Christian Marriage

[mkgal1]

True confession produces true desire.

I would even add to that that...

"true desire directs our behavior."

 

[Created2Write]

Not so sure I agree with the flows naturally part. It takes consious effort to express love and to show respect. It also sometimes takes effort to receive them. That's where I think a lot of marriages go sideways. The participants expect that love and respect and all manner of other things just happen naturally but the reality is that not only do we have to be intentional about expressing them, we have to be intentional about looking for our spouse expressing them, even if it's not necessarily in the way that we receive them.

I agree. If love and submission flowed "naturally" there wouldn't have been any need for them to be mentioned in the Bible, imo.

 

[chaz345]

True confession produces true desire.

Confession is a longing to follow God's way in the light of our constant failures.
It has a definite element of despair in it as well. like in "there is no way I can do it on my own".

PS 51:6 Surely you desire truth in the inner parts;
you teach me wisdom in the inmost place.
PS 51:7 Cleanse me with hyssop, and I will be clean;
wash me, and I will be whiter than snow.

God's cleansing process follows one's inner and often desperate confession the s/he simply cannot change on his own.

Marriage is a lifetime process in this place we call "world".

You go through this, learn about each other, yet mostly learn about oneself.

I always respected folks who were married a long time despite of their problems, arguments, idiosyncrasies (abusive marriages being the exception, of course).

They deserve medals for this - and they probably would - in Heaven.

Thanks,
In Christ,
Ed

All I'm saying is that even with the true desire, it's still not necessarily something that "happens naturally". No matter how much desire and how true that desire is, it's still work to express and receive love and respect.

 

[Created2Write]

All I'm saying is that even with the true desire, it's still not necessarily something that "happens naturally". No matter how much desire and how true that desire is, it's still work to express and receive love and respect.

I agree.

 

[mkgal1]

I'm still not seeing any mention of our ability.....only that truly "knowing God" produces a life like Christ's.

3 Now by this we know that we know Him, if we keep His commandments. 4 He who says, “I know Him,” and does not keep His commandments, is a liar, and the truth is not in him. 5 But whoever keeps His word, truly the love of God is perfected in him. By this we know that we are in Him. 6 He who says he abides in Him ought himself also to walk just as He walked.
7 Brethren,[a] I write no new commandment to you, but an old commandment which you have had from the beginning. The old commandment is the word which you heard from the beginning.[b] 8 Again, a new commandment I write to you, which thing is true in Him and in you, because the darkness is passing away, and the true light is already shining.
9 He who says he is in the light, and hates his brother, is in darkness until now. 10 He who loves his brother abides in the light, and there is no cause for stumbling in him. 11 But he who hates his brother is in darkness and walks in darkness, and does not know where he is going, because the darkness has blinded his eyes.

 

[chaz345]

I'm still not seeing any mention of our ability.....only that truly "knowing God" produces a life like Christ's.

Ok let's try this.

If one truly knows God, then a life like Christ's just happens naturally with no work on our part. Is that what you are saying?

 

[mkgal1]

Ok let's try this.

If one truly knows God, then a life like Christ's just happens naturally with no work on our part. Is that what you are saying?

I don't know what you mean by "work". Where do you see our efforts mentioned in that passage? It says that if we keep His word, His love is perfected in us, and that by this (His love being perfected in us)...we KNOW that we are "in Him". I see that as God's work.....not ours. We just do the seeking and surrendering. If you are calling THAT "work"....well, then I agree. We do play a part. I don't believe we are dragged through life.

 

[Edial]

I agree. If love and submission flowed "naturally" there wouldn't have been any need for them to be mentioned in the Bible, imo.

That is true.
However, the true attitude of submission and love and respect is never in one's efforts.
It comes from within and that fuels our efforts

Why then the Bible tells us to submit, respect, love enemies, etc, etc ... ?
Basically to show that none of it will work (or last) without God changing us first.

Submit, love, respect, love enemies gives us a direction to following God.
Direction to look at as a road-sign to freedom.

Effort? Yes.
Effort as following God "because we can?" Will not last.
Effort as following God "because we can't on our own?".
Then The Shepherd will pick us up and lead us.

That's how it works in a Supernatural realm we call Marriage.

Thanks,
In Christ,
Ed

 

[Created2Write]

That is true.
However, the true attitude of submission and love and respect is never in one's efforts.
It comes from within and that fuels our efforts

Why then the Bible tells us to submit, respect, love enemies, etc, etc ... ?
Basically to show that none of it will work (or last) without God changing us first.

Submit, love, respect, love enemies gives us a direction to following God.
Direction to look at as a road-sign to freedom.

Effort? Yes.
Effort as following God "because we can?" Will not last.
Effort as following God "because we can't on our own?".
Then The Shepherd will pick us up and lead us.

That's how it works in a Supernatural realm we call Marriage.

Thanks,
In Christ,
Ed

I agree. It's not just our efforts, because our efforts can only take us so far. We absolutely must have God's help. And our hearts do need to be in the right place. I definitely agree there too. I was only saying that none of that is "natural". Our sinful nature is what is natural. Denying that and living as Christ wants us to is not. It requires a lot of discipline and self-sacrifice. But the good thing about our God is that He is never unwilling to help us. All we have to do is ask Him and He will guide us. But we still must do our best to live up to His Word.

 

[FaithPrevails]

That is true.
However, the true attitude of submission and love and respect is never in one's efforts.
It comes from within and that fuels our efforts

Why then the Bible tells us to submit, respect, love enemies, etc, etc ... ?
Basically to show that none of it will work (or last) without God changing us first.

Submit, love, respect, love enemies gives us a direction to following God.
Direction to look at as a road-sign to freedom.

Effort? Yes.
Effort as following God "because we can?" Will not last.
Effort as following God "because we can't on our own?".
Then The Shepherd will pick us up and lead us.

That's how it works in a Supernatural realm we call Marriage.

Thanks,
In Christ,
Ed

Great post - especially the bolded part.

 

[mkgal1]

Effort? Yes.
Effort as following God "because we can?" Will not last.
Effort as following God "because we can't on our own?".
Then The Shepherd will pick us up and lead us.

That's how it works in a Supernatural realm we call Marriage.

Thanks,
In Christ,
Ed

It such a great point that our efforts eventually fizzle out. Another thing as well, that I feel is equally important, is that we cannot substitute our understanding for God's wisdom.

If this is off topic, I would be happy to begin another thread. I just like that Ed can post in this thread, as well as Jane....to me, this all applies.

In Galatians 5 verse 7, the Bible says (through Paul) "You ran well. Who hindered you from obeying the truth? This persuasian doesn't come from Him who calls you." So, I see the divide as following God....or following those deceptions. Getting off to "a great start" isn't enough.......we have to continue to strive for the truth.

 

[Edial]

It such a great point that our efforts eventually fizzle out. Another thing as well, that I feel is equally important, is that we cannot substitute our understanding for God's wisdom.

If this is off topic, I would be happy to begin another thread. I just like that Ed can post in this thread, as well as Jane....to me, this all applies.

In Galatians 5 verse 7, the Bible says (through Paul) "You ran well. Who hindered you from obeying the truth? This persuasian doesn't come from Him who calls you." So, I see the divide as following God....or following those deceptions. Getting off to "a great start" isn't enough.......we have to continue to strive for the truth.

Sure. Sounds like a great idea for a thread.