Is it possible to be a good person without being a Christian?
Of course! That is just sensible. I think of goodness as having a sense of decency toward others, and there are plenty of thoughtful people out there.
Is it possible to be saved without being a Christian?
Saved from what?
The reason I ask -- we could be saved from ourselves, or destructive nature. Or saved from real guilt, with a clean slate declared. Or invited to heaven, a specific destination with specific people. Saved from a frightening judgment. Or given favor in the eyes of God, because of His grace and our faith.
Some people seem to forget what saved is, and use it as a star-belly label.
In Jesus' teachings, the default is death, and the offer is eternal life.
Given the way that Christians act, what does it mean to be a Christian?
Oh my. Loaded question.
When I first became interested in Christianity, the Christians I knew were kind, humble, generous, outgoing, not fearful, well-grounded, at peace with themselves.
The Christians I know now are more bound with fear of rules, fear of failure or success... maybe I just know them better, or they are more open about their weaknesses. Some people astound me with their patient reactions to conflict. Others astound me with their irreverence.
There are some odd teachings out there, that God doesn't care how good we are. For salvation, maybe, but He certainly made His points in the Old Testament about valuing respect for others. What I know of God makes me think He looks on non-believers who are thoughtful and kind, with delight.
Forgiveness and redemption were sealed, once for all. We step out in faith, trusting that God means what He promised. This decision to accept the grace, with repentance, seals our fate.