and be stupid. And the person who's chronically anxious and fearful gets to relax.
So what's wrong with disinhibition?
Well nothing really, if you're able to apply good judgment and adequate impulse control. You can drink some, enjoy your time with friends and usually return to the normal rhythms of your life. The problem is that everyone with bipolar disorder intermittently becomes hypomanic or manic. It's what defines the diagnosis. And in these elevated mood states, bipolar individuals almost always experience some degree of impaired impulse control. During the elevated mood phase they're usually feeling up, energized, gregarious and cognitively accelerated. The problem is that once their mood extends above the mildly elevated range, they often lose the capacity to modulate or turn down their mood-related intensity. It's like the wheels of hypomania become lubricated and they keep picking up speed.
That's what's wrong with alcohol-related disinhibition. It further greases the wheels of elevated mood. The challenge faced by those with bipolar disorder is one of figuring out how to do the opposite. They've got to become skillful at applying the brakes and slowing back down to a healthy speed.
In the weekly bipolar support group that I lead, university students frequently speak of the danger that alcohol represents for them. One student likened it to throwing some gasoline on a slow burning fire. When she drinks, she usually wants to drink more; and when she does, she almost always become destabilized - either upward, downward or both.
If university students with bipolar disorder could be successful just having a beer or perhaps a glass of wine, then I don't think most would be adversely affected by doing so. However, that's a big if!
Often within the culture of late adolescence and young adulthood, drinking isn't just for the mild relaxation from a bottle of beer or the taste of a good glass of wine. Drinking usually occurs in social settings where the intent is to become buzzed, if not fully intoxicated. Furthermore, peer pressure to participate makes it very difficult to put on the brakes.
Over my 20+ years of working with university students, I've probably seen more than 150 bipolar students. I don't think I've ever seen someone with bipolar disorder who was appreciative of the role that drugs or alcohol had in their life. Their narratives unfold in the opposite direction. And for those who have benefited from their difficult life lessons and have been successful in curtailing their drug and alcohol use, they almost always report increased mood stability.
It's pretty simple. If you want to live well with bipolar disorder, then drugs and alcohol don't factor into the equation.
Russ Federman is Director of Counseling and Psychological Services at the University of Virginia.
The explanation of why alcohol and drugs don't mix well with bipolar disorder isn't simple. It really needs to be considered from multiple perspectives.
First, it's fairly obvious that the introduction of mind altering chemicals into the brain doesn't exactly help to sustain mental stability. With almost all recreational drugs there is some kind of "high" associated with experience. That's why people do it. But following any substance induced high, there's almost always the experience of coming down. And usually that translates into a "low" mood feeling.
Think of how you feel the morning after being intoxicated, or four to five hours after smoking pot or snorting cocaine. It's usually not a pleasurable experience. The problem is that the anticipation of feeling low is not apparent for the individual at the time that he or she desires the high. Whoever thinks ... "I want to feel hung over and depressed so I'm going to drink some alcohol." Obviously if most individuals applied an objective analysis of the outcomes of substance use, then most wouldn't drink or get high.
But when we're pleasure seeking or perhaps just trying to get rid of uncomfortable feelings, the thought processes leading to our choices aren't necessarily rational or balanced. In fact, for those with bipolar disorder who struggle with mood instability, the use of drugs and alcohol only adds to the ups and downs. It absolutely doesn't smooth them out.
And then there's the seductive and dangerous element of disinhibition, particularly in relation to alcohol. Alcohol lowers inhibitions. That's partly why it feels so good. The shy or insecure person gets to be more outgoing and confident. The person who's too tightly wrapped gets to let loose and be stupid. And the person who's chronically anxious and fearful gets to relax.
So what's wrong with disinhibition?
Well nothing really, if you're able to apply good judgment and adequate impulse control. You can drink some, enjoy your time with friends and usually return to the normal rhythms of your life. The problem is that everyone with bipolar disorder intermittently becomes hypomanic or manic. It's what defines the diagnosis. And in these elevated mood states, bipolar individuals almost always experience some degree of impaired impulse control. During the elevated mood phase they're usually feeling up, energized, gregarious and cognitively accelerated. The problem is that once their mood extends above the mildly elevated range, they often lose the capacity to modulate or turn down their mood-related intensity. It's like the wheels of hypomania become lubricated and they keep picking up speed.
That's what's wrong with alcohol-related disinhibition. It further greases the wheels of elevated mood. The challenge faced by those with bipolar disorder is one of figuring out how to do the opposite. They've got to become skillful at applying the brakes and slowing back down to a healthy speed.
In the weekly bipolar support group that I lead, university students frequently speak of the danger that alcohol represents for them. One student likened it to throwing some gasoline on a slow burning fire. When she drinks, she usually wants to drink more; and when she does, she almost always become destabilized - either upward, downward or both.
If university students with bipolar disorder could be successful just having a beer or perhaps a glass of wine, then I don't think most would be adversely affected by doing so. However, that's a big if!
Often within the culture of late adolescence and young adulthood, drinking isn't just for the mild relaxation from a bottle of beer or the taste of a good glass of wine. Drinking usually occurs in social settings where the intent is to become buzzed, if not fully intoxicated. Furthermore, peer pressure to participate makes it very difficult to put on the brakes.
Over my 20+ years of working with university students, I've probably seen more than 150 bipolar students. I don't think I've ever seen someone with bipolar disorder who was appreciative of the role that drugs or alcohol had in their life. Their narratives unfold in the opposite direction. And for those who have benefited from their difficult life lessons and have been successful in curtailing their drug and alcohol use, they almost always report increased mood stability.
It's pretty simple. If you want to live well with bipolar disorder, then drugs and alcohol don't factor into the equation.
Russ Federman is Director of Counseling and Psychological Services at the University of Virginia.
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epluribus36
Follower of Jesus
I'd say get around people who are straight and sober as much as possible. Of course that usually means lots of AA and/or NA meetings, Celebrate Recovery, cook-outs put on by those organizations, I know we used to have Bible-study sometimes where I work. Change your playmates and playgrounds, one day at a time.
That old cliche gets old, being thrown around so much, but when you think about it, it takes a lot of pressure off a person. One day at a time, meaning, I'm gonna stay sober today, I don't know about tomorrow and I'm not worried about it, but for today, I'm going to do whatever it takes to stay sober. Whether it's calling my sponsor, calling some other person who's sober who cares about me, go to a meeting, go to several meetings, whatever it takes.
That's the great thing about AA/NA meetings. They're always filled with people who care about each other, because the miracle of one alcoholic or addict helping another is so powerful, it can't be beaten if you use it!
That old cliche gets old, being thrown around so much, but when you think about it, it takes a lot of pressure off a person. One day at a time, meaning, I'm gonna stay sober today, I don't know about tomorrow and I'm not worried about it, but for today, I'm going to do whatever it takes to stay sober. Whether it's calling my sponsor, calling some other person who's sober who cares about me, go to a meeting, go to several meetings, whatever it takes.
That's the great thing about AA/NA meetings. They're always filled with people who care about each other, because the miracle of one alcoholic or addict helping another is so powerful, it can't be beaten if you use it!
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epluribus36
Follower of Jesus
Those twelve steps are pretty awesome, in my opinion. They not only help one get sober, and then stay sober, they help one figure out why he or she didn't want to stay sober. Why one found it necessary to numb oneself, and couldn't just deal with life's challenges with dignity.
I wish you and all others peace, and will pray for all who have problems. And let's face it, we all have problems!
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I am back in the right mind again' I am not beating myself up anymore. There some things that I am sad about though, and that is losing my drums in a pawn shop. That is a real killer for me, but I have to go on. God can bless me with another set. But I am ready to do what I have to do to stay sober again, those 5 years that I had clean were the greatest in my adult life' and I want that back and even better.
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ladyjazz
Newbie
All right Spank! I play drums too. Check out Freedom from habitual sin: Overeating, Pornography, Smoking, Drinking
And fasting,fasting and did i say FASTING? Lol
And fasting,fasting and did i say FASTING? Lol
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