chores for older kids

[faith177]

Do your older kids help out around the house. I am having the hardest time getting my son to do anything around the house. He is going to college right now which Im really glad for, so I want to help him out by letting him stay here. However watching him play video games in all his spare time and not doing a single chore is driving me crazy.

 

[Spock49]

I would explain to him that he is a part of the house and if he lived out on his own he would have certain tasks to do on a daily basis as a responsible adult. Such as making his bed, doing his own laundry, rinsing and putting dishes he has used in the dishwasher and cleaning his bathroom. Let him know that you have an expectation that these things be done before recreation.

 

[JaneFW]

Yeah what 1Sam said. We don't load our college kid with chores, but he has to vacuum upstairs and down and clean the boys' bathroom, a chore which he shares with his brothers. He has taken care of his own laundry since he was 13, so that's not an issue. He can be called upon also to help with other things that need "a big , strong guy" and he likes that acknowledgement that he is a young man now, and not a child.

 

[If Not For Grace]

Do your older kids help

Anybody who lives in MY house "helps" from younger children to in-laws...

(It's ALSO a good way to get rid of unwelcomed or visitors who oeverstay their welcome "oh so glad you stopped by, can you give me a hand with _____?)

If a man w/not work neither let him eat - was the 1st scripture any of mine were taught.

It's not an option-I'm have a vocational services background-I have gotten diabetic double amputees jobs, so their is no excuse acceptable to me--IF you want changes make changes--No one should be accepted in college till they do their OWN laundry (I think that should be a law)

 

[k450ofu3k-gh-5ipe]

Anybody who lives in MY house "helps" from younger children to in-laws...

(It's ALSO a good way to get rid of unwelcomed or visitors who oeverstay their welcome "oh so glad you stopped by, can you give me a hand with _____?)

If a man w/not work neither let him eat - was the 1st scripture any of mine were taught.

It's not an option-I'm have a vocational services background-I have gotten diabetic double amputees jobs, so their is no excuse acceptable to me--IF you want changes make changes--No one should be accepted in college till they do their OWN laundry (I think that should be a law)

Good post

 

[bliz5]

An adult who lives in a home needs to takke care of his own stuff, and contribute to the general good. Obviously he should do his own laundry and take care of his living space. He should also be assigned some regular tasks and be expected to help out with special projects, putting in the garden, painting s room etc.

Write up the new rules that go with free room and board. Present them to him. Make any modifications as necessary. Apologize to him for not having spelled out your expectations clearly before this.

 

[faith177]

I tell him everyday that he should be helping out because he lives here rent free. He answers that he is going to school so that should be enough. He just ignores me when I say he has to help out, he always has some exuses or just says stop talking to me. I have threatened to kick him out, he turns it around and starts fights saying that I want to kick him out. Or says he wont go. He will only help if I pay him or get him something. If I actually kick him out he has nowhere to go and will prob drop out of school. He plays video games in the living room every night until late in the night. I cant even get him to stop doing that. I am at a loss.

 

[homeofmew]

Make sure you have gender and age specific jobs, like don't have your 13 yr old daughter mow the lawn, have them do like laundry or the dishes.

Also do not just make your daughter do everything, my parents to that to me while my brother has no chores, and if i forget to throw napkin away he yells at me. So make sure if you have multiple children especially of different genders you give them both work.

 

[bliz5]

Make sure you have gender and age specific jobs, like don't have your 13 yr old daughter mow the lawn, have them do like laundry or the dishes.

Also do not just make your daughter do everything, my parents to that to me while my brother has no chores, and if i forget to throw napkin away he yells at me. So make sure if you have multiple children especially of different genders you give them both work.

Are female children unable to mow lawns? Do boys not need to wash dishes?

 

[illudium_phosdex]

When my adult step-daughter lived with us, she was pretty much responsible for her room as well as helping out in communal areas (living room, kitchen, dining room and main bathroom). She was in college and I didn't want to load her down too much since I knew she needed study time so she didn't have specific chores but she would daily help me out to get the house strait. I'd just tell her, "Hey, could you do this while I do that?" and that's usually all it took. I didn't mind doing her laundry. I'd just add it to ours but 99% of the time, she did her own anyway. She also didn't mind mowing grass and doing yard work with her dad on weekends. Oh and, she would also make a meal occasionally when she knew I was super busy with work. I really missed her help (and still do) when she moved out.

 

[homeofmew]

Are female children unable to mow lawns? Do boys not need to wash dishes?

Well it depends I couldn't push the lawnmower when I was younger.
Also where I live there are fire ants which if bitten I get allergic reactions, I avoid tall grass and fields here in Houston like no tomorrow. So it depends.

Guys can do the dishes and Girls can mow lawns. Just make sure they are psychically capable of doing it.

 

[rainy]

Hello Faith,
I am sorry you are going thru this first of all. My youngest also goes to colledge and works and yes he does chores.
This is what I did to explain to him . Our relationship has changed you are now an adult you have certain responsiblities like I do as a adult. Part of your responsiblity is help out around the house. This is how it works in real life. Faith you have make up a reasonable list or have him help you on decissions of the list. Talk to him about his future if he was to live on his own how much would it cost. I had my son look up what it would cost for a apt. how much to turn on the lights and water, cable and so on. It was a eye opener for him to realize mom and dad did so much for him. Explain you are not responsible once he hits the age of adult hood that you are taken care of him because you love him and want him to succeed. When he comes back with turning things around refer to the bible:
Ephesians 6:1

[ Children and Parents ] Children, obey your parents in the Lord, for this is right.

1. Colossians 3:20
   Children, obey your parents in all things, for this is well pleasing to the Lord.
   Colossians 3:19-21 (in Context) Colossians 3 (Whole Chapter)

Explain he is still your child but now he is a adult of age cappable of doing chores and going to school even maintaining a job.

Hope this helps. one more thing sorry forgot. Pray before doing this. Believe me pray helps in any and all situations.