Broken

[Broken Hearted]

Today I just feel so BrokenHearted again. Nov. 21 will be 9yrs since my father passed due to cirrohsis of the liver. It will be 2yrs and 1 month since I lost my mom to suicide and it will be almost 10 months since I lost my brother to suicide. I try to be strong I try so hard. But I just cant seem to get this brokenheart of mine to heal. I miss them so deeply and it just cuts so deeply in my heart. Therapist say it gets easier and they seem to think that Ive learned to cope but in reality I dont know really. I cant seem to just let go its all Ive ever known in life was to hold on deeply to my family and yet they had to leave me. I have my sister still with me and thats it. I want to live for her and to be strong as I always have been. But deeply down in my heart Im hurt and lost. I never imagined losing them this early in life. I always dreamed of a life that was filled with them being with me. Just so hurt and Broken. Missing them deeply in my life with me.

 

[power2theweak]

(((((Broken Hearted)))))

 

[Broken Hearted]

Thank you (((POWER)))

 

[singpeace]

Today I just feel so BrokenHearted again. Nov. 21 will be 9yrs since my father passed due to cirrohsis of the liver. It will be 2yrs and 1 month since I lost my mom to suicide and it will be almost 10 months since I lost my brother to suicide. I try to be strong I try so hard. But I just cant seem to get this brokenheart of mine to heal. I miss them so deeply and it just cuts so deeply in my heart. Therapist say it gets easier and they seem to think that Ive learned to cope but in reality I dont know really. I cant seem to just let go its all Ive ever known in life was to hold on deeply to my family and yet they had to leave me. I have my sister still with me and thats it. I want to live for her and to be strong as I always have been. But deeply down in my heart Im hurt and lost. I never imagined losing them this early in life. I always dreamed of a life that was filled with them being with me. Just so hurt and Broken. Missing them deeply in my life with me.

Broken Hearted,

I know just what you feel. In the past three years, two of my husband's brothers committed suicide, and his mother died of cancer.

Many people can't imagine going through something like what you are forced to deal with now.

Keep seeking God. Keep your mind and heart on him. He cares for you and one day will reward all of us - there will be no more tears. But what you are going through can be a powerful tool for God to work through you. Allow yourself time to heal. It takes 16 months on average to get over the death of a loved one. You will come out on the other side much wiser, stronger, and able to help others. Fake it 'til you feel it.

Matthew 11:25-30
Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest. Take my yoke upon you and learn from me, for I am gentle and humble in heart, and you will find rest for your souls. For my yoke is easy and my burden is light.

 

[JCFantasy23]

Wow, that is a lot of trauma to handle.

I am so sorry for all the losses and pain.

My prayers are with you.

 

[Broken Hearted]

Thank you singpeace for yours words and JCFantasy for your prayers. They mean alot to me. And I truely appreciate them and need them.

 

[Broken Hearted]

9yrs today and still a knife to this heart. All I can do is remember it all and everyone and cry my eyes out. My life has never been the same since then and instead of easing just more pain on top of more pain.

 

[k.miles]

Brokenhearted,

You've been through a lot. Sometimes things just are what they "are". No words of "Keep your head up" or "You'll get through it, just stay positive" can automatically heal the wounds you have.

There's not always a pretty picture we can paint around situations. We have to face them for what they are and use them flourish ourselves into something greater than we were prior to the painful situation. It's not easy, it doesn't feel good, and you'll want to quit. But it is nonetheless possible!

I strongly encourage you to read this blog post:

whatyoudontunderstandcanhurtyou.com/blogs.theinbetween.htm

I hope that reading that article encourages you to break through your anguish.

Take care

 

[writergirl4god]

I'm praying for you Brokenhearted. I know the holidays can be so hard when you're missing/grieving for family. *E-hugs* from a sister in Christ!

 

[Hisbygrace]

Dear Brokenhearted,
There are no words that can ease your pain and to have lost so many loved ones
in such a short span of years is so hard to understand, but time does heal our broken hearts. That doesn't mean that there won't still be times when we will desperately miss our loved ones or long to have them near, it just means that the pain will lessen.
I pray that our heavenly Father will comfort you with the peace beyond understanding and that He will restore joy to your heart as you begin to remember the beautiful, wonderful times each of you shared together.

 

[xTx]

Hi Brokenhearted, I admire you for surviving. I really do. [Salute].

God loves you so much. I can feel that He (God) loves you.

hugs, xTx

I lost my Mom when I was 11 + almost 12
I lost my Dad when I was 14 + almost 15
I lost my sister after that.

And, I thought it was the worst. But, hey, am still here. Why? I don't know.

I have this faith that when God calls, and you feel Him calling you.

You are all right. I am so glad you are posting here.

I am so happy to know Jesus. I really am. Praise God.

And, Jesus will raise us all to life on our last day.

xTx

May God bless you Brokenhearted. Please keep posting

 

[xTx]

9yrs today and still a knife to this heart. All I can do is remember it all and everyone and cry my eyes out. My life has never been the same since then and instead of easing just more pain on top of more pain.

Hi Broker Hearted,

I understand. I do.

The feeling I have is like a tugging feeling and tears just beneath the surface of my "cheerful" smiles.

For example, I was at a party and I was laughing then suddenly I felt like crying.

I do not have a therapist even though I have friends who are willing to sponsor me. I did not want to burden them.

From how I have experienced it all, I feel, really feel, it will never go away.

Just take life less hard, try to make yourself happy.

Underneath the surface of happiness, the tugging at the heart will be there. The tears.

That is how it is for me. Just sharing how I feel.

And, I have kind friends who have invited me way in advance for the holiday celebrations, I have declined. I just feel too sad.

I am afraid I might suddenly burst out crying when everybody is laughing and having a good time.

But, I am cheerful.

God bless you. I do not know why I am putting this down here.

I sometimes have no idea why I do things.

I just want to say, I do know how you feel.

Hugs and lots of hugs, xTx

 

[Broken Hearted]

(((xTx)))
Thank you so much for sharing with me. It means alot to me. Love ya very much. If you ever need me Im here for you to. HUGS

 

[Broken Hearted]

Today is my momma's birthday and Im really sad. Ill be taking flowers to the grave later today. But I really wish she was here for me to give her them in person like I always did. Just seeing her big grin everytime I had flowers waiting for her when she woke up and the love she gave me I truely miss.

HAPPY BIRTHDAY MOMMA I LOVE YOU WITH ALL MY HEART​

 

[power2theweak]

Today is my momma's birthday and Im really sad. Ill be taking flowers to the grave later today. But I really wish she was here for me to give her them in person like I always did. Just seeing her big grin everytime I had flowers waiting for her when she woke up and the love she gave me I truely miss.

HAPPY BIRTHDAY MOMMA I LOVE YOU WITH ALL MY HEART​

(((hugs))) I pray that God will comfort you today. I know you miss her so. (((hugs)))

 

[xTx]

Today is my momma's birthday and Im really sad. Ill be taking flowers to the grave later today. But I really wish she was here for me to give her them in person like I always did. Just seeing her big grin everytime I had flowers waiting for her when she woke up and the love she gave me I truely miss.

HAPPY BIRTHDAY MOMMA I LOVE YOU WITH ALL MY HEART​

Lots of Hugs, xTx

 

[Broken Hearted]

Thank both of you. It really means alot. God bless you two and much LOVE to both of you. HUGS

 

[Krissy Cakes]

Hey sis

I'm so very sorry for all the people you lost My heart breaks for you.

Please know I am praying for you

God Bless you and MUCH LOVE sis!

 

[Broken Hearted]

((((Krissy)))) Thank you so much. I love you. HUGS

 

[Krissy Cakes]

Sis if you ever need to talk please don't hesitate to contact me

Love you