Can a congregation be childish?

[csslaw02]

My husband was offered the pastorate to a church near us a few weeks ago. Since then he has moved some items around in the sanctuary and pastor's office. I took my time to clean the S.S. room that would be used for children's church. New updated posters were put up, room was cleaned top to bottom, border on the bulletin boards, and I turned the table around. All this inorder to make things more attractive for visitors.

This past Sunday a meeting was called concerning these minor changes. My husband was asked how gave him the authority to make changes and who gave myself the authority to change the classroom. At the end of the meeting my hubby was told they liked the worship outline and sermons, but "you are making too many changes and you will need to leave".

Can you believe a church can be so childish? How do you expect visitors to come back if the rooms are not cheerful, clean, and cold? This has my hubby and I upset.

 

[Heart4Him]

As petty as it sounds, yes, I believe it! It's so silly to me that moving pieces of furniture or changing decor, etc. could cause a problem in a church but I know it sometimes does.
We've experienced some of these little things within our church when my husband has made minor changes. Luckily, it hasn't been this extreme.
Was your DH only pastoring there for a few weeks and they asked him to leave? Have you left the church? I can hardly believe that a church would ask their brand new pastor to leave over something that trivial.
It's really sad..I hope you are okay! God bless you!

 

[erin74]

Is there something else going on??? Did they approve of you coming??? This is just really odd. I realise some people don't like change, and little things can cause upset, but usually when a pastor first starts people are pretty upbeat and forgiving, giving you a chance to prove yourself.

 

[csslaw02]

Is there something else going on??? Did they approve of you coming??? This is just really odd. I realise some people don't like change, and little things can cause upset, but usually when a pastor first starts people are pretty upbeat and forgiving, giving you a chance to prove yourself.

The entire church was excited!
All we know is one particular man was furious that he wasn't at the meeting to call my husband has pastor. (he was in hospital out of town, return unknown) He comes back weeks later and demands a meeting. There they ask my dh who gave him the authority to move things around. They also asked who gave me the authority to change the classroom for children's church. Keep in mind this room has posters from 1970s. The changes could've been fixed in less than 5 minutes. I don't understand why they didn't call my hubby aside, explain the problem, fix it, and move on. His sermons and worship service altogether was enjoyed by all. They let him go Sunday after morning service yet his name is still on the sign outside of the church. If there is an underlining problem, it was never announced. This one guy saw my hubby move the alter to the right, never said a word. This man at the meeting said I didn't say anything to you because I don't work that way. I speak only at meetings. Grow up. So childish!!

 

[csslaw02]

As petty as it sounds, yes, I believe it! It's so silly to me that moving pieces of furniture or changing decor, etc. could cause a problem in a church but I know it sometimes does.
We've experienced some of these little things within our church when my husband has made minor changes. Luckily, it hasn't been this extreme.
Was your DH only pastoring there for a few weeks and they asked him to leave? Have you left the church? I can hardly believe that a church would ask their brand new pastor to leave over something that trivial.
It's really sad..I hope you are okay! God bless you!

My hubby filled in a couple of times over the past year and he was called to fill the pulpit as pastor 3-4 weeks ago. I think my hubby is going to plant a church. I really feel the church, which is made up of mainly seniors, is not ready to grow. I don't understand why they would ask him to leave either. That's why I feel this church is childish.

 

[Diatheke]

My hubby filled in a couple of times over the past year and he was called to fill the pulpit as pastor 3-4 weeks ago. I think my hubby is going to plant a church. I really feel the church, which is made up of mainly seniors, is not ready to grow. I don't understand why they would ask him to leave either. That's why I feel this church is childish.

YES - plant a church - sounds like that church is run completely by the church board and the church board answers to that one demanding man.
A new pastor should be encouraged to make a few changes and facilitate growth - this all sounds ridiculous. The guy with the power wanted your husband to leave since he wasn't in on the decision and the furniture incident is just an excuse in my opinion to get rid of you.

Shake the dust off and leave them behind without another thought.

Church planting is a wonderful way to start fresh and it completely changes the dynamic of your ministry - you are now inviting people to join in your vision instead of a church dead in tradition and laws bringing you in to dictate what you can and cannot do.

And by the way you did the right thing - updating the children's ministry should be the first priority - if you have a vibrant program for the kids the parents will come.
I can't believe there are churches that still don't get that - get the kids and you get the parents.

 

[erin74]

The entire church was excited!
All we know is one particular man was furious that he wasn't at the meeting to call my husband has pastor. (he was in hospital out of town, return unknown) He comes back weeks later and demands a meeting. There they ask my dh who gave him the authority to move things around. They also asked who gave me the authority to change the classroom for children's church. Keep in mind this room has posters from 1970s. The changes could've been fixed in less than 5 minutes. I don't understand why they didn't call my hubby aside, explain the problem, fix it, and move on. His sermons and worship service altogether was enjoyed by all. They let him go Sunday after morning service yet his name is still on the sign outside of the church. If there is an underlining problem, it was never announced. This one guy saw my hubby move the alter to the right, never said a word. This man at the meeting said I didn't say anything to you because I don't work that way. I speak only at meetings. Grow up. So childish!!

Wow - that's really strange. Although I imagine if you stayed he would not be an easy man to stay with. Did your hubby have a contract or anything. I don't know how it works in your system - the anglican system works well, as it is the bishops call, not the churches!

Has your hubby sought reconciliation with the man who did this?

If you are gone for good, consider what you might learn from the situation. We have always been taught to look for the kernel of truth, and allow the rest to slide off like water off a duck's back. Always take the opportunity to learn how you could do things differently, and grow from the situation.

 

[Ms.Garnet]

I am getting in on this a little late & I may have missed some other posts on this subject, but I will try to be brief. First , I am so sorry you had that experience. I don't know what denomination you are - but perhaps the furniture setting had something to do with (in their minds at least) with their method of worship - who knows? Or it could have been a simple as that someone's great grandma put that furniture there & it is a shrine in that person's eyes ! Right now - at our church - we are dealing with the exact same type of issue - only ours is 6 or 7 shrubs outside ----YES, YES, YES, I said SHRUBS !!!!! Can you believe it ? We are not in conflict though because before I dared touch them or even had them trimmed I approached a head deacon & pointed out how uncitely the overgrown things were. He fully agreed and said there had been issues in the past about them because so & so's granny donated them, etc. (Thank you Lord for impressing me to go to this man before I touched the shrubs !) He took it upon himself to bring it before the church & of course being that it was "one of their own" who brought the issue up , everyone agreed to begin a beautification project (which is far more than I dreamed we could get done here). Even though we have been at this church for 8 yrs. - if I had brought this up it would have never gotten off the table !!!! My point is - like one poster said, you most likely would have been miserable if you tried to stay. I know it was a hurtful & hard experience - but learn from it & keep serving the Lord. As for the children's room - were you assigned to teach the children in that room - was it to be your room - I am very blunt & if I had been asked to teach children in that room & someone asked me who gave me the authority to change it - I would have very bluntly said - the whole church did when they asked me to teach in that room! If it was not to be your room - next time - (and always ask DH to present your issues to the correct board/coommittee to feel them out on how your issue will be received - & if they want to discuss it with you then go to a meeting with them & discuss it)- but as much good as you meant and I think you were very correct to want the church & S.S. room to be inviting - always put feelers out anytime you want to change anything like that. I am not trying to fuss or correct you - I have been there and lived that and just know from experience - ask before you do anything !! Bless you both as you continue to serve the Lord - Ms. Garnet

 

[erin74]

Our issue is fake flowers. Donated on behalf of a non-member on their passing. So when they were no longer there and the great neice (or some kind of relative) came to church at christmas (one off) sure enough - drama!

 

[csslaw02]

I would like to thank everyone that replied to the childish church post. Now I don't feel like a immature adult gripping about silly stuff. When in all reality, everything was done for the good. Thank you again.
God Bless all of you!!!!

 

[Tharsos]

My husband was offered the pastorate to a church near us a few weeks ago. Since then he has moved some items around in the sanctuary and pastor's office. I took my time to clean the S.S. room that would be used for children's church. New updated posters were put up, room was cleaned top to bottom, border on the bulletin boards, and I turned the table around. All this inorder to make things more attractive for visitors.

This past Sunday a meeting was called concerning these minor changes. My husband was asked how gave him the authority to make changes and who gave myself the authority to change the classroom. At the end of the meeting my hubby was told they liked the worship outline and sermons, but "you are making too many changes and you will need to leave".

Can you believe a church can be so childish? How do you expect visitors to come back if the rooms are not cheerful, clean, and cold? This has my hubby and I upset.

With the information you provided I can say that a congregation can be childish