Bisexual deep in sin...Need help!

[TheyCallMeDave]

So, you would you want your wife not to tell you if she were? Would you rather ask her periodically?

If the answers are yes, I see no hypocrisy in that.

Honestly, if i were married again, I would be very sure that my Spouse was a genuine committed Follower of Christ with ongoing evidence long before Id walk down the isle ; that should greatly reduce any chance of adultery occuring so long as there was very open honest forthright communication while the marriage was underway. In the highly unlikely event that Adultery took place, I would not want to know about it and I would trust God to work out the shame , guilt , healing in my Spouse in addition to her recommitment to the marriage. If I would/could find out about the adulterous affair...I would hope it would be toward the end of our lives together during which time i could forgive her and be comforted that she still chose to live her life with me , loving me, even though she made a terrible mistake earlier on.

 

[boundtofall]

Dave: Yes I do would like to be able to confess the truth to her. I'm not disagreeing with you in the fact that I really don't have to tell her as long as I completely repented and confess my sins but the truth is that at this point I feel the need to tell her b/c my feelings have not changed about being with a man. At least by telling her the truth, if she was to accept me (forgive me and continue in the marriage), I can openly seek professional help. The truth of the matter is that I alone...by prayer cannot find strength enough to turn away from the sin. Although I've never been in favor of professional help (seeing a psychologist) I believe prayer alone hasn't helped.

My sexual problems haven't been something I've just been doing without any remorse. I have done it, completely repented of it but then as days/weeks go by I begin to fantasy once again. I either touch to get the feeling off my mind or if I abstain from masturbation and continue holding the urge, i finally give in and have relations with this man. At first I tried to satisfy my urges by having sexual relations with my wife but the feeling of being with a man and submitting myself would not go away by doing so. eventually i found someone (a man) to be with to satisfy my urge. The frequency of my visits to be with this man therefore are very scarce (a handful of times a year). Nevertheless, masturbation or the act of sexual relations with a man let alone the adultery and lying are depriving me of being close to God and walking in the light.

I haven't made up my mind yet as to WHEN I'm going to tell my wife about it...but my mind has been made up about telling her! I wasn't completely sure I wanted to tell her until I opened up in this forum and most of the answers have been to do so. Perhaps the Lord has worked it up in me to confess to her. I need all the prayers right now to be strong and find the right words and the right time.

Thanks again to everyone.

 

[TheyCallMeDave]

Dave: Yes I do would like to be able to confess the truth to her. I'm not disagreeing with you in the fact that I really don't have to tell her as long as I completely repented and confess my sins but the truth is that at this point I feel the need to tell her b/c my feelings have not changed about being with a man. At least by telling her the truth, if she was to accept me (forgive me and continue in the marriage), I can openly seek professional help. The truth of the matter is that I alone...by prayer cannot find strength enough to turn away from the sin. Although I've never been in favor of professional help (seeing a psychologist) I believe prayer alone hasn't helped.

My sexual problems haven't been something I've just been doing without any remorse. I have done it, completely repented of it but then as days/weeks go by I begin to fantasy once again. I either touch to get the feeling off my mind or if I abstain from masturbation and continue holding the urge, i finally give in and have relations with this man. At first I tried to satisfy my urges by having sexual relations with my wife but the feeling of being with a man and submitting myself would not go away by doing so. eventually i found someone (a man) to be with to satisfy my urge. The frequency of my visits to be with this man therefore are very scarce (a handful of times a year). Nevertheless, masturbation or the act of sexual relations with a man let alone the adultery and lying are depriving me of being close to God and walking in the light.

I haven't made up my mind yet as to WHEN I'm going to tell my wife about it...but my mind has been made up about telling her! I wasn't completely sure I wanted to tell her until I opened up in this forum and most of the answers have been to do so. Perhaps the Lord has worked it up in me to confess to her. I need all the prayers right now to be strong and find the right words and the right time.

Thanks again to everyone.

You could tell her but it better come with the promise to her that you will immediately enter into professional Christian Counselling to overcome the Homosexuality once and for all.

It is imperative you tell this man that you never wish to see him again . Forget any feelings that may have developed between you because it was a confused love if any love at all exists . And then you can tell your wife that youve taken this action as further proof that youre serious about repenting.

Ill pray for you. If you wish, let us know how the conversation went between you and your wife.

There is hope for you as many have kicked this confused sexuality before. Its going to take you really rolling up your sleeves in doing everything possible to overcome it.

Lastly, before you talk to your wife , you might want to get checked out for STD's at your local Health Facility then you can assure your wife that you are clean. This will be important to her.

 

[Yearling]

I have an unconventional approach to it, but you might want to consider going to a deliverance ministry. This is ministry in Christianity that exorcises demons.

Consider the scripture:
“When an impure spirit comes out of a person, it goes through arid places seeking rest and does not find it. 44 Then it says, ‘I will return to the house I left.’ When it arrives, it finds the house unoccupied, swept clean and put in order. 45 Then it goes and takes with it seven other spirits more wicked than itself, and they go in and live there. And the final condition of that person is worse than the first. That is how it will be with this wicked generation.”

I did not know it, but I had 5 demons inhabiting me because I watched porn, listened to the wrong music, and harbored some resentment towards males. There's a chance there might be the same amount or more inside of your body. Demons are also assigned to ruin a person spiritually when they are born, although God counteracts this with assigning a guardian angel to each person to protect them.

I know a deliverance minister who has 13 years of experience, and she knows that almost every person is dealing with spiritual problems caused by a demon. Some aren't, but many are. This is without even knowing about it or understanding their feelings are caused by demons. Demons often enter through sins and generational curses (I can explain more in detail if you want)

I have dealt with lust myself and every time I get the lust demon delivered, and begin to do lustful things again, it is 7 times worse. I know exorcisms are real and they look very similar to the ones of Bob Larson's youtube page. If you go to MinisteringDeliverance (dot com) and fill out the referral form on the "Need Deliverance?" page, there is a good chance they will send you a list of deliverance ministries you can go to. They are very effective, because when the demon leaves I lose all desire to sin, although I am tempted by the very same demons (although they are easily ignorable). It is only when you give in to temptation that they have the legal right to enter your body and further tempt you even worse. They can go on to even possess you to sin. This is when deliverance is the best approach to the situation.

After you go through deliverance, it is important to get filled up with the Holy Spirit. I would say, even when you haven't undergone deliverance, you should FAST, PRAY, and ask God to IMPART YOU WITH THE HOLY SPIRIT so that you are filled up and have no room for demons to torment you. They will probably leave you or weaken just because of that. If you go to deliverance, they'll leave right away. Sometimes Ruth, the minister, sees demons who complain about how the person is always so focused on Jesus, they beg to leave!

Fast so that the Holy Spirit becomes stronger in you. I reccomend working on a juice fast for a a few days a week, and sometimes do a dry fast. This will discipline you, and if you are in constant prayer during this time, God will give you more of the Spirit to help you stay away from sin.

Good luck Ask me if you have any questions on this approach.