Best rap lines

[Denshuu]

What are some of the most memorable bars you've heard? Most of the ones that stand out in my mind are from Eminem and Chino XL, who churns out hilarious punchlines like clockwork.

"This here's something stupid for your eardrum
Wanna hear something slick son? Here it come
You can ask Dr. Phil, I'm ill
I'ma kill you, then kill him, then Kill Bill" - Erick Sermon[size=-1]

"Dont get me confused with these suckers
'Cause when I spit you hear more 'Oo's than a Skip To My Lou move at the Rucker." - Lloyd Banks

"I'm so homophobic I don't even put my clothes in the closet." - Eminem

[/size][size=-1]The best freestyle punchline I've ever heard thrown in a battle:
"[/size]I got so many ways to diss you that I'm playful with you. I'll let a razor slit you 'til they have to staple stitch you. And everybody in this place'll miss you if you try to turn my facial tissue to a racial issue." - Eminem
[size=-1]
[/size]A line from Talib who somehow managed to make a triple-entendre:
"I burn these leeches like salt when I lay in the cut" - Talib Kweli

And, because I now realize that pretty much half this post is of Em quotes, I'm just going to post a portion of this verse. There's just too much here:

You flowers got no clout with a thing
You could date a stick of dynamite and wouldn't go out with a bang
I showered the slang, simple as A,B,C's
Skip over the D's and rock the microphone with E's (ease)
Dethrone MC's and I'ma max alone
Relax your dome like a solo from a saxophone
So facts are known, writers get treated with shocks
I rock a beat harder than you could beat it with rocks
I'm greeted with flocks of fellow follower singers
You couldn't make the fans throw up their hands if they swallowed their fingers
But you can bring yours let's see what you got
But don't front and never try to be what you're not
Cause you can be quick, jump the candlestick, burn your back/
And meet Jill on a hill, but you still ain't Jack

 

[blackwasp]

I would get warned for most of these, so I'll try to clean them up:

"Slob on...like corn on the cob."
Three 6 Mafia

"I am the truest, name a rapper that I ain't influenced."
-Nas

"Will Smith don't gotta cuss in his raps to sell records..."
-Eminem

 

[Arnold_Philips]

"Oh golly gee / Not another day on the 46A / I shoulda caught the 46B"
-Del tha Funkee Homosapien

"Punch you with my fist and I'll knock you on your [REAR END] / Then I'll steal your lawnmower so you can't cut your grass"
-my friend Jose battling a couple years ago

"Am I to rap as France is to Morocco? / Am I colon rap colon colon France colon / Morocco?"
-MC Paul Barman

 

[Qyöt27]

Let's kick this OLD SCHOOL...

"MC's they retreat cause they know I can beat 'em
And eat 'em in a battle and the ref won't cheat 'em
I'm the best takin' out all rookies
So forget Oreos eat Cool J coookies"
-LL Cool J, "Bad"

"So I took her to my crib, and everything went well as planned
But when she got undressed, it was a big old mess, Sheena was a man
So I threw him out, I don't fool around with no Oscar Meyer wiener
You must be sure that the girl is pure for the Funky Cold Medina

You know, ain't no plans with a man
This is the 80's, and I'm down with the ladies
Ya know?"
-Tone Lōc, "Funky Cold Medina"

 

[ez3729]

dont push me cuz im close to the edge im tryin not to lose my head. huh, huh huh huh its like a jungle sometimes it makes me wonder how i keep from goin unduh. i think that was grand master flash. peace

 

[hoiven]

[Eminem]
I've been praised and labelled as crazed
My mother was unable to raise me, full of crazy rage
An angry teenager, nothin can change me back
Gangsta rap made me act like a maniac
I was boostin, so influenced by music I used it
as an excuse to do [STUFF], ooh I was stupid
No one can tell me nothin hip-hop overwhelmed me
to the point where it had me in a whole 'nother realm
It was like isolatin myself was healthy
It felt like we was on welfare but wealthy
Compelled me to excel when school it failed me
Expelled me and when the principal would tell me
I was nothin, and I wouldn't amount to [ANYTHING]
I made my first million and counted it
[the rest of this song is edited out]


--dat's sum tyte ryhm'n

 

[ps139]

MOD HAT ON

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Pay special attention to 4.1 and 4.3.

I am cleaning up this thread right now, and this is a pre emptory warning NOT to post anything that you think might violate these rules.

Thanks

MOD HAT OFF

 

[Redguard]

Hey Denshuu, nice avatar!

 

[ez3729]

skip, jive, what can i say ,i cant get along without my o.j. to the bop to bop say scooby doo guess what america we love you. sugarhill gang

 

[HotRhymez]

Middle fingers flipped at censorship
Your friends just flipped over the swift penmanship
Ever since I spit some (beep) on Infinite
I been givin it a hundred and ten percent- Eminem


We ain't eager to be legal
So please leave me wit the keys to your Jeep Eagle
I breathe ether in three lethal amounts
When I stab myself in the knee with a diseased needle -Eminem

Oh - you want me to watch my mouth, how?
Take my (beep)) eyeballs out, and turn em around?
Look - I'll burn your (beep)) house down, circle around
and hit the hydrant, so you can't put your burning furniture out! -Eminem

Sorry if any of that violated the rules..I tried to edit it as best I could, lol

 

[Moros]

Tupac's Only God Can Judge Me, There's A Heaven For A G, and Dear Mama are all lyrical masterpieces of the genre.

 

[Denshuu]

Some dumb stuff from Jakki:

"Like a professional #2, I pro-duce"
"Your style's like adult education: Old School"
"My style'll kick you out the box like a homeless dude's landlord"
"You're overrated like a triple-X Disney film"
"You got bad Aim like you bought spoiled toothpaste"
"Your life doesn't have a memory card, therefore you will not be saved"
"I'll catch you off-guard like security officers on they lunchbreak"
"You couldn't be my facsimile if you were part of my symmetry"
"If you introduced me to your toes I still couldn't meet de-feat"

More funny punchlines:

Reject my single I ain't mad at it
Like O.J. getting married again.. i'll take another stab at it
Chino XL

Eternally verbally, I have numbers, succumb to time outs
In rhyme bouts you gotta dial 9, just to get a line out
Wordsworth

You can call me Eminem 'cause I wouldn't sign you for 50 Cents
Copyright

 

[NinaSofiya]

I think I like Josh Tobin...

"Shootin' people by day, goin' clubbin' by night, being a gangster is hella tight."

Those are some lyrical skillz right there.

 

[Guioam]

"Punch you with my fist and I'll knock you on your [REAR END] / Then I'll steal your lawnmower so you can't cut your grass"
-my friend Jose battling a couple years ago

lol, thats so great

 

[aric714]

Eminem...............Don't see why everyone thinks he's so great?

 

[trashy]

JayZ:
Black Album
'Threat'
Grown man I put hands on you
I dig a hole in the desert, they build The Sands on you
Lay out blueprint plans on you
We Rat Pack [bless and do not curse][bless and do not curse][bless and do not curse][bless and do not curse][bless and do not curse][bless and do not curse], let Sam tap dance on you
Then, I Sinatra shot ya God [bleep] you
... I put the boy in the box like David Blaine
Let the audience watch, it ain't a thang
Y'all wish I was frontin, I George Bush the button
Front of all you in your car lift up your hood [bless and do not curse][bless and do not curse][bless and do not curse][bless and do not curse][bless and do not curse] run it
Then lift up your whole hood like you got oil under it
Your boy got the goods y'all don't want nuttin of it
Like, castor oil, I Castor Troy you
Change your face or the bullets change all that for you
... y'all [bless and do not curse][bless and do not curse][bless and do not curse][bless and do not curse][bless and do not curse][bless and do not curse] is targets
Y'all garages for bullets, please don't make me park it
in your upper level, valet a couple strays
from the 38 special, [bless and do not curse][bless and do not curse][bless and do not curse][bless and do not curse][bless and do not curse], God bless you

 

[ez3729]

hoop, scoop, loop de loop to take ARtes Gilmore straight to the hoop. Slam, pow hear the sound of the swish of the net from the turn around. to give the game all that i got, to never miss a jump shot, well to capitalize on their mistakes to run and gun on the fast break. -hurt em bad

 

[hoopz]

"Then I be walking through the pearly gates
with an infared scope ten millimeter heater
Cuz if my name ain't in the Book of Life I'm snuffing St. Peter" - Ras Kass

"When i was twelve I went to hell for snuffin jesus, im waving automatic guns at nuns" -Nas

"Hail mary, [wash my mouth][wash my mouth][wash my mouth][wash my mouth] her. i never knew her i would prolly screw her and dump her body in a sewer." -Notorious B.I.G.

"I'm taking lives for a great price, I'm the type that snap in heaven with a mack 11 and rape christ." -Big L

"The Big L is strictly gunplay, I run through church and pistol whip the priest every sunday" -Big L

"The Virgin Mary never [wash my mouth][wash my mouth][wash my mouth][wash my mouth]ed nobody but she sucked dick, and licked the [wash my mouth][wash my mouth][wash my mouth][wash my mouth] a nasty concubine and vice versa so she probably do the whole nine, that nasty hoe" -Pastor Troy