Considering Sleeping with this Guy and Not Feeling Guilty About It..

jesus_freak_for_life · Nov 29, 2003

Gosh.. I don't even care anymore.
I've given so much of myself away I might as well go all the way..
I'm starting to hate it all..
I hate the idea of purity before marriage.. monogamy.. the lines of authority in marriage.. I hate it.. I'm falling away from God.. I want nothing to do with Him.. part of me is even starting to hate Him..
even though I don't wanna give this up. *** is wrong with me?

sparrow · Nov 29, 2003

Why don't you care anymore?
I'm sorry that you feel like this. I'm not gonna offer any advice cos I don't think I have anything valuable to say.
All I'd say is, don't sleep with they guy. Even if you don't care about God right now, you will probably regret this later.
My prayers are with you. Hang in there.

Mr.Cheese · Nov 29, 2003

*hug*

May this serve you well:

The only advice my dad ever gave me was "Don't do anything that may get a girl pregnant." I listened.
I did everything except what would get a girl pregnant.
Granted, you can say that he didn't give me much advice, but I'll tell you what he did by saying that: He got me through a lot of life without making some very big mistakes.

So if you absolutely can't help but mess around, I offer to you the same words of wisdom.

jesus_freak_for_life · Nov 29, 2003

im planning on going on the pill.. and using protection at the same time..

Mrs K 2004 · Nov 29, 2003

I don't know that is what Mr. Cheese meant.

I understand your feelings, I've been there! But please, let me tell you, that if you save yourself for that one special person, you will be much happier in the long run!

It's tough sometimes; a lot of the time it's tough! And only you can make these decisions...but don't do anything \without prayer!

(((HUGZ)))

Mr.Cheese · Nov 29, 2003

I refused to have sex because I did not want to accept the responsibility of making a child. All but one pregnancy I know of here occurred while birth control was being used.
When I was growing up that was the line I would not cross. It wasn't cause I was good and morally upstanding. No. I did everything else you could possibly do. But I wanted nothing to do with creating a child because I knew how much of a bad idea that was.
So I will say once again: If you are going to mess around, then don't do anything that could have a remote possibility of leading to pregnancy.
That still leaves you with plenty to keep you occupied.
I'm telling you this to help you out.

Hopeful · Nov 29, 2003

at 15? i am not going to tell you whetehr to sleep with him or not, but if you do, you lose something you will never get back, consider that

jesus_freak_for_life · Nov 29, 2003

bleh... i hate it when people look down on me just because of my age..
i have considered it.. and that's the problem.. i dont care anymore..

msjones21 · Nov 29, 2003

Have you talked to your parents?

jesus_freak_for_life · Nov 29, 2003

no. and i dont plan on it.

my parents and i don't get along.

..and they're not saved and therefore not worth talking to on a subject like this.

i can get the pill confidentially and for free from a clinic my friends taking me to next saturday.. i dont even need an exam to get the prescription.. and like i said.. we're gonna use a condom and other methods to prevent pregnancy..

i really dont see anything wrong with it..

but then again i wanna be my own person right now.. and im starting to really despise conformity. why suppress the urges i naturally have?

msjones21 · Nov 29, 2003

Jesus_Freak, I need to make reference to what you posted on the Youth board since it's relevant to this thread, but I'm over the age limit to post on the teen boards:

Jesus didn't say it was bad.. the only sexual thing Jesus ever mentioned was adultery.. which technically you can't commit until your married or with a married person.

Food for thought.

To me, if concubines were acceptable by God in OT, than it's okay for me to have sex now..

I'm not trying to offend you, but perhaps yuo need to get into your Bible a bit more. You've chosen to justify your sin by using "selective vision" when reading the Scriptures. The Bible is God's Word, regardless of whether or not Jesus, Himself, spoke the words if the Bible says something is wrong, it's wrong. The Bible mentions "fornication" more than 40 times in the Bible. Fornication means the sin of having sex outside of the bonds of legal marriage. It's not jsut sex either. How serious is God about lust and sexual sin? He says that even looking upon someone of the same or opposite sex and having sexual thoughts about them is sin.

And to let you know, God did not honor men taking concubines. David reaped the consequences of this because God told him not to take more than one wife or concubines. It's time yuo get in the Word, look to Godly adults for accountability, and stop twisting the Scriptures to suit your sinful agenda. I know that's harsh but you're on a crash course with disaster.

msjones21 · Nov 29, 2003

no. and i dont plan on it.

my parents and i don't get along.

..and they're not saved and therefore not worth talking to on a subject like this.

I'm terribly sorry for the situation with your parents. Do you attend church? Talk to your pastor's wife or a youth leader. Ask them to pray with you.

i can get the pill confidentially and for free from a clinic my friends taking me to next saturday.. i dont even need an exam to get the prescription.. and like i said.. we're gonna use a condom and other methods to prevent pregnancy..

Obviously you have irresponsible friends. You need to be surrounded with Christlike friends who. instead of cheering you on all the way to the clinic, will show you how your sin can ruin your life and pray with you and help yuo abstain. Not to mention, pregnancy is the least of your worries. Pregnancy is not half as bad as the other drastic consequences you may reap for having pre-marital sex. STD's,. pregnancy, ruining your reputation, falling away from God, not to mention possibly ruining your future relationships with men.

i really dont see anything wrong with it..

Of course you don't because you want your way so badly nothing else matters. It's selfish desires that are causing you to justify this sin in your own mind. As corny as it sounds, would you run to the clinic to get on the pill wiht Jesus by your side? Would you have sex with your boyfriend with Jesus sitting in the room?

but then again i wanna be my own person right now.. and im starting to really despise conformity.

God created you to be like no one else. Whether you're a Christian or not, you can still be your own person. The Bible says Jesus came not only to give us life, but life more abundantly. Remember, the pleasures of the world are fleeting, but the joys of the Lord are eternal. I would be willing to bet money you would regret the decision to have sex within ten minutes after it was over. Why risk it? Why take those chances only to rebel? Is it truly worth it?

why suppress the urges i naturally have?

Because God's Word says to. The Bible says those urges are only to be acted out upon our spouse within marriage. God didn't command this to be mean or make things difficult. He did this because He knows it's the only way to protect us from the pain having sex prematurely causes. I pray for God's intervention right now. Trust me, coming from someone who has been delivered from years of sexual sin, it brings more pain than it's worth.

jesus_freak_for_life · Nov 29, 2003

don't misunderstand me. im not twisting scripture.

i honestly just think that it's a retarded rule.

and right now i dont think too highly of God's plans for marriage. the whole female submission thing has always ticked the **** outta me..

msjones21 · Nov 29, 2003

don't misunderstand me. im not twisting scripture.

I won't argue with you because you're very young, not to mention you have convinced yourself you're not twisting Scripture when in fact you are. You will find out eventually. My prayer is that it won't take drastic consequences to get you to realize.

i honestly just think that it's a retarded rule.

Most young people have trouble with authority. You thinking it's a retarded rule doesn't mean God doesn't command it. God asks for sexual purity among those who are not married, like I said, not to be mean but to protect you. Ask couples who waited until marriage to have sex and then ask people who have lead sexually promiscuous lives. Whose life do you think is the most fulfilling?

and right now i dont think too highly of God's plans for marriage.

Because you're so young you don't see that God's plans for marriage are perfect beyond all measure.

the whole female submission thing has always ticked the **** outta me..

Read more closely. The Bible does not say that women are to submit in the manner I think your are of the opinion it does. Godly submission doesn't mean let your husband mistreat you. Godly submission means stand aside and let hte man be the spiritual leader in the household. Everyone has God-given talents and responsiblities and we are to use these to the fullest to serve Him. One of the best ways is through our marriage. The gender roles are clearly defined not to cause supression, but to provide the ultimate freedom. Husbands are not to abuse their positions within the marriage. It is the man's incredible responsiblity to be the provider and leader of the house. Women shuold be grateful we don't have to carry that burden ourselves. As wives, we are to communicate with our husbands, but leave it to him to make God-lead decisions that are bathed in prayer. Submission isn't about letting a man walk all over you. It's about being the type of women any man could love, honor, and respect.

jesus_freak_for_life · Nov 29, 2003

i dont want anyone else to be the leader but me. that's just how i am. im independent and dont need anyone else telling me what to do..

msjones21 · Nov 29, 2003

i dont want anyone else to be the leader but me. that's just how i am. im independent and dont need anyone else telling me what to do..

I'm independent as well, but I realize that someday I will meet a man who God has chosen to be my husband and he will be my spiritual leader. A husband does not tell you what to do. You have confused Godly submission with having to do what someone wants you to do. Believe me, I felt the same way at 15. Once you grow up you will feel very differently. Just don't rush into making a HUGE mistake. Once you lose your virginity you can never get it back. I spent five years in turmoil and heartache because I didn't like God's warning about the dangers of pre-marital sex. I reaped the consequences. I had a child I gave up for adoption. I have to live with that. I was beaten up during sex with a guy because I let a man sleep with me on the first date. I had a string of men use me then lose me because I didn't like the rules, but also I didn't realize my own worth. God cleansed me of my sin but I can't go back and make myself magically a virgin again. When I was 17 and had sex for the first time (even as a Christian teen) I said "well, the Bible doesn't say it's that bad. Besides, me and this guy really love each other". I felt intense conviction, but I couldn't stop the downward spiral of sin we had started. I have since surrendered it all to God and He can forgive but I have to forgive myself. Just remember, it's easy to abandon God's Word but the fun is only temporary and when it's over you're left with guilt, shame, and pain. The path of righteousness is narrow and rocky, but it promises eternal blessings not only in Heaven, but here on earth.

Stanfi · Nov 29, 2003

Jesus freak,

Your not to have sex out of marriage because God said so. We don't always agree with God's rules. I get angry at Him at times myself. However, if you stop a minute at think about it you will realize that God set up these rules just to protect ourselves. Your young, you have a lot of living ahead of you. Don't ruin it now. Read msjones adivice, she has given you a lot of heartfelt advice, because she is trying to help you.

LovingMother · Nov 29, 2003

I have known a great deal of women who had sex when they were teenagers and not one of them does not regret it. There are support groups just for women who regret that they didn't wait. When you find a man you love, you will both want to submit to each other (yes, the wife is to sumbit to the husband, but the husband is also supposed to submit to the wife). When you find that love, you won't have these angry feelings anymore and that is very much worth waiting for.

msjones21 · Nov 29, 2003

When you find a man you love, you will both want to submit to each other (yes, the wife is to sumbit to the husband, but the husband is also supposed to submit to the wife). When you find that love, you won't have these angry feelings anymore and that is very much worth waiting for.

Amen, beautifully put. The Bible also says after the part about wives submitting themselves to the husband that the husband is to love the wife as Christ loves the Church. What an awesome privilege and responsiblity!

Warrior Poet · Nov 29, 2003

jesus_freak_for_life said:
i can get the pill confidentially and for free from a clinic my friends taking me to next saturday.. i dont even need an exam to get the prescription.. and like i said.. we're gonna use a condom and other methods to prevent pregnancy.

Click to expand...

The pill is very easy to obtain these days and is given free out to those wise enough to use it...this is the only thing in this thread that makes sense that you have said. I got my wife pregnant twice while she was on the pill once during the use of condems as well....nothing is sure fire, if you can handle being a 16 year old mother...well that is on you, cause it can happen.

i really dont see anything wrong with it..

Click to expand...

And you wont while you continue to ignore the what the other side is saying, even non-biblically or non-christian thinking, 15 is to young to have sex, and there is no reason you should be with a guy that will allow to do so.

but then again i wanna be my own person right now.. and im starting to really despise conformity. why suppress the urges i naturally have?

Click to expand...

Good for you sweetie be your own person do what you need to do, but having sex isnt allowing you to be that person....
You dispise conformty but you are falling into it, you think that being a virgin is the norm or in thing now a days, you are DEAD WRONG havng sex at 15 is the norm. You want to be a rebel and kick conformity in the face, then dont have sex, cause as soon as you do..... you've conformed.

When I used to get real mad i would let go, the natural urges in me used to be to fight and not stop till he wasnt moving or knocked out cold, to many times that happened, I have and had to surpress them it was the RIGHT thing to do and I was far from being a christian or caring what gods input was. Wether you see it as something you can just repent and be frogiven for later down the road, bad frame of mind though it will be granted, you need to understand there are real world consequences to actions such as these.....and who is this guy, and why are you with him?

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