confused

[jamie83]

Hi,

I've been a christian for about three years and my husband for about 2, after we both got saved we were attending church every sunday and sometimes on wednesday's when my husband had off work, I was also reading my bible almost every night. but for the last year we stopped going to church, and i can't even remember the last time i read my bible it seems like everytime sunday morning rolls around i always find an excuse not to go and my husband who loves his sleep always goes right along with whatever i decide.
I know i have depression and thats part of it, ive tried taking medication which did nothing but make me sleep all the time, ive prayed or at least tried praying as much as i know how to God over this and nothing, i feel really hopeless over this, im wondering if im even a christian at all or if God really even hears me. ugh i feel horrible and miserable over this, i hate how much ive fallen away from God and i feel so unworthy of speaking to him at all.
Anyone have any advise for me? has anyone else gone through something like this?

thanks

 

[freeport]

Hi,

I've been a christian for about three years and my husband for about 2, after we both got saved we were attending church every sunday and sometimes on wednesday's when my husband had off work, I was also reading my bible almost every night. but for the last year we stopped going to church, and i can't even remember the last time i read my bible it seems like everytime sunday morning rolls around i always find an excuse not to go and my husband who loves his sleep always goes right along with whatever i decide.
I know i have depression and thats part of it, ive tried taking medication which did nothing but make me sleep all the time, ive prayed or at least tried praying as much as i know how to God over this and nothing, i feel really hopeless over this, im wondering if im even a christian at all or if God really even hears me. ugh i feel horrible and miserable over this, i hate how much ive fallen away from God and i feel so unworthy of speaking to him at all.
Anyone have any advise for me? has anyone else gone through something like this?

thanks

Church does not save, God saves. What is important is to keep the words of Jesus in your heart, if you keep the word in your heart and apply it, you will remain in Him.

You need to study the New Testament and believe what you read while reading it as though Jesus and the Apostles are talking to you personally.

And that is salvation, believing in the testimony. Christians are asked 'do not forsake the fellowship', but that is not a commandment, it is just is good to have Christian support around you -- especially when starting out.

Keep your eyes always on God. For all your worries and all your problems, put them to God and trust in God. Jesus teaches you about this, keep those words and put them in practice -- in your heart. Watch yourself from condemning, forgive anyone you have anything against. See God right there just like you were there as one of the sick and get to that point where you can say to God, "God I know you can heal me, please do", and He most surely will.

Pray in your heart at all times, and do not worry about being condemned or judged, but believe the message of salvation which tells you that if you do believe, you are saved.

You can live in a cave and learn everything you need to know, as the Apostle John recorded from Jesus in his record of the Good News, 'the truth will teach you all things', and his his first letter, 'you do not need teachers, the anointing teaches you all things, and it is real, not counterfeit -- even as it has shown you'.

Then, look around for a church that has a later service and is more relaxed in dress and such, so you will feel comfortable fellowshipping.

You guys need the guidance and encouragement from a good church. Not for salvation, but to help you build up your faith, and so you can help them build up their faith.


Peace.

 

[Bouke285]

Freeport has good words, also try and remember your salvation is not based on emotions, but on a promise. I have had my doubts and this verse has greatly helped me. Just because you have doubt does not mean you are not a Christian. It's all based on the promise of God and the love he has for us.

Titus 1:2 in hope of eternal life which God, who cannot lie, promised before time began.

He is always eagerly awaiting a closer relationship with every one of his children. You said you have been slowly falling away in your relationship with him. To me it seems like he may be using this to draw you back to him try to look at it in the light it may meant to be presented in.

 

[jamie83]

wow thanks a lot, ive heard stressed so much by christians about how you HAVE to go to church every sunday and be in a fellowship with other christians, this really cleared up a lot of things for me. I definitely have a lot of growing to do, i really don't know much about God, as for the church i attend when i do go there, its a baptist chuch, its very conservative and modest the women all wear skirts and dresses and the men all wear suits, it does make me feel uncomfortable at times like im being judged when i go there or that i don't fit in.

 

[Bouke285]

wow thanks a lot, ive heard stressed so much by christians about how you HAVE to go to church every sunday and be in a fellowship with other christians, this really cleared up a lot of things for me. I definitely have a lot of growing to do, i really don't know much about God, as for the church i attend when i do go there, its a baptist chuch, its very conservative and modest the women all wear skirts and dresses and the men all wear suits, it does make me feel uncomfortable at times like im being judged when i go there or that i don't fit in.

Yes it is especially hard when you feel like you don't fit in at your church. I have grown to understand that a physical building is not required, especially when God is always with you. Why not take your church with you everywhere you go? Yes being in a room with fellow believers is amazing and a great experience, but I have to admit I tried the baptist church. 0.0 it was hard for me to stay awake, no offense I have nothing against baptists, but finding a great church where the Holy Spirit is ALIVE and KICKING =p is an awesome experience. A church like this will greatly help in your growth with the Father, it all depends on where you fit in don't let anyone push you around. (except God of course =D)

*Edit* And I highly suggest you check out the documentary a few threads below this one, not the one by me but the one that is titled A powerful documentary. It was a very humbling, touching, and faithfull experience.

 

[jamie83]

Yes it is especially hard when you feel like you don't fit in at your church. I have grown to understand that a physical building is not required, especially when God is always with you. Why not take your church with you everywhere you go? Yes being in a room with fellow believers is amazing and a great experience, but I have to admit I tried the baptist church. 0.0 it was hard for me to stay awake, no offense I have nothing against baptists, but finding a great church where the Holy Spirit is ALIVE and KICKING =p is an awesome experience. A church like this will greatly help in your growth with the Father, it all depends on where you fit in don't let anyone push you around. (except God of course =D)

Yes i completely agree about it being hard to stay awake at a baptist church, i would love to attend a church that was more "Alive and Kicking" unfortunatly i don't think there's anything like that where i live

 

[freeport]

Yes i completely agree about it being hard to stay awake at a baptist church, i would love to attend a church that was more "Alive and Kicking" unfortunatly i don't think there's anything like that where i live

I have met good Christians from all sorts of churches. Have not yet seen a brick and mortar church that has perfect doctrine. Good Christians are good despite wrong doctrine.

I have met good Christians at churches that are not contaminated by false doctrine, and good Christians that compromise too much, to my taste.

A few pointers on churches:

1. Legalism [being a Pharisee, basically] is very dangerous. This is much harder to do with the message of Truth and Grace then it was with the message of Law and Condemnation.

But they do it, they do it a lot.

The rules may be written done and official or they may be implicit. The main indicator is how these churches view other churches. Do they view their little group or their collection of groups as alone saved? Do they look upon other Christians with mercy? Or with condemnation? Because legalism is the business of condemnation.

What they do is create a bunch of unnecessary rules, 'do this' and 'do not do that' to live by, instead of by faith. And they then claim they are approved because they follow these rules. Which are not in Scripture and make no sense.

We know good and evil, do not let anyone claim you do not know.

When someone does this they are claiming that faith in the finished work of God through Jesus Christ crucified is not enough. That is the work to trust in for righteousness. It is enough. The accuser of the brethren - Satan - is the one who says that is not enough.

But he has no accusations against Christians because Jesus destroyed all accusations at the cross.

And every Christian is sanctified by Jesus through His flesh, His Spirit, His Death and His Resurrection.

The Law, therefore, has no accusations against any Christians. One may only be accused according to the word of Christ, whether one believes or not and is sanctified by the Spirit, or not.

2. Look for Christians at a church to come up to you and your husband and welcome you as you are. For who you are. No strings attached.

Churches into legalism, which denies the cross of Jesus, expect you to jump through hoops for their approval. That worked with the Pharisees in 1 AD. This is 2009.

That is a big indicator right off.

Those same hoops are the very things which keep people from God.



Really, that is enough to go on. Some churches are too far in the "other direction" and accept hedonistic practices in the world. Look out for that, too. But, that should be more rare.

They will also level false accusations - not true - false ones, against other Christians.


Personally, I am open minded on denominations, otherwise. Some churches in some denominations are good, while others are bad. Some denominations tend to have more errors then others.


I generally prefer Charismatic, but there are flaws in those, as well.


You do not have to fellowship at a church. The Free World is majority Christian. There are many Christian groups online. This forum is a Christian group.

I am sure there are many gatherings of Christians in the more modern social media, as well.


Most important thing is to get grounded in Scripture, first, however. You, the Bible, and God.

Then you will be better armed to make decisions about where and with whom to fellowship.

 

[SharonL]

Jamie you have some really wise words throughout this thread - really from the heart.

Don't condemn yourself - God knows your heart - and I have to agree about the churches - some are so dead in the Spirit that in my minds eye I see the angels pulling Jesus through the door saying come on - we have to get a little Spirit here.

Bloom where you are planted - when we moved 4 years ago I have not found a church - we've tried Methodis, Baptist, Catholic, Lutheran - all dead in the Spirit and I come home and cry.

My husband was Catholic and me non-denominational - we have now thrown down ALL religion and just have a beautiful walk with Jesus, led by the Holy Spirit - God knows our hearts.

We now have 2 programs that really lift us us that we watch on Sunday, then we have our Bible study - my husband reads several Chapters and we discuss and what we don't understand, we look up - we pray, read, talk and have a wonderful worship for about 2-1/2 hours on Sunday morning.

It has drawn us closer to the Lord and we can now discuss things because I am not one denomination and my husband another - we are just children of the Lord.

You say you are pulling away - you are judging yourself because you feel you are not putting anything into the relationship so you will not get anything out of it - just remember when we feel that way - we are the ones that have moved - Jesus is still standing firm with outstreatched arms saying here I am let me hug you.

If your husband goes along with you - see if he will do this with you - you don't have to be in a church - YOU ARE THE CHURCH - it will draw you closer to each other and to God.

 

[LogosRhema]

Act. Clearly you have admitted to a change and recognize what you are missing. Return to regular time studying and praying and as well return to a fellowship! Start there and I do believe a wondrous change you will see.

 

[jamie83]

thank you everyone for all of your replys, a lot of things were said that really helped me rethink some things, me and my husband are relatively new christians so were still growing and learning, there is just so much out there about what a christian should be and act like, its overwhelming and confusing.

 

[LogosRhema]

thank you everyone for all of your replys, a lot of things were said that really helped me rethink some things, me and my husband are relatively new christians so were still growing and learning, there is just so much out there about what a christian should be and act like, its overwhelming and confusing.

Dig into the word! Is my best advice, say clear of books that give THEIR opinion of scripture. Read it for yourself. Start with Romans, Ephesians, Corinthians, Philippians! And as always the Gospels are very key to know as well. I'd also suggest joining a discipleship group or a Bible study group! Welcome to the family! If you have any questions regarding any scripture, subject, etc within Christianity... Feel free to PM me... More than happily answer any of your questions. And don't let my young age deter you!