confusion upon confusion

[feelinhopeless]

I don't know much about the forums...all I know is I need to express how I feel because I'm tired of holding it in! I feel like i'm going to explode. I have struggled with sexual thoughts for about 6 years of my life. I had an encounter with a guy*he wasn't a b/f* but he and I and two other of my friends one being another guy and one being a girl. we went out before I knew it the guy was holding my hand and just huggy, touchy at the start of the I guess you would call date. we messed around and did everything but actually have sex...that's when i guess things started for me. That's what sparked me to "explore" pornography. Throughout the years i've just had mental images and thoughts that feel so uncontolable...i feel like i can't handle it. this caused me to become involved in a relationship with my friend* who is girl*...i now don't even speak to her...i also had another relationship with a friend who was also a girl..but that ended also.
this scares me i know it's wrong i'm just confused...aggervated..stressed...i feel i have no one i can turn to because if i tell any of my friends...who are great christian people...i just feel that they'll think differently of me. i keep most people at a distance because of fear of making the wrong move or losing people who mean the most to me. i'm scared and i just want help...i just don't know what to do. maybe i've come to the wrong place to express.

 

[VivDaGurl]

Hi there,

I don't think you've come to the wrong place, my dear... Please do not feel stressed up about this issue. You've come to know and realised what you've done that is not right and you've come to seek for .

God has given us sexuality as I believed you could find out more in the Bible and also within the forum. When a person is being exposed to sexuality for the first time, we are so into it because it's so nice and it brings out ourself as well as making us feeling great.

However, we, shouldn't be putting ourself into this unless we are doing it with the correct people and this is not easy. Once the sexuality part of ours had been stirred up, it's very difficult for us to throw this area of us away and we would go about to look for some where to satisfy ourself such as masturbation, cyber sex, phone sex or whatsoever materials that could satisfy us.

The Lord had created sexuality in order to bring two persons as one. We should understand that when we have sex, we are being bonded with another person and we have to break this bond. First of all, are you a Christian? Confess your sins that you had induldge into sexuality when you are not supposed to and also your involvement in phonorgraphy and the girls. Then, submit yourself to the Lord.

Our mind is very vulnerable and we can absorb things easily like a sponge and sometimes, we can't really control what our mind works. Having images coming by across your mind isn't a sin at all but entertaining your thoughts is a sin, meaning, when your mind travels back time showing you that you are having sex with certain guys and it's so clear, you got aroused and began to touch yourself, that is sin. You need to get up and start to get something to do like reading the Bible, gardening, pick up some sports to play, etc.

I'll be praying for you...

 

[johnfiredup]

Hi firstly i want to welcome you . yes you are in the right place, there are so many caring folk here who will listen and offer help. from what you have said , you sound so upset, it's so good that you have taken the first step.. it must have taken a great deal of courage to post, me? well i'm 53 and married .you never said if you ever had anything to do with christianity But ,honey Jesus really is the answer.. is there a church you could go to.. you might fing the Pastoral staff more understanding than you think( I would only suggest you choose a female counsellor)
I guess , to finish, that I'm really not able to offer much more, but I am sure there are some wonderful people who will respond and you will make friends with here.
I'll say a prayer for you God Bless you John
l

 

[livin4thebigman]

feelinghopeless. I was the same place you were. For myself, it started when I was abused when I was twelve. That guy got me started into pornography and masturbation. From that point on, I spend the next 6-7 years of my life addicted to porn & masturbation which ultimately led to messing around with several girls.

I can tell you that there is hope! However, sexual struggle is one of the hardest to overcome and also one of the most destructive. In order to overcome this, you need to be willing to give it up and move on. I told myself numerous times that I wanted to quit, but in actuality, I didn't. Having someone to be accountable to is imperative. Now if you decide to do that, you need to be completely honest with them so that they know what is going on and how to help you.

Also, more importantly, you need to be humble before the Lord, realize the severity of your sin, and accept the grace the Lord is giving you. He is faithful and will forgive you.

Realize that you will be tempted to commit these types of sins again, however take a look at I Cor 10:13. In all tempting situations, there is a way out, we just need to choose to take it. It is usually the harder way and is not comfortable (because our nature is to sin, therefore we need to go against our nature) however, it is necessary.

If you would like some help, I would love to help you out. Either post on here or PM me.

I'm praying for you.

PS. Have people praying for you also, this is imperative.