Can a Christian be a Hermit?

[Galadriel]

Wow! You said this way better than I have in my previous posts. I feel your pain.....my family gives me grief over it too. Both of my parents are single and they are 'not wanting to be alone' and they just don't understand that I am okay with it. Dad is the 3rd of 4 children, mum is the 3rd of 5 children. I was an only child until I was 10. I think that makes a difference too. My parents worked 2nd and 3rd shift when I was growing up. I had nobody growing up and adjusted to it. I just wish my parents understood.

When I was in college I tried to 'go out' but I just didn't like it. I went to a state college so going out meant 'party'. I tried that twice....hated it. I tried getting involved with a christian group but never felt that I fit in there either. I was involved with them for the better part of my freshman year but I would guess less than 1/4 of them even knew my name or even spoke to me for that matter.

I don't care for the secular world and I don't feel accepted in the Christian world so in my opinion it's best for me to be a hermit.

You sound a LOT like me!! My family doesn't understand that I am OK with not having tons of friends and that I dont like to just go and "hang out". Man my dad has said some pretty hurtful things. He INSISTS that theres something wrong with me, and that I am not normal, and that its just WRONG to not want to go "hang out" with people. I too don't feel like I fit in with other Christians much either, those groups. Man, and belive me I TRIED to FORCE myself to fit in, its just not me. I am misreable trying to make myself go and "do things" with people as in hang out and such, I would always be like "ok can I go home now?" I have learned its just not me, and that it is ok, and that there is nothing wrong with me. I dont want to hang out and do things (which at this age 21, usually involves alcohol somehow or something like that, no thank you!). People can really try and tear you down and make you feel bad for what you are, but God made you just like you are, and He knows what your natural inclanations are, and that you like to be left alone and not have people around you all the time. Nothing wrong with that.

 

[East_Texas_Sam]

"However, she is soooooooooo negative that sometimes after I spend time with her I almost feel like I have to be cleansed or something."
"I just wish I could meet people who shared similar interests as me."
"I don't think they exist!"
"People in my age group aren't Christians."
"I become bored too easily."

Hi,
My name is Sam, I am grateful slave of Christ Jesus. I minister and teach prisoners and teach Bible study at a retirement home. I have been doing that since 2016. Off course with Covid-19 I am not allowed into these facilities. Hopefully they will next year. I miss the people I minister to greatly.
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This is my first post, I initially came here to find out what should I do in terms of social skill if a Christian friend brings me a plate for Thanks Giving.
I am somewhat of a hermit in terms of the fact that I don't travel, go to anyone's house or have anyone come to my apartment. I experienced emotional abuse and because of that I don't trust anyone.
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Here are some suggestions Hoosier from my years (2012-present) in recovery. [By the way if I make any social errors, please remember that I come from a dysfunctional house (I have not been taught social skills), be gentle with me, but please care enough about me to tell me gently.]

"However, she is soooooooooo negative that sometimes after I spend time with her I almost feel like I have to be cleansed or something."

Something that works for me is reading together. I read the Bible together with someone who is not a Christian. I assume they approach it as literature, but God's Word does not come back empty (Isaiah 55).

I recently listened to Dr. Albert Mohler (Thinking in Public), re: his interview with Ben Sasse on his book. (The vanishing American adulthood). It refreshed me on importance of reading and the fact that it is possible to read a few books a month.

I go to a Christ centered recovery group called: Celebrate Recovery (It is for people with hurts, habits and hang ups). That includes every one.

This is a good place to connect with other Christians. I have a solid support group and friends there, of course I don't go to their house, I only gather with they in public places.

The book (Boundaries by Dr. Henry Cloud) helped me greatly.

"People in my age group aren't Christians."
I gather with other men at my Church for Bible studies. We are men of different age groups. What we share is the love of the Lord Christ Jesus, worshiping Him and God's Word. Look at that at your Church.

They may have that, (women/ men's prayer meetings) if not look at it and ask about it.

We have 2 guys who come meet with us to study the Bible who do not go to our Church.

"I just wish I could meet people who shared similar interests as me."
Is your passion Christ Jesus, God's Word, Growing in your knowledge of God, and Worshiping God?
If so, another place to look at is (BSF, Bible Study Fellowship)

"I don't try to shove Jesus down her throat, so to speak."
What do you think will happen if she dies without knowing Christ Jesus as Lord and Savior?
(Will you look at this 5 Minute movie, Mr. Nice Guy, called: Are you a good person? by living waters)

"I become bored too easily."
Do you like to read?
If so, I recently read that it is possible to read 1 book a week if you read
30+ pages a day.

Again if any of my comments are not consistent with what is desired let me know gently please. I was just trying to be helpful by sharing what I have learned.

Blessings,

Sam
Romans 3:9-28
Here are free Christian documentary movies for you.
(Fully Free Films by Living Waters/ Ray Comfort)

 

[East_Texas_Sam]

[QUOTE="brinley45cal, post: 8378276"
"But maybe the lord wants you to spend more time with him first, you know work on your relationship with him."
[/QUOTE]
Brinley,
That was my situation in 2013. I came out of a dysfunctional home and had experienced emotional abuse.
Spending hours daily with the Lord enabled me to see myself through God's eyes.

In the process I also connected with a support group at a Christians group called: Celebrate Recovery.

I finally found my calling, I have never been happier in my life.

Sam
Romans 3:9-28
Here are free Christian movies of around 30 minutes in length for you
(Fully Free Films)
My favorites are (the 180 movie), and (evolution vs. God)

 

[Aaron_Bethlhm]

YM...my point exactly. If I stay around here I will become bitter and angry at the world much like those around me. Being around negative does begat more negativity. That's the point of me wondering about just becoming a hermit and avoiding people altogether. I guess when it comes to the town I live in, I tend to have the 'grass is greener on the other side' attitude for the reasons I've mentioned in the previous post. People in my age group aren't Christians. I'm the oddball. I'm not into hanging around marrieds or people with kids.

I've toyed with the idea of doing something like you mentioned. The opportunities are kind of hard to come by for me as I work out of town a lot and my hours aren't 'normal.'

One particular Scripture came to mind: "Bad company corrupts good morals".
(God's View, God's Word)
Also, Jesus says "I have not come to bring peace, but a sword"
as well as "IF (this is important "IF")
If you want to BE MY disciple, then you must give up everything and follow ME.
Few ever get this far, although many try to get by doing less, and fail.

Again, someone said "God has separated me for the Gospel's sake" (in other words, taken someone, and separated them from family, friends, jobs, possessions, and so on, so they will be completely and utterly His, with a single eye on Him, not double-minded, and not serving nor trying to serve two masters.

 

[Cj5]

Just wondering because every relationship in my life is a complete joke/failure. My parents have all but forgotten I exist (and we all live in the same town), my 'best friend' is about the most negative and annoying person in the world at times, and well....I don't even KNOW what a boyfriend is. I have no close friends from my church...they are either all my parents' age or early college-age and younger and only seem to know I'm alive during the 'turn around and greet one-another' portion of the service. However, I haven't wanted to switch churches because I actually like going to this one. If it were up to me though, I'd pack a few necessities, leave town unannounced and live in a cave someplace where I could avoid contact with other humans as much as possible. I doubt anyone in my own stupid family would notice! For crying out loud....I'm a part-time dj on a local radio station that plays music my parents like and do they ever tune in? NO! My co-workers at my 'day job' offer more support than anyone in my church or my family---And you know you can't really ever be close with coworkers because it could come back and bite you on the backside. Basically I have nobody outside of God Himself. I'm sick of it. If I am not meant to mingle with intelligent life outside of the internet then I wish God would send me away to a remote island someplace! There, I feel better....sorta

Maybe they just don’t like you?