Been avoiding regular church services :(

[derpytia]

I just... can't seem to want to go to anything but the current lenten midweek services we have and even when I went tonight, I didn't want to be there.

Part of that is due to my struggles with tinnitus and not being able to bear loud noises.

The other part is... it doesn't make me feel at peace with God. Going through the service only makes me cry. I sit in the back cry room (a room that's used for parents with babies that cry so that they don't disturb the people in service and so the parents can still partake in the service) and I cry and let the tears fall all through the service.

The songs and hymns make me cry. The blessings make me cry. Everything in service makes me cry. It's not a good kind crying either. I'm truly very hurt inside and am struggling and God is the only one I hold onto. But nothing about what He's done for us or anything makes me smile anymore. It all only makes me sad and sick at heart.

 

[R. Hartono]

What has Jesus done wrong ?

 

[derpytia]

What has Jesus done wrong ?

Absolutely nothing at all. He's done everything right. But apparently I still cry.

 

[R. Hartono]

Its not easy to carry the cross of Jesus, we might fall again and again but we have to get up and take back the cross on our shoulder until the end, because Jesus is the only Salvation.

 

[Daniel9v9]

A contrite heart is better than a cold heart! Don't worry

 

[Grace2022]

Speak to the pastor. Have an hour with him or another trusted wise christian. This is where fellowship is at it's best.

 

[Aino]

Matt. 18:19-20 “Again, truly I tell you that if two of you on earth agree about anything they ask for, it will be done for them by my Father in heaven. For where two or three gather in my name, there am I with them.”

Usually attending regular church services does good for us, but then there are times, when we'd benefit from something else. Counseling, more casually meeting up with a pastor, or a friend or two... You know your own specific needs and hurts. Maybe it's time to take a small break from Sunday services and instead focus on smaller-scale prayer / discussion / Bible study settings where you can focus on whatever you need atm. Maybe, if church in and of itself makes you hurt, maybe take the time on that break to consider what other churches you could think of attending. Church is supposed to build up christians, not tear them down.

 

[Not me]

Absolutely nothing at all. He's done everything right. But apparently I still cry.

Who are you crying for. ????

Love in Christ, Not me

 

[Greg Merrill]

I can relate. Our church has been having a "Congregational Prayer" printed in the bulletin for us to recite together for a few months now. Lately it always was mentioning the negatives about Christians and our need to repent. This became depressing and upsetting to me, until one Sunday I walked out in the middle of it and went to the back to the "cry room" to wait it out. I decided just not to pray these depressing prayers any more. When the next CP came out it was totally without negativity. I sent an email to the pastor and told him how I had been feeling. He said his wife agreed with me, and that what he had been doing was a carry over from his Methodist days. He said he would change these prayers to be celebratory rather than repentant.
Some people actually leave such churches as Lutheran, Catholic, Methodist, etc., and either go to a different church of same denomination, or change denominations, or go non-denominational. The determination should have to do with if these churches are teaching the Bible correctly first of all, and then whether the pastor/church is helping you in your relationship with God, or not.

 

[com7fy8]

Part of that is due to my struggles with tinnitus and not being able to bear loud noises.

How loud are we talking about? I suspect some churches are being abusive, by turning up their amplifiers much more than enough to be heard, within reason.

In one church, I put moist wads of toilet paper in my ears; please do note, though, that medical professionals say this is an absolute no-no. But you could put on ear protection muffs or use plugs which are approved by medical professionals.

But, more than this . . . are you getting help to walk with God, enjoy sharing more and more closely with Him, and finding out how to share and relate with other Jesus people? We need to share with people who help us be more and more real with God and in loving as family while we are reaching to lost people.

But these mature Jesus people might not be in pulpits. They might be in the back of the church; they are gentle and quiet and humble, and so some number of people might find them to be boring. What if you find really Christian people and they are gentle and quiet? Will you find their quietness to be boring?

 

[JenniferLW]

I just... can't seem to want to go to anything but the current lenten midweek services we have and even when I went tonight, I didn't want to be there.

Part of that is due to my struggles with tinnitus and not being able to bear loud noises.

The other part is... it doesn't make me feel at peace with God. Going through the service only makes me cry. I sit in the back cry room (a room that's used for parents with babies that cry so that they don't disturb the people in service and so the parents can still partake in the service) and I cry and let the tears fall all through the service.

The songs and hymns make me cry. The blessings make me cry. Everything in service makes me cry. It's not a good kind crying either. I'm truly very hurt inside and am struggling and God is the only one I hold onto. But nothing about what He's done for us or anything makes me smile anymore. It all only makes me sad and sick at heart.

 

[JenniferLW]

I'm sorry this is happening. It sounds really lonely and painful. Maybe try visiting another church or two or three for some fresh perspective. Not that you're church shopping but for some fresh insight. These church bodies are also brothers and sisters in Christ. You could go visit and then maybe you will have a new appreciation for for your current church or at least you might understand why you are having these experiences at your church home. I hope you can get some relief and get back to a closeness, comfort and awe with our Jesus who loves you.

 

[pinkjess]

are you depressed?

 

[FireDragon76]

Try to connect with other people at your church, especially your pastor. There is nothing wrong with expressing grief in this vale of tears, especially with what you are going through. It's the season for it, after all.

I would be cautious about going to other churches. Perhaps your suffering is actually what God is calling you to witness to in your church. Churches should not be places where only the happy are welcomed.

 

[Andrew77]

I just... can't seem to want to go to anything but the current lenten midweek services we have and even when I went tonight, I didn't want to be there.

Part of that is due to my struggles with tinnitus and not being able to bear loud noises.

The other part is... it doesn't make me feel at peace with God. Going through the service only makes me cry. I sit in the back cry room (a room that's used for parents with babies that cry so that they don't disturb the people in service and so the parents can still partake in the service) and I cry and let the tears fall all through the service.

The songs and hymns make me cry. The blessings make me cry. Everything in service makes me cry. It's not a good kind crying either. I'm truly very hurt inside and am struggling and God is the only one I hold onto. But nothing about what He's done for us or anything makes me smile anymore. It all only makes me sad and sick at heart.

Well, there are different ways to go about that.

Obviously you need more help than we can provide here. Meet with the pastors wife, or someone, and talk about everything.

Um... you know generally you should be in Church, because it's what is right to do, and what a Christian does.

But I don't think about this stuff from a concrete set in stone view point.

Sometimes you need to spend time alone. Now I would encourage you to not just stay at home and watch TV, or a movie or something.

If you don't want to go to church, because something is truely toxic in your soul that makes church miserable.... ok.... I can meet you there at this problem in your life.

But do something at home. Find an online church. Listen to a sermon, maybe one that relates to what you are having trouble with. Or even, just read through one book in the new testament. Put a clock up, and read through a gospel. One hour. Then pray that G-d will help you struggle.

I think that's fair. You can't go to church, ok. Read for 1 hour. Pray that G-d will help you back to the point you can go to church again.

Too many people in our culture spend too much time being alone. But sometimes there are people who don't spend enough time alone, and need to have some time just by themselves, to help them through something difficult.

Especially if you are grieving over something lost. I don't know what it is that was lost, and it doesn't really matter so much. But you need alone time. Not TV and movie, and binge eating time, but real alone time.

And if you need to stay away from Church for a little while to straighten that out, that works for me. Just make sure you are moving towards getting settled to go back to church. If you quit going, and a year later are still not going, then we need to move you towards some counseling.