I have always considered myself to be a Christian, though I have only attended church on occasion when family friends would invite us to their church. I mainly study and practice The Word of God in private, but recently I have become much more involved, as if a switch was flipped inside of me. The reasoning behind that is an entirely separate discussion altogether, though.
The issue I am presenting today is the topic of lust. I have never been involved in a sexual relationship, but I never truly thought having one would pose much of an issue to my relationship with Christ. I had always heard that premarital sex was a sin but am surrounded by a culture that assumes one would not be sent to Hell for something like this. It was just a given, once you find a person and date them for a few months, it isn't wrong to lay with them.
Of course I now have a reignited faith and understanding of scripture, and consider myself an active Christian rather than just a passive believer in The Lord. I know that any sexual act before marriage is sin. It would be my understanding that masturbation would fall within these boundaries, and I have read article after article of people treating masturbation as a sin. What worries me is my growing lust.
God gave man sexuality, for the intention of driving people to marriage. When the Bible was written, humans reached puberty at an older age, and marriage was common as early as 14 years old. In today's society, this is not the case. I am 17 years old, and have no intentions of getting married before the age of 28, as I have a lot of school ahead of me to prepare for my future career.
Even though I have come to the decision that I should not partake in sexual activities with another person, it troubles me that I should not have any form of release from sexual tension for so long. Maybe this would not be an issue if I had never experienced the pleasures of [bless and do not curse][bless and do not curse][bless and do not curse][bless and do not curse][bless and do not curse][bless and do not curse] in my life, but before I became so devout, I regularly engaged in the act of self-pleasure. That is not to say I was addicted or formed a habit of it, though, just that on occasion I would use it to release tension. Now I am finding it more and more difficult to remain controlled.
Some might say this is just a lesson that God has chosen to teach me about self-control, however, I would argue that there are many more factors in this equation than their statement addresses. I am at a very hormonal stage in my life, and the sexual desires and impulses are only growing more and more intense. Sure, I am not saying others have not suffered through this before, but the best way to describe what I feel is a searing ball of fire, burning the insides of my flesh with passion. I know this could be Satan, but scripture also states it is better to marry than to burn.
I am definitely burning, and those who cannot handle temptation should marry according to God, but again this is not an option, and while I am a firm believer in the idea that God does everything for a reason, it is hard to imagine why He would be telling me to marry at such a young age.
Through Jesus our impurities should be cleansed, and our suffering removed, but this seems contradictory to forcing me to live the next 11+ years of my life suffering. I have prayed that my impure thoughts be removed, that my lust be abolished, but nothing has been done. If it were not bad enough that I will not be able to trust myself to even partake in dating before I am looking to marry (else I be consumed by lust and disregard The Lord), but to not even be given a decent form of release from hormonal tension building within me?
Yet another problem arises in this situation. Even sexual thoughts about anyone who is not your wife is considered sin in the eyes of Jesus, which for a single man essentially means every woman. No matter how much I pray, meditate, aim my focus elsewhere, or try to otherwise distract myself from lust, sexual thoughts still enter my mind. The best I can do is repent for these sins which I have committed against The Word, but to repent is to change your way, and I cannot do that, no matter how hard I try. More of this is biological than anything, not just a mindset or obsession. I am still sinning even without masturbation.
I do not really know what I am looking for in terms of answers, support, or any other response you might have to this wall of text, but I suppose I am looking for a solution that does not exist. I am probably just supposed to live the next 11+ years suffering to prove my alliance with Jesus, and maybe I am incorrect for saying that this seems a bit harsh and against the whole concept that Jesus stands for. Is not my undying faith in Jesus Christ enough to spare me from an eternity in Hell? Or maybe I am wrong in wanting to go to Heaven, for that is too selfish a desire? It seems that reguardless of what I do in this situation I will not be saved, as there are too many sins to avoid, and only an elite few die worthy of walking with Jesus. Should I, then, knowing I am a creature of sin, relieve my suffering and give in to my carnal desires and release sexual tension, living at peace with the fact that I will be bound to an eternal Hell when this body of mine breathes its last breath?
Any and all thoughts are welcome, thank you for taking the time to read this.
The issue I am presenting today is the topic of lust. I have never been involved in a sexual relationship, but I never truly thought having one would pose much of an issue to my relationship with Christ. I had always heard that premarital sex was a sin but am surrounded by a culture that assumes one would not be sent to Hell for something like this. It was just a given, once you find a person and date them for a few months, it isn't wrong to lay with them.
Of course I now have a reignited faith and understanding of scripture, and consider myself an active Christian rather than just a passive believer in The Lord. I know that any sexual act before marriage is sin. It would be my understanding that masturbation would fall within these boundaries, and I have read article after article of people treating masturbation as a sin. What worries me is my growing lust.
God gave man sexuality, for the intention of driving people to marriage. When the Bible was written, humans reached puberty at an older age, and marriage was common as early as 14 years old. In today's society, this is not the case. I am 17 years old, and have no intentions of getting married before the age of 28, as I have a lot of school ahead of me to prepare for my future career.
Even though I have come to the decision that I should not partake in sexual activities with another person, it troubles me that I should not have any form of release from sexual tension for so long. Maybe this would not be an issue if I had never experienced the pleasures of [bless and do not curse][bless and do not curse][bless and do not curse][bless and do not curse][bless and do not curse][bless and do not curse] in my life, but before I became so devout, I regularly engaged in the act of self-pleasure. That is not to say I was addicted or formed a habit of it, though, just that on occasion I would use it to release tension. Now I am finding it more and more difficult to remain controlled.
Some might say this is just a lesson that God has chosen to teach me about self-control, however, I would argue that there are many more factors in this equation than their statement addresses. I am at a very hormonal stage in my life, and the sexual desires and impulses are only growing more and more intense. Sure, I am not saying others have not suffered through this before, but the best way to describe what I feel is a searing ball of fire, burning the insides of my flesh with passion. I know this could be Satan, but scripture also states it is better to marry than to burn.
I am definitely burning, and those who cannot handle temptation should marry according to God, but again this is not an option, and while I am a firm believer in the idea that God does everything for a reason, it is hard to imagine why He would be telling me to marry at such a young age.
Through Jesus our impurities should be cleansed, and our suffering removed, but this seems contradictory to forcing me to live the next 11+ years of my life suffering. I have prayed that my impure thoughts be removed, that my lust be abolished, but nothing has been done. If it were not bad enough that I will not be able to trust myself to even partake in dating before I am looking to marry (else I be consumed by lust and disregard The Lord), but to not even be given a decent form of release from hormonal tension building within me?
Yet another problem arises in this situation. Even sexual thoughts about anyone who is not your wife is considered sin in the eyes of Jesus, which for a single man essentially means every woman. No matter how much I pray, meditate, aim my focus elsewhere, or try to otherwise distract myself from lust, sexual thoughts still enter my mind. The best I can do is repent for these sins which I have committed against The Word, but to repent is to change your way, and I cannot do that, no matter how hard I try. More of this is biological than anything, not just a mindset or obsession. I am still sinning even without masturbation.
I do not really know what I am looking for in terms of answers, support, or any other response you might have to this wall of text, but I suppose I am looking for a solution that does not exist. I am probably just supposed to live the next 11+ years suffering to prove my alliance with Jesus, and maybe I am incorrect for saying that this seems a bit harsh and against the whole concept that Jesus stands for. Is not my undying faith in Jesus Christ enough to spare me from an eternity in Hell? Or maybe I am wrong in wanting to go to Heaven, for that is too selfish a desire? It seems that reguardless of what I do in this situation I will not be saved, as there are too many sins to avoid, and only an elite few die worthy of walking with Jesus. Should I, then, knowing I am a creature of sin, relieve my suffering and give in to my carnal desires and release sexual tension, living at peace with the fact that I will be bound to an eternal Hell when this body of mine breathes its last breath?
Any and all thoughts are welcome, thank you for taking the time to read this.
