Church dress code.

[Daniels]

Church Dress Code Still an Issue for Many
As evidenced in a recent Dear Abby column, it is obvious that what we wear to church is still a big issue for many people. Just look at the responses Dear Abby received. A personal note: it would appear that the people who have an issue with what people wear to church are... um... well, churched people.

http://mondaymorninginsight.com/ind...issue_for_many/

 

[MikeMcK]

I'm really bugged by some of the things I'm seeing as far as clothing goes.

I know that this is the 90's and we're just supposed to accept everybody and everything, no matter how inappropriate or Unbiblical it may be, but the truth is, the way we dress for church makes a statement about how seriously we take going to God's house.

I'm currently the plantiff in a law suit. I wear a suit to court. the defendant wears baggy jeans and a dirty t-shirt.

I've had several attorney friends remark to me that it is a huge tactical blunder for his attorney to allow him to dress like that because it sends the message that I have more respect for the proceedings and the dignity of the court and that gives me more credibility in the eyes of the judge.

For the record, my suit isn't expensive at all. It's an off the rack bargain model from Men's Warehouse.

Of course, the argument will be made, "but what about people who can't afford nice clothes". Well, first of all, isn't it funny that the people who ask this question are never among the people who can't afford nice clothes?

We're not talking about wearing expensive designer things, it's a matter of wearing something as appropriate to the occasion as you can.

We aren't necessarily talking about someone who can't wear appropriate clothes, but someone who won't wear appropriate clothes.

I do not understand what leads girls and ladies to dress immodestly. I don't understand what makes men dress as though they've just come inside from mowing the grass.

 

[seebs]

I don't own a suit.

FWIW, I do a lot of lawsuiting; it's a hobby. I show up in jeans and a button shirt. My opponents show up in suits.

I win.

I don't much like the notion that we should not only show respect of persons, but rely on it for personal advantage.

In the end, "appropriate" is a worldly thing, and I don't recall being instructed to live that way.

 

[MikeMcK]

I don't own a suit.

FWIW, I do a lot of lawsuiting; it's a hobby. I show up in jeans and a button shirt. My opponents show up in suits.

I win.

I don't much like the notion that we should not only show respect of persons, but rely on it for personal advantage.

In the end, "appropriate" is a worldly thing, and I don't recall being instructed to live that way.

You completely missed the point.

Appropriate isn't worldly. We are called to show respect to God. Our dress shows our attitude toward God.

 

[sparklecat]

We are called to show respect to God. Our dress shows our attitude toward God.

Personally, when I went to church, I dressed to be comfortable, rather than worrying about whether the rest of the church was going to disapprove of my jeans when the women were wearing skirts. I figured that God knew I respected him, was going there to focus on him, and saw the clothing as a non-issue. I would have seen changing the type of clothing I wore as an attempt to look good to the other people there, rather than stemming from any feeling that it was the right thing to do. That motivation would have, in my opinion, made it the wrong thing to do for me.

 

[MikeMcK]

I figured that God knew I respected him,

How could God know that you respected Him when you did not show respect for Him?

If you respect God, then that respect is going to show.

 

[sparklecat]

How could God know that you respected Him when you did not show respect for Him?

If you respect God, then that respect is going to show.

You know, I'm just going to abandon this conversation here, I think. I really don't see that we're going to be able to agree on it being possible to show respect without your specific ways of doing so, and I'm not really up to debating it.

 

[MikeMcK]

You know, I'm just going to abandon this conversation here, I think. I really don't see that we're going to be able to agree on it being possible to show respect without your specific ways of doing so, and I'm not really up to debating it.

I think that part of the problem is that you're only 21 years old. You grew up in a generation that didn't learn manners and how to behave. I don't hold that part of it against you, but I don't think that there's ever an excuse to go into a church without some sense of decorum.

 

[Arnold_Philips]

You completely missed the point.

Appropriate isn't worldly. We are called to show respect to God. Our dress shows our attitude toward God.

Isn't one of the biggest points evangelicals like to harp on that your faith is a personal relationship with Jesus? It that's true, then why should someone else's personal relationship be identical to yours?

 

[TheMissus]

One thing that I hated about church when I was a kid was the uncomfortable clothing and shoes I had to wear. I couldn't wait to leave church so I could get into my "real" clothes.

Perhaps the more lenient dress codes help with the physical discomfort of attending church in the "Sunday best." If they're dressed comfortably, they don't have that negative association with church and physical discomfort.

And hey, Jesus wore sandals.

 

[sparklecat]

I think that part of the problem is that you're only 21 years old. You grew up in a generation that didn't learn manners and how to behave. I don't hold that part of it against you, but I don't think that there's ever an excuse to go into a church without some sense of decorum.

Your generalization is wrong in this case.

 

[katautumn]

How could God know that you respected Him when you did not show respect for Him?

If you respect God, then that respect is going to show.

How did you deduce that she didn't show respect for God? Because she wore blue jeans to church? So what? I doubt the Lord is really concerned whether a guy wears sneakers or wing-tipped dress shoes to Sunday morning service. You're right, alot of people wouldn't wear blue jeans and t-shirts to work. What does that have to do with church? Don't follow the dress code at work you get fired. I doubt not following a non-written church "dress code" would get you automatic exclusion from the Kingdom of Heaven. At the very worst you may be asked to leave the church. I doubt there is any shortage of churches, at least not in my area.

In my opinion, "church clothes" are a waste of money. If you're a woman who works at a greenhouse for a living, your wardrobe most likely consists of comfortable, all-weather clothes that can get dirty, not jumpers and dresses and suits. It would be expensive to go out and buy an entirely separate wardrobe of clothing just to wear for, at best, two hours a week.

Church "dress codes" are less about reverance and more about keeping up with the Joneses. It's less about respecting God and more about projecting a good image to prospective members. While I see nothing wrong with expecting members to adhere to a certain code of modesty, I find that preachers and church members who whine about people who wear jeans and sneakers to church are the same ones who treat church like it's supposed to be some elite social club.

 

[TheMissus]

I think that part of the problem is that you're only 21 years old. You grew up in a generation that didn't learn manners and how to behave. I don't hold that part of it against you, but I don't think that there's ever an excuse to go into a church without some sense of decorum.

And the same has been said about your generation by previous generations. It's irrelevant.

 

[Arnold_Philips]

How could God know that you respected Him when you did not show respect for Him?

This is pretty mindboggling. There's something god doesn't know?

 

[Arnold_Philips]

I think that part of the problem is that you're only 21 years old. You grew up in a generation that didn't learn manners and how to behave. I don't hold that part of it against you, but I don't think that there's ever an excuse to go into a church without some sense of decorum.

And you're part of a different generation that didn't learn the manners of the preceding. Why so judgmental about clothes?

 

[MikeMcK]

And you're part of a different generation that didn't learn the manners of the preceding.

Actually, we did.

 

[katautumn]

Actually, we did.

That's funny, because my husband is actually older than you are and his generation was also lazy and always stoned and listened to heavy metal music. My husband stayed drunk and stoned from the time he was sixteen until he was about thirty years old. So, please tell me, what exactly about your generation really sets you apart, considering the fact that when you were twenty-one people in their forties and fifties called your generation lazy and disrespectful.

And what does this have to do with church dress codes again? I see you completely failed to address any of my points.

 

[Arnold_Philips]

Actually, we did.

If your age is correct, you're GenX. You as a generation didn't.

 

[Polycarp1]

I think that part of the problem is that you're only 21 years old. You grew up in a generation that didn't learn manners and how to behave. I don't hold that part of it against you, but I don't think that there's ever an excuse to go into a church without some sense of decorum.

Mike, I am sorry but your own words indict you. That is a judgment of Sparklecat's interior motivation of respect for God based on her clothing, which God sees past but persons in the congregation are wont to judge her by. Are you showing any respect for her in chastizing her in public as you did? And then patronizing her with "I don't hold that part of it against you..."? I was taught that one could discuss, even argue in the proper circumstances (as here) while showing proper courtesy to another.

As a Marine, you wore your uniform proudly as a sign of respect for the Corps, but it was the demeanor with which you conducted yourself, the interior commitment to duty and honor, that was the core to the respect you showed; the uniform was merely its outward form. Am I not correct?

And a young woman IMO should be treated with the respect due her as a person, not talked down to like a child. That too is a matter of proper courtesy. Message boards and their anonymity provide a great deal of scope for discourteous behavior, so I believe it is incumbent on us to act with proper courtesy and respect. And I trust that you will read this as a polite disagreement with your position, with the proper courtesy that I have attempted to show while critiquing your comments, not as an insult to your own standards, which is neither intended nor, I hope, taken by you as such.

 

[MikeMcK]

Are you showing any respect for her in chastizing her in public as you did?

She is the one who brought it up in public.

And then patronizing her with "I don't hold that part of it against you..."?

It isn't patronizing to not hold someone responsible for something they have no control over.

As a Marine, you wore your uniform proudly as a sign of respect for the Corps, but it was the demeanor with which you conducted yourself, the interior commitment to duty and honor, that was the core to the respect you showed; the uniform was merely its outward form. Am I not correct?

If that is true, then why are the clothes we wear to church not also indicative of these things?

And a young woman IMO should be treated with the respect due her as a person, not talked down to like a child.

I'm sorry that you feel that this is what I did. I am confident that I did not.

And I trust that you will read this as a polite disagreement with your position, with the proper courtesy that I have attempted to show while critiquing your comments, not as an insult to your own standards, which is neither intended nor, I hope, taken by you as such.

I don't take it as an insult, but it is awfully misguided.